The Daughter Repercussion
by TBBT78
Summary: Sequel to The Doula Recurrence. When Leonard Hofstadter learns he has a daughter with Joy, his discovery sets in motion a chain of events which threaten to change his life forever... Essentially a Leonard and Penny story, but all characters will make an appearance. DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Big Bang Theory.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This fic is a sequel of The Doula Recurrence. In terms of the timeline, this story picks up right where the previous story ended with Leonard telling Penny about the daughter he unknowingly fathered with Joy. In all fairness you probably need to have read Doula Recurrence to follow this new story, although I will try to detail the back story for those who haven't. As always your feedback and reviews are appreciated.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Big Bang Theory. I just love and am intrigued by the characters.**

With a face exuding fierce determination Penny barged her way passed the receptionist at Zangen, marching her way defiantly towards the director's office. At forty-seven she was still youthful in appearance, having retained her wavy blond hair and toned physique, for those who didn't know her, she could conceivably be mistaken for the sister of her eldest daughter rather than the married mother of three that she was. Throwing the door to the office open she found Bernadette seated at her desk engaged in a Skype conference call.

"You knew about Lauren!...How dare you keep it from us?!" Penny yelled, jabbing her finger accusingly at the woman who for as long as she could remember had been one of her closest friends. After meeting while waitresing at the Cheesecake Factory, Penny and Bernadette had had formed a friendship which spanned more than two decades. Unperturbed and with an air of calm professionalism, Bernadette apologised to her client on her screen. Promising to call him back, she got to her feet and moved toward the window which looked out onto a large open plan office.

"And how dare you burst into my office and yell at me while I'm in the middle of a very important meeting!" she seethed after drawing the blind, affording some privacy from the prying eyes of her staff who had abandoned their work in favour of watching the drama unfolding in their boss's office. Just then the door opened and Tiffany, the receptionist who Penny had successfully eluded in the downstairs foyer appeared.

"I thought I made it perfectly clear that I wasn't to be disturbed today!" Bernadette barked. The years had certainly not mellowed the blond microbiologist, who had managed to work her way up to the position of Chief Executive Officer of Zangen Pharmaceuticals. Her fiery temper had gained her a reputation as being a fearsome boss who had no tolerance for staff who underperformed or failed to tow the line.

"I'm sorry Dr Rostenkowski...she ran right passed me," she apologised, "Shall I call security?"

"Thank you but that won't be necessary," Bernadette answered curtly, "Please go back to work now."

Nodding obediently, Tiffany closed the door leaving the two friends glaring at each other across a large oak desk.

"Look, why don't we just sit down so we can talk?" Bernadette suggested in the hope of breaking the deadlock. Penny was furious and in truth Bernadette didn't blame her. It had been a secret which had weighed heavily upon her conscience for months and in many ways she was relieved that it was finally out in the open. "Penny can you please just give me a chance to explain?" she urged.

Letting out an infuriated sigh, Penny lowered herself into a brown leather upholstered chair. "I just can't believe this is happening." she cried, simultaneously dissolving into tears.

Nodding sympathetically, Bernadette passed Penny a tissue from the box on her desk. "I know. And I am sorry." she said quietly.

Penny wasn't ready to forgive her just yet, but having calmed down substantially after her outburst, she was now at least willing to hear what she had to say.

"Did Leonard tell that you how I found out?" Bernadette asked as she watched Penny dab at her mascara streaked eyes with the tissue.

"I guess I didn't exactly give him the chance." Penny admitted, feeling mildly ashamed. Convinced that Leonard was having an affair, she had confronted him on the roof of their old apartment building in Los Robles Avenue before running away upon hearing his confession affording him no time to explain properly.

"It was after Joey and Grace's engagement," Bernadette began, recollecting the dinner party which Leonard and Penny had hosted at their house and to which on her suggestion they had extended an invite to Joy. Following a particularly acrimonious divorce, Bernadette had felt sorry for her and had thought that she might enjoy an evening in the company of her friends. "I was at a restaurant after work and I saw Joy sitting at the bar alone. She seemed to be drinking heavily, I was concerned so I went over. She was drunk and making a fool of herself so I took her outside to try and sober her up." Bernadette recalled, omitting from her story the part where Joy had vomited over her favourite pair of designer shoes. "Joy started to get hysterical. I tried to calm her down and then all of a sudden she came out with it. She told me that Lauren was Leonard's daughter and about how Lucas had agreed to marry her and raise Lauren as if she were his own."

"And you just took her word for it?" a disbelieving Penny exclaimed.

"I didn't want to believe her, but somehow I just knew that she was telling the truth. the thing is Joy started dating Lucas a few weeks after she went to her cousin's wedding with Leonard," Bernadette explained, "When she announced that she was pregnant and getting married I just naturally assumed that the baby was Lucas's."

"So Joy was willing to let her daughter grow up not knowing who her real father was." Penny concluded in disgust, "How could she do something that?"

"Penny I tried so hard to convince her to tell the truth," Bernadette continued after noticing fresh tears glistening in her eyes, making her evermore fearful for the future of their friendship. "I drove Joy home from the bar. We talked for hours, but she literally begged me not to say anything. She made me swear that I wouldn't tell you or Leonard... She was so convinced that if Lauren were to find out after all this time that she'd wind up losing her.."

"Well she got that right," Penny snorted bitterly. "I just don't get it. If Joy was so determined to keep it a secret, why tell her now?"

Bernadette gave a bemused shrug. She didn't know how Lauren had come to learn the truth about Leonard. Her best guess was that Joy had blurted it out whilst drunk or during one of their many mother-daughter fights. Shifting uncomfortably in her chair, she fiddled with her star-shaped pendant necklace that had been a gift from Howard many years before.

"There's something you're not telling me, isn't there?" Penny said, eyeing her friend with mistrust. "Bernadette, if you know something you have to tell me."

Bernadette had no intention of holding anything back, clearing her throat she answered,"On the the night of Grace and Joey's wedding Joy tried to commit suicide."

"Oh my God. How do you know?" Penny gasped.

"Jake told me. I think he just wanted to confide in somebody.."

Jake Cunningham, a mutual friend, had discovered Joy on a bridge late that night. Threatening to jump, he had managed to coax her to safety. "Apparently Joy said something about how she'd been lying to Lauren all her life and how she was never going to forgive her for it."

Bernadette had first met Jake when she had hired him as her doula while pregnant with her son Joey some twenty years ago. Now divorced from his second wife and living in LA again, Jake worked part time as an emergency medical technician to supplement his income. Penny herself had never forgotten the story he'd told about how he had been inspired to pursue a career as a doula after a patient had given birth in his ambulance. "Now I think about it that could have been the night Lauren found out about Leonard being her real father." Bernadette hypothesised.

"Leonard did tell me that Lauren showed up at our house the day after the wedding." Penny remembered. Like pieces of a complicated puzzle, everything was suddenly beginning to make sense. "Does Jake know about Leonard being Lauren's father?" she questioned.

"No, only I know." Bernadette confirmed.

There was a silence while a dazed Penny reflected upon all that she'd come to know that day.

"Penny, do you think can you ever forgive me?" Bernadette began sounding almost childlike and pulling Penny away from thoughts of her own three children and how they might react to the news. "I'm so sorry. I know I did a terrible thing in not telling you, but please don't hate me for it." She begged.

As angry as she was in that moment, Penny knew she could never bring herself to hate Bernadette. "I don't hate you." She said softly.

Before Bernadette could reply there was a knock on her office door. Fearing another tongue lashing, Tiffany poked her head gingerly inside. Speaking in a hushed tone she said, "I know you said you didn't want to be disturbed Dr Rostenkowski, but Mrs Hofstadter's husband is here. He seems pretty upset."

After holding Penny in his arms for a long time, Leonard drove them both back to their home in South Arroyo. It was mid afternoon and Bobby their eleven year old son was still in school, while Madelyn, their newborn daughter was sleeping upstairs in a newly converted nursery. "Leonard I'm sorry I ran out on you earlier," Penny apologised after they'd sat down at the kitchen table with the intention of talking about what had happened that day. "When you told me about Lauren I just freaked out. I really wasn't not ready to hear that."

Curled up at Penny's feet, Albert the Hofstadter's pet Labrador was staring up at her with sad dark eyes. Refusing to leave her side, he even failed to show any interest when Leonard tossed his favourite ball the length of the kitchen for him to retrieve.

"Honey, believe me I was just as freaked out as you when I found out about Lauren," Leonard confessed, " I'm just glad that we're talking instead of yelling at each other." he added.

At fifty-three Dr. Leonard Hofstadter still had curly brown hair, although it had thinned over the years and was tinged with strands of grey. Many times he had been tempted to dye it, but Penny insisted that she preferred it that way, according to her it made him look distinguished. As the head of the experimental physics department at Cal Tech, he no longer dressed in casual attire for work, having long since swapped his nerdy T-shirts and Converse sneakers for tailored suits.

"Can I ask you something?" Penny said after a pause to gather her thoughts.

"Sure, anything."

"Did you ever have feelings for Joy?" she asked quietly.

Finding Joy to be obnoxious and uncouth, Leonard remembered telling Howard how the date which Bernadette had set up after he'd invoked the 'girlfriend pact' had been the worst he'd ever experienced.

"No."

"So it was just about.."

"Sex," Leonard cut in, "Yes, nothing more than that."

"And Joy? Was it just about sex for her too?" Penny persisted.

"I thought so."

"You thought so?"

"After her cousin's wedding I didn't think I wouldn't hear from her again, but she called me wanting to go on another date. I had to tell her that I didn't think it was going to work out for us." Leonard admitted.

"And she was upset?"

"I guess...but then I heard from Bernadette that she was dating some guy called Lucas. After that I never heard from her again." Leonard said. Although not something she was proud of, Penny had engaged in her fair share of one night stands after their break up, but hadn't had the misfortune of getting pregnant. "Sweetheart I really am so sorry," he whispered, "What I did was really stupid and right now I'm having a real hard time forgiving myself for it. Not least because of everything you've been through this year.."

Reaching for her husband's hand, Penny reassured him that if anyone was to blame it was Joy and her husband for withholding the truth. As she saw it, he was as much a victim of their deceit as Lauren herself. Curious to know more about Leonard's newly discovered daughter she said, "Tell me about Lauren. What's she like?"

"Erm.. well she's a little shy when you first meet her, but after you get to know her she's funny and really smart. She plays guitar in her spare time, although she insists she isn't very good. Right now she's studying for a masters degree in chemical engineering. She's only twenty-two, but academically she's already made some very impressive achievements...Hey what's so funny?" a bemused Leonard questioned when Penny began to chuckle.

"Sweetie, she sounds just like you!" she laughed.

Leonard hadn't really considered it before, but there were indeed several similarities between himself and his daughter.

"You know I'd really like to meet her." Penny said.

"You would?"

"Sure of course. She's your daughter and half sister to our kids."

Penny's kindness and humility despite extraordinarily difficult circumstance never failed to impress Leonard and to remind him why he fell in love with her all those years ago. "Have I ever told you how totally amazing you are?" he breathed huskily.

"You have. But I don't have a problem with you telling me more often." Penny answered with a rueful smile.

After talking for a while longer, Leonard urged Penny to take a nap while Madelyn was still asleep. Without protest Penny got to her feet.

"What will we tell the kids?" she asked as she reached the kitchen door. They had already discussed telling Grace in person when she and Joey returned home in a couple of weeks for Raj's birthday party.

Leonard simply replied, "The truth."

* * *

On Sunday evening Leonard accompanied Penny to the annual soap opera awards. Seated beside her in an auditorium buzzing with nervous anticipation, he squeezed her hand and listened as the names of the nominees for the life time achievement award were read out.

" _And the winner is... Penny Hofstadter for her role in Matters of the Heart."_

Penny's jaw dropped in amazement, mouthing _"oh my God"_ she turned to Leonard to find him grinning proudly. The houselights dimmed and a montage of clips featuring depicting Penny's character Paige McIntyre played out on a big screen. As the lights came back up Penny rose to her feet and made her way toward the podium to the sound of thunderous applause where she made an emotional acceptance speech, thanking her former co-star Daniel Harrison and the show's producers. Finally she thanked Leonard, describing him as her soul mate and expressing her gratitude for his unfailing support. Later that evening Daniel too received an award for best actor along with several other members of the cast. After the ceremony Leonard and Penny posed together for photographs on the red carpet and although ordinarily Leonard would shy away from the lime light, that night he found himself reveling in his wife's achievement and enjoying every moment.

"Sweetie, are you coming to the after show party?" Penny asked. Several members of the cast had picked up awards and were keen to continue the celebrations at a beachfront nightclub in Santa Monica popular with celebrities.

"I have an early start tomorrow so I think I'm going to head home, but you should go," Leonard encouraged, "Tonight's your night honey. Have fun."

Joining other members of the cast, Penny rode in a limo to the Beach Comber nightclub where she hit the dance floor, spending the next two hours showing off her numerous dance moves.

"So this is where you're hiding out?"

After managing to make her escape unnoticed, Penny had sought refuge outside on the roof terrace which looked out over the Pacific Ocean. Turning towards the voice she saw Daniel Harrison. Dressed in black tuxedo suit, holding a bottle of champage. Ten years her senior, Daniel had played the part of Penny's love interest and philandering husband. After years of working together, she and Daniel were the closest of friends who had gone on to develop an on screen chemistry which had been nothing short of magical.

"Not that many years ago I could have danced all night," Penny said, smiling wistfully, "Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm not twenty seven anymore."

"Well I like to think that what we lack in stamina we make up for with experience." Daniel said.

"I'll have to remember that." Penny giggled as they clinked glasses.

"Would you like some champagne?" Daniel offered as he settled himself beside on a raffia couch beside her.

Currently breastfeeding, Penny replied that she was sticking to drinking soda and for a while the two former co-stars sipped their drinks in silence while listening to the distant tinkling of a buoy and the muffled thud of music filtering from inside the club.

"You know I meant what I said the other day," Daniel began, "About you being a class act. Seriously you have more talent in your pinkie finger than some of these new kids on the show."

Ever since Penny's character had been cut in favour of bringing in several younger actors, Daniel had become increasingly disillusioned with the show. He hadn't yet confided in her, but he was thinking about asking the producers for a sabbatical to allow him to pursue other acting projects. While speaking on the phone with her he had joked about a Bobby Ewing style storyline which would bring Penny's character back to life.

"Wow, thank you. I really miss working with you." Penny confessed, feeling herself blushing at his compliment. "I just don't know where the last twenty years had gone." she added with a faraway look in her eyes.

"Hey, do you remember your first day on set?" Daniel asked, feeling reminiscent all of a sudden, "You were nearly half an hour late."

Chuckling to herself Penny took a sip of her champagne. "Actually, that isn't quite true. I wasn't late." She said.

"What do you mean you wasn't late?" a puzzled Daniel questioned. He'd been on set that day and remembered very clearly how infuriated Bruno the director had been by her lateness. "He was so mad I thought he was going to spontaneously combust!" he laughed.

Penny drained her glass and set it down on the glass top table. "Ok, can you keep a secret?" she asked, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "I've never told anybody this. Not even Leonard."

"I'm listening."

"I wasn't late. In actual fact I was early, but after I parked my car in the parking lot that morning I just froze."

"You froze?"

"Yeah, I was so afraid I literally couldn't move. It just hit me that how close I was to finally realising my dream, what if I screwed it up? And then there was you. Truth is I was so in awe of you that the thought of working with you petrified me."

"Wow..." Daniel exclaimed. "And all these years I just thought you were a terrible timekeeper." he grinned, earning himself a playful wack with one of the cushions on the couch. "But you did make it."

"Yeah, I realised I was about to blow what was probably my one and only chance of making it as a successful actress and so I pulled myself together, grabbed my script and got out the car."

"And the rest as they say is history," Daniel concluded, pleased that after so many years Penny had finally shared her secret with him. "And I'll always be so glad that you did."

"Hey what are you guys doing out here? "

Penny and Daniel turned to see Gabi, a long standing actress on the show beckoning them enthusiastically to return the dance floor. Filtering out from inside the club they could hear the opening bars of Eric Clapton's _'Wonderful Night'_ , the song which had been the first dance for their on-screen wedding.

"Shall we?" Daniel said, extending his hand toward Penny, "For old time sake?"

"I never could say no to you Troy McIntyre." Penny smiled as she let him lead her to the dance floor.

* * *

At home Leonard had said goodnight to Amy and Sheldon and after they left checked in on Bobby and Madelyn who he were sleeping soundly. After getting ready for bed, he headed back downstairs to his study where he switched on his laptop with the intention of reading through a paper co-authored by one of his colleagues. He had only read the first few lines when the phone on the desk beside him began to ring.

"Daddy?

It was Grace his eldest daughter who had recently married Howard and Bernadette's son Joey and moved to Chicago where she was completing her studies to become a nurse. "Sweetheart, is everything ok?" a concerned Leonard asked. It was 11pm which made it after midnight in Chicago.

Making the call outside the entrance to the emergency room in the chill of a late September evening, Grace had been studying in the hospital library when an alert popped up in her social media feed. What it revealed had shaken her to the core.

"Is it true?" she cried, "What they're saying about you and mom?"

All at once the colour drained from Leonard's face. "Is...is what true?" he stammered.

Just then an ambulance pulled up, its siren drowning out Grace's reply. "Grace darling I can barely hear you."

Turning back to his laptop Leonard minimised the paper on the screen, brought up Google and typed Penny's name into the search box. "Shit.." he cursed as within seconds countless pictures of Joy originating from celebrity gossip websites appeared on the screen. Some were even speculating that Penny had moved out of their home and had filed for a divorce.

"Daddy, are you still there?" he heard Grace demand in a strangled voice, "Is Lauren your daughter?"

 **Wonderful Tonight written by Eric Clapton, 1977, Warner/Chappell Music Inc.**


	2. Chapter 2

**UDISCLAIMER: I don't own the Big Bang Theory. I just love the characters**.

Leonard didn't sleep that Sunday night. At 6am he rose from his bed and with Penny snoring softly he got dressed and headed downstairs. Leaving a note on the kitchen table he grabbed his car key. Thirty minutes later he pulled his car into the parking lot of Body Sync, a gym located on the outskirts of Pasadena. Entering inside, Leonard was greeted by the smell of stale sweat lingering in the air and the grunts of a solitary man working out with weights. On a running machine he spotted Joy and immediately felt his anger rise. Taking a deep breath, he strode boldly towards her.

"Leonard Hofstadter!" Joy exclaimed, feigning surprise. "I didn't have you down as a gym kinda guy."

"We need to talk."

"Do we?" stepping off the running machine, Joy dabbed at the nape of her neck with a towel, "What about?"

"Don't play with me Joy. You know damned well about what!"

Joy tossed her used towel casually into a basket and Leonard followed her as she ascended a wrought iron staircase up to a mezzanine. "Well?" she demanded impatiently after closing the door to her office, "Why don't you just say what you have to say because I'm really rather busy."

"Why did you do it Joy? Why did you go to the press?" Leonard demanded, "Don't you think Penny has been through enough this year without having our private life splashed all over the internet? They're saying I cheated on her."

Most upsetting was the speculation now that Leonard and Penny' marriage was in difficultly.

"I would have thought that what with you being a so called _'genius'_ ," Joy began, using her fingers to illustrate invisible speech marks in the air, "That my motive would be obvious to you."

"So you don't deny it then?" Leonard snorted. From the moment he'd seen the story on the internet he'd known that Joy had to be behind it. Nobody else in their circle of friends would ever stoop so low.

"I don't deny it. Nor do I regret it." Joy shrugged with a satisfied smile. Picking up a pile of unopened mail from her desk she scanned the envelopes before stuffing them into a drawer. "But since you're so interested I did it for the money," she continued, "I may have lost my marriage and my daughter, but I have absolutely no intention of losing my business too. Let's just say it needed a cash injection and I cashed in on an opportunity."

In the last year the gym which Joy had gained as part of her divorce settlement had run into financial difficulties. Had she not been paid a substantial sum of money for her story she had no doubt that her beloved gym would have been facing foreclosure in a matter of weeks.

"Wow, you are really are a piece of work," an infuriated Leonard seethed. "You know damned well that I never cheated on Penny!"

"Really? So the name Mandy Chow doesn't mean anything to you?" Joy said with a satisfied smile. "Oh, I did a little digging around myself. Barry Kripke was most helpful. Mandy was too. So, you're not as clean cut and wholesome as you'd have folks believe."

Leonard tensed and swallowed the lump in his throat."I'm warning you Joy. From now on stay away from my family."

"Are you threatening me Hofstadter?" Joy laughed.

"Just keep away from us. We don't want anything more to do with you," Leonard repeated. "And that goes for Howard and Bernadette too."

Having said what he'd come to say Leonard turned abruptly and walked away.

"How is Howard by way? "I heard it was he was in the running for some big shot engineering job at NASA."

There was something menacing in the tone of Joy's voice which halted Leonard in the doorway.

"You know it's funny what you remember, we were so wasted at my cousin's wedding and yet I distinctively recall you telling me about him being so desperate to get a girl to date him that he broke into a government facility and crashed the Mars rover!" Joy continued. "Hmmm what else...he used a military satellite to locate a house of top models. He slept with a prostitute in Las Vegas. Doesn't sound to me like the kind of person that NASA would employ, does it?"

"Howard is a different person now," Leonard interjected defensively, shocked that Joy remembered their drunken post-sex conversation in such detail. "And anyway that was years ago."

"Yeah, it was. And we all made mistakes when we were younger," Joy conceded. "My mistake was getting pregnant by an experimental physicist who I thought was really into me, but in the end just wanted me for sex. Still, that was then and this is now." She concluded primly.

"So that's what this is really about, revenge?" Leonard said to which Joy responded with a derisory snort.

"Oh please don't flatter yourself!" she scoffed, "You weren't that good."

And with that Leonard left.

* * *

The morning of Jake's discharge had finally arrived. After three weeks in the hospital he was getting ready to leave and was eagerly waiting for his daughter Anna who had insisted upon driving him home. Anna was nearly half an hour late when she arrived to find her father signing his discharge papers and laughing with one of the nurses.

"It's great to see you laughing again Daddy." She commented after apologising for her lateness. At the age of twenty-eight Anna was a lawyer and junior partner at an LA law firm. Fiercely ambitious and in the early stages of her career, she'd been stunned to discover recently that she was pregnant.

"Precious was just telling me about when her Mom worked in the ER," an amused Jake chuckled as he zipped up his case in preparation for the journey home, "Apparently one night a guy came in with a robot arm stuck to his... well a rather intimate area. I've heard some funny stories over the years, but that has to be the best!"

Despite her exhaustion after a sleepless night spent dashing to and from the bathroom to be sick; Anna managed to muster a weak smile."That is funny." She agreed.

It was then that Jake noticed how pale and fatigued his daughter looked. He knew that her she was in the habit of working very long hours and would regularly spend the whole night at the office when preparing for a forthcoming trial. "Sweetheart, you look worn out." he remarked.

"I guess I haven't had much sleep lately," Anna admitted, "Work has been pretty full on too."

"Well, you really should take better care of yourself," Jake frowned. "Have you had breakfast? Maybe we could grab a bite to eat in the cafeteria." he suggested.

For Anna the mere mention of food was enough to bring on a wave of nausea, sending her running out into the hallway to the bathroom to be sick. When she emerged she found father waiting outside.

"It must be something I ate at the restaurant last night." She said dismissively, hoping to allay her father's concerns, but instead he insisted on her going downstairs to the emergency room.

"Anna, food poisoning can be serious." he cautioned. "I really think we should get a doctor to check you over."

"Daddy really I'm fine." Anna reiterated as they made their way down the hall toward the elevator. Jake had stubbornly refused to get into a wheelchair, insisting on walking out to the parking lot.

"Well you don't look fine to me." Jake persisted.

Realising that her father wasn't going to give up Anna turned abruptly on her heels to face him. "Daddy I'm not sick, well I am, but not because I ate something. I'm pregnant." She blurted out.

The stunned silence which followed was broken by an electronic ping as the elevator arrived. The doors slid open and out stepped Marjorie the candy striper who seemed intent on engaging Jake in the latest hospital gossip.

"Sorry Marjorie gotta run." he said as he steered Anna into the elevator.

After alighting on the ground floor, Jake purchased a bottle of water from a vending machine and encouraged Anna to take sips. After that they ventured outside and into the hospital gardens where they took a seat on a bench beside an ornamental pond.

"Are you feeling any better?" he asked Anna after a few minutes had passed.

Anna nodded. The fresh air was definitely helping to ease her nausea. "God knows why it's called morning sickness. I have been throwing up morning, noon and night." She laughed.

"How long have you known?" Jake enquired.

"Three weeks."

"And how does Raj feel about it?"

"I haven't told him yet." Anna confessed after taking another sip of water. Out of the corner of her eye she could see her father watching her and knew what he what he was thinking. "Ok, I know I should have told him already, but this is lot to deal with. What with you being in the hospital my head has been all over the place."

"I'm not judging you." Jake responded, "I just want to help. It must have been one hell of a shock."

"Ha! You got that right."

"So, why haven't you told Raj?"

"Daddy you know what Raj is like," Anna sighed, "He gets so carried away. He'll probably want us to get married and go looking for schools all on the same day. I know he's always wanted to be a father, but my career is in such a good place right now...I don't know if I'm ready for babies and marriage."

After losing his wife Emily to cancer Raj had never remarried. Grief stricken and no longer able to live in what had been their marital home, he'd quit his job at the university to go home to India where he lived for nearly ten years before eventually returning to America.

"Lots of women manage to have a successful career and raise a family," Jake said. "Your Mom and I had only just graduated from college when she fell pregnant with you. Sure, it wasn't easy, but we managed."

Anna had often wondered whether her parent's marriage might have survived had she not been born when they were both still so young. Jake however had always insisted that that he was largely to blame. His work had meant he was hardly ever home which had put an interminable strain on their relationship.

"Raj told me that he loves me." Anna said softly.

"Oh..And?"

"And well I didn't say it back...he just caught me completely off guard. Since then things have been a little weird between us."

There was a protracted silence while Jake reflected upon everything that his daughter told him. "Well, it sounds like you have a lot of thinking to do, but if you want my advice I think you need to talk to Raj."

"I know. And I will." Anna promised, her head coming to rest wearily on her father's shoulder. She was dreading the mountain of witness statements and evidence files which she knew would be waiting for her back at the office. She only hoped that she could muster the energy to get through it all without her co-workers noticing how exhausted she was. "I'll tell him after his birthday this weekend." She added.

"Anna, you know whatever it is you decide to do," Jake began after planting a kiss on the top of Anna's head. "You will have my full support."

An elderly man in a robe and slippers shuffled passed pushing an IV pole. "What about you Daddy? Are you going to be ok?" Anna asked after a brief silence.

"I'm fine. It'll take more than a stray bullet to finish me off." Jake chuckled.

For Anna there was nothing remotely funny about her father coming so close to losing his life while saving Penny from Noah Geiger, Kathy Geiger's vengeful brother.

"I mean about Penny. Before all this happened you said you were leaving Pasadena." she said. While she hated the thought of her father moving away, she sympathised with how difficult it was for him being part of Penny's circle of friends while having to hide his love for her.

"Hey, listen you don't worry about me," Jake began reassuringly. "Sweetheart, I know you're this really successful lawyer now, but beneath that tough exterior you're still my little girl. I promise you I'll be here for as long as you need me."

Hearing this Anna's eyes filled with tears, her father was right, she did need him. Now more than ever.

* * *

On Friday afternoon Leonard left work early to drive to the airport to meet Grace and Joey who had flown from Chicago for Raj' birthday party. That evening the Hofstadter family gathered in the kitchen for a special welcome home meal, apart from Joey, who had decided to dine with Howard and Bernadette.

"So guys there's something your Dad and I would like to talk to you about," Penny began after they'd finished listening to Grace speak animatedly about how well her nursing studies were going and how much she loved Chicago. "We were wondering how you'd feel about maybe meeting Lauren?"

"Does she like trains?" Bobby enquired.

Both Leonard and Penny had been relieved by how enthusiastically their son had taken to the news that he had another sister, although he'd admitted to being a little disappointed that Penny herself wasn't pregnant again.

"Well, if Lauren comes over on Sunday for dinner maybe you could ask her yourself." Leonard suggested.

Just then the room filled with the sound of Madelyn crying coming over the baby monitor on the kitchen island. "I'll go." said Leonard, pushing his chair away from the table and getting to his feet.

For a while Penny watched her daughter pick at her salad with disinterest. "Sweetie, is something bothering you?" she asked to which Grace gave a noncommittal shrug. "I know it's a shock finding out that you have another sister, but from what your Dad has told me she sounds great. He thinks you'll really like her."

"I don't have a problem with Lauren Mom. My problem is with Daddy. I mean seriously how could he date somebody like Joy. She's totally hideous." She said, her face creasing into a look of repulsion, "Did you see the way she was flirting with Jake at our wedding? Talk about desperate."

"Did Daddy cheat on you?" Bobby interrupted.

"No, Daddy didn't cheat on me. We were broken up at the time." Penny answered honestly.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you and Daddy break up?" Bobby continued, "Didn't you love him?"

Even with the passage of more than twenty years it still hurt Penny to think back on her break up with Leonard and the three years that they were apart thereafter."I loved your Daddy very much. I was just scared to admit it," She explained. "Aside from having you guys, marrying your Daddy was the best thing I even did."

Chewing thoughtfully on a piece of tomato Bobby said, "Did Daddy take a PNA test? You know like they do on TV?"

"It's called a _D_ NA test." Grace corrected her brother.

Until now Penny hadn't given any thought as to whether Leonard had taken a paternity test. If he had he certainly hadn't mentioned it to her.

"Mom?"

"Hmmm..Sorry?"

"Has Daddy taken a DNA test?" Grace repeated.

"Wow you guys are certainly full of questions tonight, aren't you?" Penny chuckled, somewhat flustered by the unanticipated grilling by her offspring, "I don't think I had so many when I was interviewed by David Letterman." She laughed, playfully ruffling Bobby's hair.

"Well I reckon he should," Grace said pointedly. "After what Joy did I don't think she can be trusted."

In the downstairs hall Leonard had overheard almost the entire conversation and got butterflies when he'd heard Penny admit to loving him. Feeling his cell phone vibrate in his pants pocket he pulled it out to find that he'd received yet another text, the fifth that day, each message more disturbing than the last.

"Honey, I'm sorry I have to go out for a while," Leonard announced, returning to the kitchen.

"Sweetie you haven't even had your dinner yet." Penny protested, motioning toward his plate of food on the table that had gone untouched, "Surely you can eat with us first."

"Sorry I can't. I promised Howard that I would take care of something for the party tomorrow." Leonard replied apologetically.

Before Penny could reply Leonard had grabbed his car key from the bowl on the kitchen island and disappeared out the door into the yard leaving her to stare after him.

* * *

On Saturday night, as per the plan which Sheldon insisted upon code naming _operation_ _plutonium_ Leonard phoned Raj. Pretending to have forgotten that it was his birthday, he asked him whether he would babysit for the evening while he and Penny attended a charity gala. Reluctantly Raj agreed and at little after 7pm with all his friends hiding out in the back yard he pulled his car onto the driveway. As he always did he made his way around the back of the house.

"Hello?" he called, "Leonard?... Penny?"

The house was in darkness and Raj was beginning to wonder whether he'd got the wrong night when Albert came bounding towards him. Bending down, he stroked the affectionate Labrador. "Where is everybody?" he asked.

"Surprise!"

Suddenly a light came on, illuminating the familiar faces of all his friends and colleagues from the university. Even Stuart Bloom who he hadn't seen for a number of years was there with his wife Denise.

"Oh my God you guys!" Raj gasped as he surveyed the yard that was decked out with eighties memorabilia, a marquee and a stage for Joey's band to perform. Among several plasma globes there was a giant rubix cube and a neon cocktail sign. In centre place was a replica of the Dolorean car from the Back to the Future movies. "I really don't know what to say."

As requested all the guests had come in costume as either a character from an eighties movie or celebrity. Penny had chosen to come as Madonna, wearing a black bustier corset dress, beads and lace gloves, while Leonard was Maverick from the movie Top Gun, wearing a flight suit.

"Is Anna here?" Raj asked after Penny had provided him with one of her cocktail creations which she had aptly named a _'Club Tropicana'._

"I don't think so," she answered, "Maybe she's running late. I'm sure she'll be here."

Two hours later the party was in full swing. Howard took to the stage to perform a cabaret style magic routine while Joey and his band played their version of Queen's _It's a kind of magic._ Out of practice and having had little time to rehearse, his routine began to descend into chaos. It was only after he'd stepped down from the stage, his face glowing with embarrassment that he noticed a forlorn Raj alone behind the wheel of the Dolorean.

"Hey, do you know what's up with Raj?" Leonard asked.

"Anna hasn't showed up." Howard sighed.

"I don't understand, I thought things were going well between them."

"He's convinced that he's blown it with her," Howard explained as they watched Penny approach the Dolorean with another cocktail for Raj and to try and coax him out of the car. Joey's band had begun to perform a Huey Lewis and the News number and the dance floor was rapidly filling up. "He says he hasn't heard from her days."

"Has he tried calling her?" Leonard questioned.

"She's not answering. You know I don't think I've seen him this cut up since Emily died." Howard admitted.

After confiding in Penny Raj was now resting his head miserably on her shoulder.

"Hey, where are you going?" Leonard called after Howard who was now striding purposefully in the direction of his car.

"To find Anna!" he yelled.

Twenty minutes later Howard had parked outside Anna's Art Deco style apartment building. Taking an elevator to the third floor, he knocked on the door and waited.

"If you're looking for Miss Cunningham she's not home."

Hearing a female voice behind him Howard turned around to find a plump-faced woman with bright red lipstick and her hair in rollers standing in the doorway of opposite apartment.

"What! Who the hell are you?" she shrieked.

"I'm sorry if I scared you Ma'm," Howard apologised. In his rush to leave the party it hadn't occurred to him to change out of the black and white striped suit and green wig which comprised his costume that night. "I've just came from a party. I'm Beetlejuice. You know like from the movie? _Let's turn on the juice and see what shakes loose_." he recited, attempting to impersonate Michael Keaton.

"Huh?" the woman said staring blankly at Howard who decided to swiftly change the subject to Anna.

"And how is that you know Anna?" the woman enquired, "I haven't seen you around here before."

"Actually she's dating my friend. She was supposed to be coming to his birthday party tonight only she didn't show up." Howard explained.

"Hmmm.." the woman mused, folding her arms across her chest and eyeing Howard with mistrust. "What did he do?"

She'd encountered Raj in the hallway a number of times and had been surprised by the notable age difference between him and Anna.

"He didn't _do_ anything. Believe me Raj is the kindest, most caring guy I know." Howard replied. "He would never hurt Anna. He's just been unlucky and had a rough time with relationships."

"Sure, I know _his_ type," the woman stated knowing, apparently choosing to ignore all tha Howard had said in Raj's defence. "They get bored and they trade in their wives for a younger model. I should know my sister Marjorie went through the same thing."

She was about to launch into the tale of her sister had cut all her husband's suits to pieces when she'd discovered his affair when Howard interrupted.

"Listen not that it's any of your business Ma'm, but Raj didn't leave his wife for anybody. He was married, by Emily, his wife, she died." he said tersely.

"Oh...I'm sorry," the woman, blushed, "That's so sad. It must have been very hard for him." She added.

"It was," Howard said quietly. "So you see if you know where Anna is I would really appreciate your help."

"I'm sorry, but I really don't know where Anna is," the woman sighed. "She called me this morning, only she didn't say where she was going or when she'd be back. She just wanted to ask if I'd take care of Perry Mason."

"I'm sorry?"

"Her cat." the woman clarified.

"Well, if you do hear from her would you please ask her to call Raj? or she can call me is she wants." Howard asked before producing his business card from his wallet and handing it to the woman who studied it with interest.

"Wow, that's a lot of letters you have after your name Howard Wolowitz." she commented, smiling. "You must be very smart. I'm sorry I couldn't help you, but I do hope you enjoy the rest of your party."

Having failed to find Anna, Howard knew there was little chance of enjoying the party. Reluctantly conceding defeat, he thanked the woman and made toward the elevator.

"You know I'm really worried about Anna too." Howard heard the woman say, sounding concerned. "When I spoke with her on the phone today I could sense that there was something wrong."

Until now Howard had wanted to avoid involving Jake in something which concerned Anna and Raj, but was now beginning to wonder whether he should call him. "What do you mean?"

"She's looked so pale and exhausted recently... and I've heard her being sick in her bathroom. It's been going on for a couple of weeks now. Call it female intuition, but if I had to guess, I'd say Anna might be pregnant."

With Anna's neighbour's words ringing his ears, Howard took the elevator down to the lobby and was getting into his car when his cell phone rang. It was Bernadette wanting to find out where he was and whether he had managed to talk to Anna. "You'd better get back here. Raj is seriously loosing it."

In the background Howard could hear Raj giving a drunken rendition of Cher's _If I could turn back time_. "Don't worry, I'm on way back."

"Howie, is everything ok?" Bernadette asked, after twenty one years of marriage she could always tell when there was something bothering her husband.

"I really don't know." Howard whispered in reply.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Big Bang Theory. I just love the characters.**

* * *

Howard returned to the Leonard and Penny's house to discover that the party had finished early. With only a handful of guests mingling outside on the terrace and by the swimming pool, the caterers were busily clearing up. Aside from Amy who was trying to prize Sheldon away from the Dolorean, Howard found his friends gathered in the kitchen eating leftover birthday cake.

"Where's Raj?" he asked.

"In there. He passed out." Penny answered, nodding in the direction of the lounge from where Howard could hear snoring. "He is going to have one hell of a hangover come tomorrow." she added speaking with a mouthful of cake.

Taking a seat at the kitchen table beside his wife who had come to the party dressed as Cyndi Lauper, Howard helped himself to a slice of cake.

"So? What happened?" Leonard enquired.

"Nothing. When I got there Anna wasn't home." Howard shrugged.

"Well, I'm gonna call Jake and find out what was so important that she decided not to show up to one of my best friend's birthday party." an infuriated Penny said. With her cell phone in her hand, she was already scrolling through her contacts when Bernadette raised her hand.

"Hang on Penny," she interrupted before turning toward her husband who was hunched over his plate, seemingly in an attempt to avoid eye contact. "There's something you're not telling us, isn't there?" she said, suspiciously.

With a defeated sigh, Howard set down his fork and pushed away his plate. "Like I said when I got to the Anna's apartment she wasn't home, but I did meet her neighbour," he began, "She said that Anna has gone away."

"Gone where?" Penny questioned.

"She didn't know, but.." Howard started and then hesitated for a beat, "She told me that she was concerned about her, she thinks that Anna might be pregnant."

A stunned silence descended upon the friends.

"We should tell Raj." Penny concluded, getting to her feet.

"You can't," Howard said, sounding panicked. "What I mean is it's not that simple. Anna can't be pregnant. It's not possible."

After exchanging a bewildered look with Penny Bernadette said; "What do you mean by its _not_ possible?"

"I mean Raj can't have children," Howard said while experiencing a pang of guilt for revealing what until now had been his best friend's closely guarded secret. "After he and Emily got married they tried to start a family only it didn't happen for them. Eventually they went to a doctor for tests. They discovered that Raj was the reason that they couldn't get pregnant."

"Poor Rajesh."

Everyone looked around simultaneously to see Amy appear in the kitchen doorway. Dressed as Clara Clayton from Back to the Future, she had given up on trying to convince Sheldon that it was time to go home and had heard everything which Howard had said.

"He was devastated. They both were," Howard recalled sadly. "They were just starting to look into fertility treatment when Emily found out that she had cancer."

"So what are we saying? That Anna has been cheating on Raj?" Amy speculated.

"I don't think we should be _saying_ anything," Leonard interjected, sounding irritated. "Seriously guys we have no proof. Besides, how would Raj feel if he knew we were talking about him and Anna like this."

"Leonard's right. The best we thing we can do is forget that I even mentioned this, right?" Howard said, and was relieved by the nodding heads of agreement therafter.

"But what if were true?" Amy persisted, encapsulating their collective thoughts. "What then?"

And for once Howard found himself at a loss for words.

* * *

After the last of the guests had left for home Penny went upstairs to check on Maddie and Bobby, finding them both asleep she passed by Grace's old bedroom and could hear her and Joey watching a late night movie. Returning downstairs to the kitchen she found Leonard checking his phone for what seemed like the hundredth time that evening.

"Sweetie, are you ok?" she asked. She couldn't help but notice how distracted and subdued he'd been over the last few days and she was concerned that he had something on his mind.

"I'm fine," Leonard insisted after hastily switching off and pocketing his phone, "I'm just a little tired. It's been a long day."

"Not too tired I hope."

With a mischievous glint in her eye, Penny took her husband by the hand and led him from the kitchen and into the den.

"Honey, what are you doing?" Leonard asked as he watched her lock the door and turn her attention toward his juke box. Switching it on, she punched the buttons to select her desired track.

"I have been dying to get you out of this outfit all night Hofstadter." She said, huskily.

"Really?" I never knew that you were such a fan of Top Gun," Leonard grinned, "Did you know that to appear taller next to Kelly McGillis Tom Cruise wore lifts in his shoes?"

The juke box clicked as a record dropped into place on the turntable and unable to suppress her passion a moment longer, Penny tugged at the zip of Leonard's flight suit. "Leonard." She breathed as _'_ Take my breath away'began to play.

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

"Copy that."

 **Later..**

Lying breathlessly in each other's arms relaxing in the afterglow of their lovemaking, Leonard brushed a stray hair away from Penny's face. "Well that was fun and also a little unexpected." he admitted. It had been the first time they'd made love since Penny had given birth.

"Yeah, it definitely was." Penny agreed with a blissful faraway look in her eyes. "Sweetie, are you _really_ ok?" she asked again, deciding to make use what was a rare occasion alone to try and encourage her husband into opening up to her. "Are you worried about the kids meeting Lauren?"

"I already said I'm fine," Leonard answered gruffly, scrambling in the dimly lit den for his boxers, he pulled them on in one swift movement. "Can we just drop it?"

"Actually no we can't," Penny said, visibly annoyed by her husband's reluctance to open up to her. "Don't you think that after all these years I can tell when you have something is bothering you?" she persisted.

Leonard hesitated and was about to reply when he was interrupted by a shrill cry coming over the baby monitor. Maddie had awoken for her feed. Hauling herself to her feet, Penny left to go upstairs to the nursery, followed a few minutes later by Leonard.

"Honey I'm sorry," he apologised as he watched Penny breastfeeding their daughter in a rocking chair. "You were right. I'm worried how the kids will take to Lauren. This is a big change for them.. and also I know how mad Grace is at me."

"Grace won't stay mad at you forever," Penny stated knowingly,"And anyway I think she's more disappointed than mad. She's always thought that you had way better taste in women. It was kinda of a blow for her to know that you dated Joy." she said jokingly, managing to elicit a weak smile from Leonard. Somehow she always knew the right thing to say and he loved her for it, but there was something else on his mind. Something he daren't tell. "I don't deserve you." he said.

* * *

Early the following morning with Maddie napping after her feed, Penny slipped on her bathrobe and made her way downstairs. Passing by the kitchen to pour a glass of water and to fetch an aspirin she then headed to the lounge. "Morning Raj," She said, smiling brightly as she drew the window drapes. "How's your head?"

A dishevelled Raj rolled over and opened one eye. "What happened?" he groaned.

"You passed out." Penny answered. Handing Raj the glass, he swallowed the aspirin with a gulp of water.

"I meant before that."

"Oh right, you mean your whole Cher routine?"

By now Raj was getting flashes of memory from the night before.

"Oh no I didn't.." he sighed with his head in his hands.

"What's wrong? Are you wishing you could turn back time?" Penny said, laughing at her own joke. "Honey you're not the first person and I'm sure that you won't be the last to make an ass of themselves on their birthday. I remember on my 21st.."

"Anna didn't show up, did she?" Raj interrupted.

"No, she didn't," Penny responded quietly, feeling sorry for her friend who looked crushed after being stood up by his girlfriend. "Maybe she had to go someplace else."

"Yeah, some place away from me," Raj snorted. "I've screwed up. Let's face it the reason Anna didn't come to my party was because she didn't want to."

"Sweetie, you don't know that." Penny said with a sympathetic smile.

"Don't I?"

Just then Bobby came bounding into the room. He'd found Raj's cell phone outside by the swimming pool, unfortunately Albert had got to it first and so it was a little chewed.

"I'm making French toast, do you want some?" Penny asked as Raj swiped his phone that was still working despite the damage it had sustained. There were no messages from Anna, but a voicemail from an unknown caller.

"No, thank you," he said. The mere thought of food made him feel queasy, "Actually I have to go." he added.

"What right now?" Won't you at least have a cof.."

But before Penny could finish her sentence Raj had disappeared out the door, yelling his apologies over his shoulder.

* * *

After breakfast Penny drove to the supermarket. Encountering several fans as she pushed her trolley around the store, she gladly stopped to sign autographs and to pose for photos. Despite the events of the last month she was stoic in her resolve not to be afraid of being out in public by herself and to put her experience at the hands of Kathy and Noah Keiger behind her. After returning home Penny set about planning the menu for the meal that night.

"You know you could have asked Marlena to help out," Leonard remarked later that afternoon, referring to their long-serving housekeeper who was an excellent cook and had catered for many of the Hofstadter's dinner parties. "Not that I don't love your cooking honey." he added quickly when Penny looked up from stirring a saucepan to glare at him.

"Watch it!" she warned, but then smiled. "You know I don't like to ask her to work at the weekends. Besides, I want to do this. You know, welcome Lauren into the family properly."

At 6pm with dinner in the oven, Penny headed upstairs to take a shower and to get changed into a sparkly crimson top, a pair of jeans and ballerina pumps. After much deliberation and changing his mind several times, Leonard decided upon jeans with loafers and a white linen shirt.

"Sweetie, it's not even seven o'clock yet," Penny said after watching him pace the length of the kitchen several times. "Why don't you pour yourself a glass of wine? Calm your nerves." she suggested.

Leonard had one hand on the refrigerator door when the front door bell rang. Penny waited in the kitchen while her nervous husband went to the door, returning a few minutes later with an equally nervous Lauren. "Lauren, this is my wife Penny." he said as his daughter took off the leather jacket which she wore over a floral print skater dress.

"It's a real pleasure to meet you Mrs Hofstadter." she said, extending her hand toward Penny.

With brown eyes and dark shoulder length curly hair, Lauren bore a striking resemble lance to Leonard.

"Please call me Penny."

With dinner nearly ready Leonard disappeared out of the kitchen in search of Grace and Bobby who were yet to meet their half sister.

"I brought you this," Lauren began, producing a bottle of sauvignon blanc from her tote purse. "Leonard said that you like to drink...I mean not that you drink too much, just that you enjoy a glass of wine." She stammered, her face glowing a bright shade of crimson.

"It's ok I know what you meant," Penny giggled. "And normally I do enjoy a glass of wine or two, but I'm breastfeeding right now."

"Oh, sure. I'm sorry I should have known. I'm sorry I'm so nervous." Lauren apologised while Penny continued to laugh.

"I'm sorry too Lauren I'm not laughing at you," Penny said. "It's just that you remind me of Leonard when we first met. He was so shy back then, he could barely look me in the eye."

"Really?" Lauren said, "I never would have thought that. He's one of the most respected and talented scientists at Caltech."

"I wouldn't let Sheldon hear you say that if I were you." Penny laughed.

"You mean Dr Cooper?"

"Yeah, even though he won a Nobel Prize, he's still pissed that Leonard got tenure and he didn't."

Just then Leonard returned to the kitchen cradling Maddie in his arms and accompanied by Grace, Joey and Bobby. "Guys this is Lauren." he said after introducing everyone in turn.

"Hi." Lauren said, shyly.

Ten minutes later they were all seated around the table in the dining room helping themselves to a meal of roast chicken and potatoes.

"Leonard said that you play guitar," Joey commented in an attempt to break the silence. "Maybe we could have a jamming session next time I'm back in LA." he suggested, his voice trailing off when he caught Grace shooting him a warning glare.

"Thanks, but I'm really not that good," Lauren answered, feeling embarrassed. Leonard had told her that Joey was studying at the Chicago College of Performing Arts while she herself played infrequently during her spare time. "I don't get much time to practice these days."

"Well, maybe I could give you a couple of lessons." Joey offered and winced when he felt Grace kick him in the leg under the table.

"Lauren, how do you like trains?" Bobby piped up.

"Umm not much," Lauren replied. "I recently moved into an apartment near a train track. The trains seem to run all night and they keep me awake." She added.

"Where are you living now?" Penny enquired in a bid to change the topic of conversation from trains so as to avoid any further disappointment for her son who looked crestfallen.

After a particularly ferocious fight with her mother Lauren had decided to move out of home and into a shared apartment with some fellow students. "Really it's not that bad," She insisted after noticing the look of horror on Leonard's face when she told him where she was living. It was a neighbourhood which was known for gang crime. "It's all I can afford right now...and besides it's not like it will be forever. It's just until I complete my master's."

After finishing dessert, Penny told Bobby to go upstairs to get ready for bed while Grace and Joey cleared the dishes away. Alone with his daughter, Leonard took the opportunity to talk about her studies and was impressed to learn that she had been shortlisted for an award.

"I'd better get going soon," Lauren said after realising that it was gone ten."I don't want to miss the last bus."

"No problem I'll give you a ride home," Leonard insisted. He'd only drunk half a glass of wine and so was able to drive. "It means we can talk some more about your work on kinetic absorption models."

A few minutes later Penny returned from upstairs, followed soon after by Joey and Grace who had finished loading the dishwasher and were now have a heated debate as to which of them was the most domesticated.

"It was great to meet you Lauren." Grace said, with a smile which failed to reach her eyes.

While Lauren had largely enjoyed the evening, it had been littered with uneasy exchanges and awkward silences. "Look I know this is difficult, "she began, her gaze dropping to the floor so as to avoid Grace whom she was convinced had taken a dislike to her. "You're probably thinking it would be better if you'd never found out about me."

"Nobody thinks that Lauren," Leonard cut in. "We're happy to have you here."

"Well, I wouldn't blame you. I know you guys have had a really tough year," Lauren began. Penny's kidnap had been all over the news as had Noah' Geiger's failed attempt on her life. "To be honest at first I would have done anything for it not to be true," She admitted. "But now I'm just pleased to have met you. I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't expect you to just accept me into your family, but I really hope something good can come of all this."

Feeling embarrassed, Lauren pulled on her jacket and said goodnight.

"Hey Lauren...Joey and I have got tickets to see The Feels at the Rose Bowl in November," Grace began. She'd noticed that Lauren was wearing the band's button on her jacket and assumed that like them she was also a fan. "Maybe you could come with us...You know if you want." she added with a shrug.

"Thanks, I would like that." Lauren smiled.

By the time Leonard returned home from driving Lauren back to her apartment Penny was sitting up in bed reading through script for the movie in which she was star the following year. She waited while he brushed his teeth before he joined her in the bedroom in his boxer shorts. "Oh, I forgot to tell you I tried calling Raj earlier," she began as Leonard pulled back the comforter and slid into the bed beside her. "He's still not answering. I have to say I'm getting a little worried about him."

"Hmmm." Leonard said, apparently distracted by this own thoughts.

"Sweetie, what is it that's bothering you?" Penny asked, removing her reading glasses and studying his pensive expression.

Driving Lauren back to her apartment Leonard had been disturbed by what they had encountered. A shooting had taken place in her street. According to Lauren it was the third that month, although she had tried her best to play it down.

For almost an hour Penny lay beside her sleepless husband who tossed and turned until she finally sat up and switched on the light."This thing with Lauren is really bothering you, isn't it?" she said.

"Honey, you should have seen the place where she's living. The street outside her apartment is crawling with drunks and gangs," Leonard said, "I think I'll call her to check if she's ok." he decided, reaching for the phone on the nightstand.

"Leonard, it's after midnight she's probably asleep." Penny said, practically.

"You're right. I just wish I could do something," Leonard sighed, "I keep thinking I would _never_ _ever_ let any of our kids live in a place like that. Hell I wouldn't even be happy for Albert to live there." he said of their pet Labrador.

"I wouldn't either," Penny agreed, "But sweetie there is an obvious solution."

"Yeah, what's that?"

"Why don't you ask Lauren to move in here? At least until she's finishes her studies."

"Seriously?" Leonard exclaimed, "You'd be ok with that?"

"Well, it's not like we don't have the room now that Grace is living in Chicago." Penny smiled and felt Leonard slip his hand into hers, squeezing it gently.

"And what about Bobby? Do you think he'll be ok with it?" he asked.

"Bobby will be fine. I'll talk to him."

And so it was decided that Leonard would speak to Lauren the following day at the university."Thank you." he whispered gratefully.

"Do you think she'll say yes?" Penny wondered out loud.

"I really hope so."

* * *

It was gone midnight when Howard heard a car pull up on the drive outside his house. Rising from the bed and putting on his bathrobe, for a moment he wondered whether his son Joey had had a fight with Grace and decided to come home for the night. Descending the stairs, he could hear somebody tapping on the front door.

"I'm sorry did I wake you guys?"

Standing on the porch, his hair and jacket damp from the rain was Raj.

"No, I was still awake," Howard answered, "Where the heck have you been?" he asked as his best friend followed him inside. "Leonard said you ran out on them this morning. We've all been worried about you."

In the kitchen Raj took a seat at the table. "I've been with Anna." he answered.

"Oh, Really?"

Anticipating Raj was about to announce that he and Anna had broken up; Howard braced himself for bad news.

"She's pregnant."

"What?" Howard breathed after a silence. It seemed that Anna's neighbour had been right after all.

"She's been sick. That's why she didn't make it to my party," Raj explained to Howard. "She went to visit an old friend from law school in San Diego. Apparently she passed out in her hallway."

"My God is she ok?"

Raj nodded. "She's doing better. She was dehydrated and ended up having to spend the night in the hospital. Her friend, Rebecca, she tried calling me, only I was drunk and lost my phone," he said, feeling guilty that he hadn't been there for Anna. "I didn't find out until this morning."

Howard got up and walked over to the refrigerator. He couldn't help but wonder why Anna hadn't told Raj before and for why she had gone to visit her friend. "Do you want a beer?" he asked.

"No thanks I'm good. Aren't you going to congratulate me?" a disappointed Raj questioned after Howard had returned to the table holding a bottle of beer. "I just told you that I'm going to be a father."

Howard exhaled. "I thought that you and Emily couldn't..you know that you weren't able to.."

"The baby's mine, ok?" Raj snapped, cutting Howard off mid-sentence.

"Buddy, I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"So what are you saying? That Anna slept with somebody else?" Raj demanded, angrily. "Or maybe you think that she's a gold digger out to trap me for my money."

It was common knowledge that Raj and his siblings stood to inherit handsomely from their exceptionally wealthy parents. It hadn't been the first time that he'd fallen prey to a woman that was only interested in his bank balance.

"No, of course not. Raj, I'm just concerned about you getting hurt." Howard reiterated.

With that Raj got to his feet. He'd changed his mind about having a drink and so went to the refrigerator to retrieve a beer. "Have you ever considered that doctors can be wrong?" he said after taking a swig. "I remember sitting in Emily's doctor's office and him look her in the eye and say that she had a really good chance of beating her cancer. Eighteen months later she was dead. He was wrong. Just like the doctor who told me that I couldn't have kids was wrong."

Howard found himself at a loss for words. It seemed his best friend was unwilling to entertain the possibility that he might not be the father of Anna's baby. "So what are you guys going to do?" he asked.

"I know we've got a lot of stuff to work out," Raj conceded, "But this baby needs a father and I intend to do my best to make it work." He and Anna had only been dating for six months and although he felt ready for a greater level of commitment, sadly he'd come to realise that Anna wasn't. "I notice you _still_ haven't congratulated me," Raj remarked quietly after yet another awkward silence. Having drunk his beer he was now absentmindedly peeling the label off the bottle. "Aren't you happy for me?" he asked, sounding hurt.

"Of course I'm happy for you. It's just a lot to take in. To be honest after what you said last night I thought you were going to tell me that you and Anna had broken up." Howard confessed. "Hang on, I almost forgot I have something for you," he continued. Getting up, he opened a drawer and presented Raj with a gift. "I meant to give it to you last night at the party, but well you know.."

Howard watched Raj tear off the shiny blue wrapping paper to reveal a photo album. "It was Bernie's idea, but all the guys helped to put it together." he explained, smiling proudly.

"Thank you. It's perfect." Raj said. Turning the pages of the album, Raj discovered photographs spanning their thirty year friendship. There were pictures from every Comic-Con and costume party they'd ever gone to together, including the time when whilst on route to Bakersfield Comic-con Leonard had had his car stolen, forcing them to walk for miles in the desert dressed in Star Trek costumes. Raj turned the page to discover a picture of Emily and himself at the high school prom night which his friends had re-created on the roof of their old apartment building in the fall of 2014.

"You know when Emily died part of me died too," he confessed in a choked whisper. "Meeting Anna...well she brought me back to life again. For the first time in years I feel alive... and now I'm going to be a father. I'll have a family of my own. Howard that means everything to me."

And with tears forming in his eyes Howard knew every word to be true. "Congratulations buddy."he said.


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Big Bang Theory I just love (and boy will I miss) these characters :(**

Driving home from work Leonard couldn't stop himself from agonising over how he was going tell Penny about what had happened that day. Parking his car in the garage he caught a glimpse of his troubled self in the rear view mirror. "You're completely over thinking this Hofstadter," he berated himself, "Just go inside and tell her. It'll be fine..it's not that big a deal."

It had been whilst having lunch in the university cafeteria that President Webster had sought Leonard out to tell him about the theoretical physicist who was being seconded from the University of Iowa to collaborate on his latest research project.

"Her name is Dr. Alexandra Jenson. She'll be arriving tomorrow. I trust that you'll show her around? Make sure that she settles in ok?" he had said.

Pausing to take a deep breath, Leonard let himself through the front door to be greeted by Albert, who trotted down the hall wagging his tail excitedly. Taking off his jacket he hung it on the coat stand before making his way to the kitchen where he found Marlena preparing dinner. "Hi Marlena, is that chilli I smell?" he asked.

"Mrs Hofstadter told me that it's your favourite," Marlena said as she stirred a simmering saucepan on the stovetop. "Would you like to try some?" She said, offering Leonard a spoon.

"You know Marlena, I reckon you're the genius around her," he concluded with a boyish grin after tasting the chili. "Is Penny home?"

"She's out by the pool." Marlena answered, smiling contently to herself. The Hofstadter's were by far the nicest family she'd worked for and she loved them all as though they were family.

Venturing outside into the yard, Leonard found Penny seated beside the swimming pool reading a magazine. With winter approaching, there was a slight chill in the air and so she had a shawl draped around her shoulders. "Hey sweetie." She beamed at her husband.

Lowering himself onto the sun lounger beside Penny, Leonard loosened his tie."Where is everybody?" he enquired.

"I just put Maddie down for a nap, Bobby is at a friend's birthday party and Lauren has gone to the library to study." Penny answered before telling him about her day and how she had had lunch with Amy and Bernadette and later had done a yoga workout with Lauren. "You know I'm really loving having Lauren around. She's great company and she's fantastic with Maddie and Bobby." she admitted. Over the last few weeks Penny had grown very fond of Leonard's daughter who had moved into their home while she finished her studies.

"Actually I have some news," Penny started, her green eyes sparkling with excitement. "Something amazing happened today."

"Oh?" Leonard said as he reached for the pitcher of orange juice on the table.

"Barbara my producer called," Penny continued, "She wants me to go to London to do an interview for the show."

"London, England?"

"Leonard this is big," Penny responded, nodding enthusiastically. "It's somebody _really_ famous. She doesn't normally give interviews so it will be an exclusive."

Intrigued, Leonard took a sip of juice. "Can I ask who this _really_ famous somebody is?" he asked.

Feeling torn, Penny chewed on her lower lip. Barbara had asked her not to reveal the identity of the celebrity in question, but she was desperate to tell someone and decided that it would be alright to tell Leonard.

"Meghan Markle. AKA the Duchess of Sussex." She squealed after swearing Leonard to secrecy. Amy and Bernadette had tried their best to tease it out of her over lunch, but she'd refused to tell them.

"You're right that is big," Leonard agreed, "When would you need to leave?"

"That's just it my flight leaves tomorrow afternoon," Penny sighed. Amy had agreed to help out taking care of the kids, but even so she didn't feel entirely comfortable about leaving at such short notice, particularly given that Maddie was still only two months old.

"Ok, it's short notice, but honey obviously you need to do this," Leonard said, practically. Penny hadn't said as much, but he guessed how much of an opportunity the interview represented for her career and for the ratings of her chat show. "It'll only be a few days, right?" he added.

"Thank you," Penny responded, softly. "That means a lot to me."

A few minutes later Marlena came outside to tell them that dinner was ready. In the dining room Leonard and Penny found that she had set the table with flowers and a candle.

"Wow, this chili smells amazing," Penny remarked as Leonard poured himself a glass of red wine and a sparkling water for her.

Taking a sip, Leonard wiped his mouth with his napkin and decided that was no sense in putting off telling Penny about Alex any longer. "Actually honey I have some news myself," he began."Do you remember I told you how I've been finding the latest phase of my latest research a bit challenging? That I really needed some theoretical input?"

"Uh huh."

"Well, as it happens as of tomorrow I will have somebody new working with me."

"That's great sweetie." Penny smiled.

Leonard cleared his throat. "Actually it's somebody you know," he continued, staring down at his plate. "She used to work at Caltech some years ago."

"Well?" Penny shrugged impatiently after Leonard hesitated to respond, "Who is it?"

"It's er... it's Alex Jensen."

"Right," Penny said stiffly after taking a moment to absorb. "And how is _Alex_ these days?" Is she married? Or did she decide to make a career out of hitting on other women's boyfriends?"

Over the years Leonard had read several of Alex's papers, but had never met her in person since her departure from Caltech in the fall of 2013.

"Honey, nothing is going to happen between me and Alex. You must know by now that you're the only women I want."

"Leonard, it's not you I don't trust. It's _her_...Tondelaya Della Ventimiglia." Penny spat out, a sheepish smile forming across her face upon seeing Leonard's blank expression.

"Tondeleya Della who?"

"Ask Sheldon." Penny said, grinning at the memory of Sheldon Cooper's Council of Ladies.

"I don't get it, what has Sheldon got to do with this?"

Reaching across the table, Penny took hold of Leonard's hand. Aside from the news about Alex it had been a pleasant evening and she intended to make the most of the time alone with her husband. "Sweetie, let's not talk anymore about Alex. What do you say we leave the dishes and head upstairs?" she said, suggestively. "Then you can show me exactly how much you want me."

* * *

The following morning Penny woke early to pack for her trip and at 8am Amy arrived to take Bobby to school. Saying goodbye to her two children Penny started to feel apprehensive.

"We'll be fine," Leonard reassured his wife after seeing her eyes fill with tears as she got into the car which was to take her to the airport. "It's only a few days. You'll be back before you know it."

Penny nodded. It was Tuesday and she hoped to be on a flight back by Saturday morning at the latest. "You'll call me if you need me though?" she asked, sounding uncharacteristically panicked. She'd left a list of all the things which Leonard needed to take care of in her absence, including taking Albert to the vet and Bobby to his model train club.

Leonard bent down and kissed Penny through the open car window. "I promise," he said, "Have a great time."

"It's just work. I don't think I'll be dancing the night away at a Mayfair nightclub while I'm there." Penny responded, she was already missing her children and the recent cold snap in London had lessened its appeal.

"What I mean is you don't have to feel bad about being away. This is an amazing opportunity for your career and I want you to enjoy it without feeling guilty."

It was just what Penny needed to hear. "I love you Hofstadter." She whispered.

Penny's journey to the airport took over an hour in the busy LA traffic. After passing through security she made her way to the VIP lounge where she met with her producer Barbara and a two man camera crew. Two hours later she was about to board her flight when her cell phone rang. It was Jeffery, her accountant.

"I'm just about to get on a flight to London," She told him as she proceeded along the jet bridge toward the waiting airplane. It was unusual for him to call unless there was something amiss. "Is there a problem?" she enquired.

"I'm sorry Mrs Hofstadter I didn't realise you were going away on a trip," Jeffery apologised before asking about a substantial sum of money which he'd noticed had recently been withdrawn from the account she shared with Leonard. "Listen, don't worry it's probably a mistake on my part." he concluded after Penny confirmed that she that neither she nor Leonard had withdrawn any money.

After boarding the airplane Penny soon forgot about her conversation with Jeffery, instead she found that she was preoccupied with Alex returning to Caltech that day, and whether she still might have feelings for Leonard. Deciding that she needed a distraction, Penny took out her iPad and began to read the Duchess's autobiography, familiarising herself with her early life growing up in Los Angeles, her acting career and the years thereafter as a member of the British royal family. After eating a light meal, Penny reclined her seat to take a nap. Falling into a deep sleep, she awoke only when a flight attendant roused her to tell her that they had begun their decent into Heathrow. At the airport they were met by a driver who took them to their central London hotel. As soon as Penny was in her room, she phoned Leonard.

"How's London?" he asked. It was after midnight back home and Penny was exhausted after her ten hour flight, but he had insisted on her calling regardless of the hour.

So far Penny's overriding impression of London was of how cold and rainy it was compared with the temperate climate of LA, but as she peered around the window drapes she was excited to see that her room had a view of the Thames and the London Eye. "So, how was your day?" she questioned, with thoughts of Alex.

"Actually we made some really significant progress today," Leonard answered, sounding pleased.

"When you say _we_ I suppose you mean you and Alex." Penny said, flatly.

"Honey, believe me there's nothing for you to worry about. She's completely changed." Leonard said after an uneasy pause.

"How is she changed? Did she get all fat and middle aged?" Penny persisted.

"What I mean to say is she's nothing like the old Alex. She's completely focused on her career. I don't think she even remembered me."

"Oh come on Leonard seriously? Alex doesn't remember the guy she tried to steal away from his girlfriend?" Penny said in disbelief.

"Ok, maybe she does remember me," Leonard conceded, "But I'm sure she's not interested in me in that way." Alex had spoken at length about how her marriage had broken down after her husband had cheated on her. "To be honest I think that relationships are the last thing on her mind." he added.

Over the next few days Penny worked tirelessly with Barbara preparing for the interview, and despite missing Leonard and her children was surprised at how quickly the time passed. On Friday morning a minivan arrived at the hotel to take her and her camera crew to Kensington Palace where the interview was to be filmed. After meeting with the Duchess's private secretary, they were escorted through the palace and via an elevator to a private residence.

"I can't believe this is happening," Penny whispered to Barbara as she surveyed the opulent surroundings of the apartment. "I don't usually get nervous, but I have to say my stomach is doing flip flops right now."

"Don't worry you're a pro, you'll be awesome." Barbara said, with a reassuring smile.

For Penny the next two hours passed in a surreal blur. Later that evening after returning to her hotel she Skyped Leonard at work to tell him about what had been one of the most memorable experiences of her life.

"I'm really proud of you honey." Leonard said after Penny seemed to finally pause to draw breath.

"You know I found her to be such an inspirational woman," she sighed wistfully. Much of the interview had focused on her charities and of her humanitarian work overseas. "She just had this way of putting me totally at ease; it was more like talking to an old friend. She even invited me to call her Meghan off camera."

Despite a promise to herself to remain professional, Penny couldn't resist telling the Duchess how much of a fan she had been of her on the TV show Suits.

"And guess what, she said that she was a fan of my acting work too, can you believe it?"

"Well, I can't wait to see it." Leonard said. The interview was scheduled to be aired early the following year and he was already planning to arrange a celebratory gathering of their friends to watch it.

"And I can't wait to get back home. I've missed you all so much," Penny admitted. The short nature of her trip hadn't afforded her much opportunity to explore London, although she had found time for a shopping trip to Harrods where she had purchased herself a new outfit and some gifts for Leonard and the kids. "Sweetie, are you ok? You look exhausted." she remarked.

"I'm fine. I was working late last night." Leonard said.

Penny was about to ask about Alex when she was interrupted by a knock on her room door. "That must be room service I ordered," she said, "Sweetie, can I call you back later?"

Promising to Skype Leonard later, Penny went to the door in her robe and slippers and was taken aback to find her former co-star Daniel Harrison standing in the hallway.

"Hey there kido." he grinned.

"Oh my God what are you doing here?" Penny screamed.

"Taking you out to dinner."

"You know what I mean," Penny said. "How come you're here in London?"

Daniel had decided to take a break from Matters of the Heart to star in a West End play. "When I heard you were here I just had to come by. So, how about it?"

"How about what?"

"How about going to dinner with me? I have a reservation at Gymkhana. You wouldn't believe the strings I had to pull to get us a table for tonight. "Daniel said of the Indian restaurant in Mayfair which was known for having a waiting list of several months. "I have a driver outside. Afterwards I thought after we could take in some of the sights."

"Oh I don't know Daniel," Penny sighed, she had planned on having a quiet night packing for her flight home followed by going to bed early.

"Oh come on," Daniel said, leaning against the doorway he folded his arms across his chest, "Are you seriously telling me that I got all dressed just to eat alone?"

Penny had almost forgotten just how charming and persuasive Daniel could be when he wanted. "Why is it I can never say no to you Daniel Harrison?" She laughed, with her hands on her hips.

Half an hour later Penny emerged from the elevator in the lobby bar wearing the silk Stella McCartney jumpsuit and a pair of stiletto heels she had purchased at Harrods.

"Is it ok to tell a married woman that she looks sensational?" Daniel asked as he helped Penny on with her pashmina.

"I won't tell if you don't." she said as they made their way outside through a revolving glass door to the waiting car. At the restaurant Daniel ordered a bottle of champagne and for a while Penny talked about her interview that day.

"So, is Leonard taking care of Bobby and Maddie whilst you're away?" Daniel asked after their appetisers had arrived. Penny had ordered the aloo chat and he the duck egg bhurji.

"Leonard is real busy with work so my friend Amy is helping out." Penny told him.

Almost immediately Daniel sensed that there was something bothering her.

"Let's just say I'm uncomfortable with somebody who Leonard is working with right now," Penny confessed after Daniel had asked her if anything was wrong. "She tried to steal him away from me once when we were still dating."

"And you don't trust her?" Daniel enquired, with a look of concern.

"Leonard says that I have nothing to worry about, but the Alex Jensen I remember was devious and calculating...and she had way more in common with Leonard than I did. Back then I couldn't help but feel insecure." she recalled.

Just then the waiter approached the table to replenish their glasses. "Well, if you want my opinion I don't think you have anything to worry about," Daniel began, "So what if she still has eyes for Leonard. As far as I can tell Leonard only has eyes for you. Besides, I don't think anyone in their right mind would mess with your husband. Not unless they were tired of living." he joked, lightening the mood and eliciting a tipsy giggle from Penny. The waiter arrived with their main courses and Daniel ordered a second bottle of champagne.

"Daniel I'm so glad we did this," Penny said, after tasting her food and finding it to be delicious. "Will Clarissa be coming to London?" she asked of Daniel's wife whom she and Leonard also knew well.

Setting down his fork, Daniel hesitated in his reply. "Clarissa is divorcing me." he said, eventually.

"Oh my God Daniel," Penny gasped, extending her hand across the table she touched his hand, "Why ever didn't you tell me this before?" she questioned with a sympathetic look.

"I didn't want to spoil the evening." Daniel answered, honestly.

"Daniel I'm so sorry. And here's me going on about me and Leonard and all the time you must hurting so badly," Penny said, feeling embarrassed. "What happened? Is there somebody else?"

"No, there's nobody else," Daniel answered. "She's just had enough of our life together. All the crazy hours I work. The constant media intrusion. She told me it's like being part of a circus that she never actually signed up for. The kids are devastated. Taylor practically begged me not to go." he said of his teenage daughter.

"You know a while ago Leonard and I went to see a marriage counselor, maybe I could give you her number." Penny offered only for Daniel to shake his head sadly, telling her that they had already tried everything to try and salvage their marriage. Unfortunately divorce was now inevitable.

"Things got really toxic between me and Clarissa, so I decided to come here to London to do this play," he confessed. "Well, that and I just don't care for the direction the show is going in right now."

After finishing their meals Daniel signaled for the waiter to bring the check, and was just reaching in his blazer pocket for his wallet when the maitre d' approached. Speaking in a hushed tone so as not to be overheard by the other diners, he informed Daniel of a gathering of paparazzi in the street outside the restaurant. "Perhaps Sir and Madam would prefer to use an alternative exit." he offered. It wasn't the first time that he'd helped some of his guests to avoid being ambushed by the media.

"Daniel, what's happening?" Penny asked after the maître d' had moved away.

"It seems that we have some unwanted company," Daniel answered, sounding irritated as he signed the check. "Don't worry I'm going to have my driver pick us up."

A few minutes later Daniel and Penny followed the restaurant manager out to the kitchen where they exited through a door into an alley way. "What the hell are they are doing here?" Penny said as they clambered into the back seat of the car which pulled away and turned right, gaining speed as it traveled along Piccadilly. It was then that Penny's cell phone began to ring in her purse.

"Ames? Is everything ok?" she said, instinctively sensed that something was wrong. "Is the kids?..Leonard?"

"Penny I don't know how to tell you this," Amy started in a shaky voice, "Joy's dead."

"Dead? Oh my God when?" Penny gasped.

"She was found at her gym this morning," Amy began. So far the details were sketchy, but the police had apparently discovered signs of there being a struggle in the upstairs office. Joy had been found at the foot of the staircase. "Penny there's something else...Leonard's been arrested."

All at once Penny felt her chest tighten and feared might to be sick. It made no sense. Leonard didn't have it in him to kill a spider, never mind another human being. Quickly her panic turned to Maddie and Bobby.

"Bobby doesn't know yet, "Amy confirmed, although she had no idea what she was going to tell him when Leonard failed to return home from work. "Bernadette is calling Grace and Joey." she added.

"Thank you." Penny whispered gratefully. She would always be thankful for her friends and the way in which they never failed to rally around in a crisis. In the seat beside her, Daniel placed his hand on her shoulder and felt her trembling. By the time she hung up on the call Penny was crying inconsolably.

"I have to get back home," she wept, after telling Daniel about Joy and what had happened to Leonard. "Where are we going?"

Instead of returning to the hotel, their car appeared to be heading away from London along an elevated dual carriageway.

"I think you should come with me to my brother's house," Daniel said. When driving away from the restaurant some of the paparazzi had given chase on motorcycles, causing their driver to swerve dangerously, narrowly avoiding a collision with an oncoming car. It seemed that they were willing to do anything necessary to get a picture of Penny with Daniel. "You'll be safer there."

"But I need to get my passport." Penny protested, her only thought was of getting to the airport and onto the first flight home.

"I'll make a call and arrange for your things to be brought to my brother's place," Daniel reassured. "I promise I'll get you to the airport."

With their car stationary at a junction, Penny and Daniel heard the roar of an approaching motorcycle which pulled up alongside them, its driver proceeding to photograph them in the backseat. Blinded by a succession of camera flashes, Penny buried her face on Daniels's shoulder until the traffic light changed to green and their car was finally able to speed away.

* * *

Parking her car in the street outside the Pasadena police department, Alex weaved her way through the lines of stationary traffic on North Garfield Avenue and ascended the steps leading to the entrance. Striding purposefully toward the front desk, she slammed her purse impatiently on the counter. Poised to take a bite from his sandwich, the officer seated behind the desk looked up from his computer to see a dark-haired lady in a navy pants suit eyeing him with a look of determination."Can I help you Ma'am?" he asked.

"I need to speak to somebody about Dr Leonard Hofstadter. I understand that's he's suspected of being involved in the murder of Joy Anderson."

Saying the words out loud for the first time, Alex realised exactly how crazy it sounded.

"And you are Ma'am?"

"Alex Jenson. Dr. Alex Jenson," Alex replied. Rummaging in her purse, she produced her university ID and placed it on the counter. "I work with Dr Hofstadter at Caltech." She was still reeling with the shock of Barry Kripke ceremonious announcement in the university cafeteria that Leonard had been _'awwested'._ Abandoning her lunch tray, she had driven at speed through the afternoon traffic to get to the police department.

"There's been a mistake," Alex continued breathlessly. "Leonard didn't do this...he couldn't have."

"How so?" the officer enquired.

Having had very little time to figure out exactly what she was going to say, Alex felt her heart beating wildly as she began to speak. "Because I was with Dr Hofstadter at his house...We were together the whole night."


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Big Bang Theory, I just love the characters.**

Penny spent the rest of the journey with her eyes shut and her head resting on Daniel's shoulder. An hour after leaving London their car turned off the main road and proceeded along a wooded driveway, coming to a stop outside a large rustic looking house with timber cladding.

"This is where your brother and sister-in-law live?" Penny said, shivering in the cold. In the rush to get away from the paparazzi she had left her pashmina behind at the restaurant.

"Here put this on," Daniel said, offering Penny his dinner jacket, he guided her towards a set of Portland stone steps leading up to the front door.

"Daniel, is that you?" a male voice who Penny assumed belonged to Daniel's brother called out as they entered inside. "Clare just called to say she's been held up at the Commons again. They're having a late night sitting."

Penny recalled meeting Daniel's brother Michael and his wife at a dinner party some years ago and that he worked for Merrill Lynch, while his British wife Clare was a serving Member of Parliament. Reaching the hallway, Michael stopped mid-sentence as he came to realise that his brother was not alone, but rather accompanied by his former co-star.

"Michael, I believe you've met Penny Hofstadter." Daniel said.

Smiling warmly, Michael extended his hand. Even if he hadn't met Penny in person before, she was one of the biggest stars on television and so was instantly recognisable. "Is everything ok?" he asked her, after noticing that her right hand was shaking as he greeted her.

"We just had a run in with the paparazzi," Daniel explained, still visibly angry. "Some son of a bitch on a motorcycle chased us and almost ran our car off the road. We're both a bit shaken up."

"Can I get you anything? A drink maybe?" Michael offered.

"Actually can I use your phone?" Penny asked, grateful that Daniel had not said anything about Leonard being arrested on suspicion of murder. "My cell phone just died and I really need to call my daughter in Chicago."

"Sure, use the phone in my study," Michael replied, directing her towards an oak door at the end of the hallway. "Take as long as you need."

Leaving Daniel and his brother in the hall, Penny entered into a room with a large mahogany desk and an inglenook fireplace.

"How are you doing kiddo?" Daniel asked after Penny had hung up on her call to Grace, passing her a glass of whiskey he'd poured from his brother's drinks cabinet.

"Leonard didn't do this Daniel," Penny said after taking a sip, her eyes widening as she felt the liquid burn her throat. "I know he was so mad at Joy for keeping Lauren a secret from him and for selling her story...but kill her.. He couldn't."

Daniel nodded his agreement. Despite knowing little about what had happened, he believed Penny when she said it was a mistake and that Leonard was innocent. "Penny, I'm sure it'll be ok. Like you say it's a mistake. Leonard simply isn't capable of hurting somebody. The police will work that out." he said in an effort to reassure his friend. Whilst Penny was on the phone he'd contacted her airline and booked her onto the first flight in the morning. "Why don't you try and get some sleep?" he suggested.

"There's now way I could sleep right now," Penny said, emerging from behind the desk she sat down a tartan print Sherlock chair. "Please Daniel will you stay with me? I don't want to be alone."

For the hours which followed Daniel sat with Penny on the rug beside the fireplace in his brother's study, reminiscing about old times in an effort to distract her from the events of that night. At 4am a car arrived at the house bringing with it Penny's belongings from the hotel. After changing into a pair of jeans and a sweater, she was ready to leave for the airport.

"Why don't you let me come with you to the airport?" Daniel offered after he'd placed Penny's baggage in the trunk and given instructions to the driver as to which terminal she needed to go to.

"Thanks, but I'll be fine. You've already done so much." Penny answered, smiling weakly.

"Are you sure?" a concerned Daniel persisted. He felt uncomfortable with the prospect of her travelling by herself and potentially being accosted by paparazzi again.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

Planting a kiss on Daniel's cheek, Penny slid into the back of the car. "Thank you," She said, smiling gratefully at her friend. "Seriously, I don't know what I would have done without you last night. I don't know what I'd do without you period." she added.

"Hey, what else are TV husband's for?" Daniel said with a boyish grin.

For Penny the journey home was mercifully uneventful. Too tired to contemplate eating, she declined the meal which the flight attendant brought her and after some time fell into a fitful sleep. Upon landing at LAX, she passed swiftly through passport control and into arrivals where she was met by her driver. She had just got into the car when her cell phone rang. It was Bernadette.

"Penny the police have let Leonard go."

At the end of the line Bernadette heard Penny let out an audible sigh of relief, "Thank God." She breathed, her eyes filling with tears of relief. Only after digesting the news did she realise that Leonard hadn't attempted to call her.

"Penny, are you ok?" Bernadette asked.

"Why hasn't Leonard called me?"

Bernadette hesitated."Erm.." she stammered.

"Bernadette? What is it? Tell me." Penny snapped impatiently.

"There's a rumour going around that Leonard was with Alex last night...they're saying that they spent the night together," Bernadette told her, wincing at thought of her friend's reaction. "Like I said it's just a rumour. Personally I don't think it's true." she added quickly.

All at once Penny felt as though she was suffocating. Unable to catch her breath she let her cell phone slip from her hand and onto the seat beside her.

"Mrs Hofstadter, is everything ok?" the driver asked, concerned for his passenger whom he could see crying in his rear view mirror.

In an effort to hide her tears, Penny turned her head to stare out the window at the rain soaked streets of Los Angeles. "Please just take me home." she said.

* * *

Leonard's hand trembled almost uncontrollably as he unlocked the front door at home and stepped inside. Making his way into his study he was stunned by what he discovered. After obtaining a warrant, the police had searched the house, leaving it looking as though it had been ransacked by burglars. Everywhere furniture was out of place and drawers had been left open, the contents turned out onto the floor.

"Dr Hofstadter?"

Startled, Leonard turned abruptly to see Marlena behind him wearing a damp raincoat, an umbrella in her hand.

"I thought you might need my help." She said in dismay as she surveyed the chaotic scene the police had left in their wake.

Ghostly pale and with dark circles beneath his eyes, Leonard had the appearance of someone who hadn't slept or eaten in days. "I don't want Penny and the kids to see the house like this." He told her.

"You should get some rest Dr Hofstadter," a concerned Marlena said, taking off her raincoat. "I can clear up before Mrs Hofstadter comes home."

Taking out his cell phone, once more Leonard attempted to call Lauren only for his call to go straight to voicemail. After leaving a message, imploring her to call him back, he hung up. Looking up he saw Penny standing in the doorway with her suitcase.

"You're home.. I didn't think you'd be back until tonight. "

"I got an earlier flight."

"I'm sorry I didn't want you to see this.." Leonard apologised.

Sensing their need for privacy, Marlena left the room leaving Leonard and Penny alone and staring at each other from across the room.

"Where are the kids?" Penny questioned.

"They're with Amy and Sheldon. They're ok," Leonard answered, sounding drained. "Bobby thinks that I'm working."

Moving towards her husband, Penny resisted the instinctive urge to draw him into her arms. "Is is true?" she asked, curtly.

"Is what true?"

"That you were with Alex last night? That you spent the night here together in our home?"

Leonard's gaze dropped to the floor. He had rather hoped to explain everything to his wife himself, but somehow she had found out herself. "Yes," he answered solemnly. "Penny, all I ask is that you hear me out. Believe me it's not like it seems." he stammered.

Penny lowered herself onto the couch by the window. "I'm listening." She said, wearily.

"I was here alone. The kids were with Sheldon and Amy and Lauren was staying with a friend. I was working when there was a knock at the door," Leonard began, "It was Alex. She had just found out that her ex-husband was getting married again. She was really upset. Broken in fact."

Penny rolled her eyes. "So she came running straight here to cry on your shoulder?" she stated, her voice dripping with contempt. "I bet she knew that you were alone."

"I guess we just we lost track of time. It got late. Alex had had a lot to drink so I thought it would be best for her to stay the night." Leonard recalled.

"Why not just call her a cab?" Penny interrupted, sounding irritated.

"Honey, you didn't see how she was. I couldn't let her go. I was afraid what she might do."

"Oh please!" Penny snorted. "Afraid of what exactly?"

"She told me that she'd been in a really dark place..that she'd even thought about taking her own life." Leonard confided. "Penny, I know that you don't trust Alex and that you think was an act to try and get me into bed or something, but it wasn't like that. Honestly I think she just needed somebody to talk to."

"And now she's provided you with an alibi for murder which conveniently makes it look as though you're having an affair." Penny said of the women she was convinced was trying to steal her husband despite Leonard's protestations to the contrary.

Walking slowly over to his desk Leonard picked up a picture frame that had been lying face down. It was a recent family photograph taken on a weekend trip to Lake Tahoe, the first to include Lauren. "This isn't over Penny," he said, seriously, "Joy is dead and the police think that I did it."

"Sweetie, the police let you go," Penny interjected, "They made a mistake."

Sadly Leonard knew that his ordeal was far from over. "Only because they don't have enough evidence to hold me right now," he said. While being interviewed he'd come to learn that the CCTV at the gym hadn't been recording. With no other witnesses, Alex's testimony was the only thing that was keeping him out of jail.

Emerging from behind his desk, he moved towards Penny on the couch. "There's something you need to know...Joy was blackmailing me," he confessed, "She wanted money...and revenge."

"What do you mean she wanted revenge? Revenge for what?" a shocked and exasperated Penny demanded.

"For the way I treated her back when we were dating. Back then I really thought that we were both on the same page, that we were just having a bit of fun. That it wasn't anything serious. Only apparently Joy didn't see it that way. She thought I led her on."

"So she blackmailed you?"

Leonard went onto explain how Joy's gym had been on the verge of financial ruin and how her blackmailing had begun with a threat to sabotage Howard's chances of getting the much sought after engineering position at NASA. "She was going to tell them about the time he crashed the Mars rover," Leonard said, "I couldn't let that happen. It was me that told her all those years ago," he admitted, "I thought if I gave her the money it would be over."

"Only it wasn't over, was it?" Penny sensed, somehow she knew that there was more.

"Joy started digging up stuff about our past. Somebody at the university told her about that asshole David Underhill and how you dated him. She tracked him down."

Penny had met the experimental physicist Dr David Underhill in the winter of 2008 whilst he had been working with Leonard at Cal Tech. Their short lived relationship had however ended as quickly as it had begun after Penny had discovered that he was cheating on his wife. In the years that had followed David Underhill's standing as an eminent scientist had been damaged irreparably after he had been expelled from the university for getting one of his undergrad students pregnant. Unsurprisingly his then wife filed for a divorce.

"That son of a bitch didn't delete the nude pictures he took of you on his phone. He kept them! It seems he was only too happy to pass them onto Joy for his share of the money. She even emailed them to me just to let me know how serious she was about putting them on the internet if I didn't payout." Leonard recalled with disgust.

Listening to her husband recount the events of the last few weeks Penny felt nauseous. "I just don't understand why you'd let Joy do this to us. Why didn't you go the police?" she asked.

"After everything you've been through I just wanted to protect you and the kids." he answered truthfully, although he now realised that he'd made a terrible mistake with potentially life changing consequences.

"So what do we do now?" Penny said.

Leonard shook his head. "I wish I knew."

* * *

Across Pasadena Jake was in a bar. After his first week back at work some of his fellow EMTs had persuaded him to join them for a drink after his shift. He had just brought a round of beers and was handing his money to the bartender, when he caught sight of a girl seated at the end of the bar with her head resting in her hands. Excusing himself, Jake moved away from his co-workers.

"Lauren?" he said as he approached.

Slowly Lauren looked up from nursing a glass of vodka to reveal swollen and blood shot eyes.

"I know we haven't met before, but I'm Jake Cunningham. I'm a friend of Leonard and Penny's," Jake began, cautiously, he could see that Lauren was very drunk and wasn't sure how she might react to being approached by a stranger. "I was also a friend of your Mom's. I'm so sorry."

Letting out an indignant snort, Lauren gulped down her drink and signalled to the bartender for another.

"Maybe that isn't such a good idea," Jake remarked, with instinctive fatherly concern. "Why don't you let me drive you home?" he offered.

"No thanks I'm fine." Lauren slurred before lifting the replenished glass to her lips and taking a gulp.

"You don't look fine to me. Lauren, why don't you at least let me call somebody for you?" Jake persisted, with a look of concern.

"Did you not hear me? I said no!" Lauren yelled, angrily, downing her drink and slamming the glass on the bar.

Pulling up a stool, Jake positioned himself beside Lauren and ordered a beer. "You don't mind if I join you, do you?," he asked, "You know I have a daughter, Anna, she's a bit older than you," he continued before affording Lauren the opportunity to object. "If anything like this were to happen to her I would hate to think of her being alone with nobody to look out for her."

"I don't need _you_ to look out for me." Lauren said, defiantly.

"Well all the same I think I'll stick around for a bit in case you change your mind." Taking a swig of beer, Jake saw Lauren retch and then cup her hand over her mouth. "Maybe we should get you outside for some air."

With his arm around her waist, Jake guided Lauren through the crowded bar and out into the street where she promptly fell to her knees and vomited on the sidewalk.

"Jake, is everything alright buddy?"

Jake turned to see a familiar face standing behind him. In his early twenties, Jesse had recently begun working shifts as an EMT whilst studying at medical school. With his help, Jake lifted a semi-conscious Lauren into the passenger seat of his nearby car. "What's going on?" Jesse asked.

Jake didn't have the time or inclination to try and explain what was a complicated situation. "Just tell the guys that something came up and I had to leave." he said before steering his car into the traffic, leaving a bemused Jesse behind on the sidewalk.

By the time Jake had parked his car on the driveway outside his home Lauren had begun to stir awake.

"Where am I?" she groaned. The drive had afforded her sufficient time to begin to sober up, rewarding her with a throbbing head.

"At my place," Jake answered, nodding in the direction of his front porch that was illuminated by a security light. "Frankly leaving you in that bar by yourself was not an an option. Lauren, I don't know if you've heard, but the police let Leonard go," Jake continued after taking a moment to consider whether to bring up his arrest. "Why don't you call him? I'm sure he and Penny are worried about you."

Blinking back tears Lauren insisted that she wasn't ready to talk to Leonard. "My heads a mess right now...I really don't know what to say to him." she admitted.

Jake concluded that there was no sense in trying to change Lauren's mind and cautiously offered her his spare room for the night on the condition that she permitted him to call Leonard. Silently nodding her agreement, Lauren got out of the car and followed Jake into the house where he fetched her glass of water and an aspirin from the kitchen, returning to the lounge he discovered that Lauren had already fallen asleep on the couch. Taking out his cell phone, he headed into the hall, closing the lounge door behind him.

"Lauren? Is that you?" Leonard said. Answering the phone almost the second it began to ring, he sounded like someone who was desperate and close to breaking point.

"Leonard it's Jake," Jake said. "I thought you should know that Lauren is here with me at my place," he continued. "She's in pretty bad shape. I found her drinking in a bar. I think she's in shock."

"I'll come get her." an enormously relieved Leonard responded. Out of the corner of his eye saw Penny mouthing the words _'who is it?'_ and replied that it was Jake.

"Actually I don't think that's such a great idea," Jake cut in, "Lauren says she doesn't feel ready to come home tonight. She wants some space to work things out."

"Jake, I don't think you understand I _really_ need to speak to her," Leonard protested, "I need her to know that I didn't have anything to do with what happened to her Mom."

Reaching into the pocket of his jacket hanging in the hall, Jake pulled out a silver key ring shaped into the letters L&P that had been in his possession since he'd found it on the floor of Joy's gym.

"Jake?" Leonard prompted after a prolonged silence. "Lauren, doesn't think that it was me, does she?" he demanded.

Staring down at the key ring glimmering in the palm of his hand, Jake knew for certain that it belonged to Leonard, a gift given to him by Penny many years ago before they were married. Making his way into the yard he opened the trash can and tossed it in.


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Big Bang Theory. I just love and am inspired by the characters.**

"Well?" Penny said questioningly after Leonard had eventually hung up on his phone call to Jake.

"Lauren's at Jake's house. She doesn't want to come home." he answered quietly while staring distraughtly at the phone in his hand. "I have to talk to her. I'm going to drive over there."

"Sweetie, it's late," Penny said as she watched her husband fumble about on the cluttered kitchen island in an effort to locate his car key. "I really don't think that going over there tonight is such a great idea."

"Maybe not, but I need her to know that I'm here for her," Leonard responded as he continued to search for the misplaced key, eventually finding it beneath a copy of Scientific American. "Also, I need to know that she doesn't think that I had something to do with Joy's murder."

"Oh sweetie, I'm sure that Lauren isn't thinking that." Penny soothed.

"Really? So why is she staying away? She doesn't even know Jake."

"Lauren just lost her mom. It's reasonable to assume that she's won't be thinking straight right now, but that doesn't mean that she thinks that you were responsible," Penny said, practically. "I'm sure Jake will take care of her tonight. Why don't we go to bed and tomorrow we'll drive over there to talk to her?" she suggested.

It was getting late. In the intervening hours Sheldon and Amy had brought Bobby and Maddie home, mercifully they were both now asleep, oblivious to their parent's troubles.

Leonard nodded wearily. He hadn't slept for more than a few hours in the last two days and yet knew that sleep was unlikely to come easily that night. "Why don't you head on upstairs and check on the kids? I'll be up shortly." he said.

After switching off the lounge light, Leonard wandered into the hall and was about to climb the stairs when he heard footsteps approaching the house on the driveway outside. Fearing that it was a trespassing reporter, he opened the front door to find Alex standing in the rain.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" Leonard whispered. His words muffled by a rumble of thunder.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?" Alex asked, the short walk from her car had left her soaked to the skin. "I really need to talk to you."

"Actually this isn't a good time," Leonard said sternly, angry that Alex had deemed it appropriate to show up at his house knowing that Penny was due home from her trip that evening.

"Please Leonard it's important." Alex pleaded.

Reluctantly Leonard moved to one side of the door, allowing Alex to enter into the hallway. "Well?" he demanded impatiently whist listening out for Penny upstairs in the nursery. The last thing he wanted was for her to discover Alex in their home.

"You look tired Leonard," Alex observed.

"Yeah, well the twenty-four hours I just spent holed up in police custody wasn't exactly a relaxing way to pass the time," Leonard responded, curtly. "So? Why have you come here?"

"I can't stop thinking about what I've done. Leonard, I've never even had as a much as a speeding ticket ...and yet now I've lied to the police in a murder enquiry," Alex began, her eyes wide and fearful. "We have to make sure that they believe us."

Studying Alex's distraught expression, Leonard had a distinct sense of unease as to what she might say next. "And what exactly does that mean?" he questioned, folding his arms across his chest.

"'I...I think that you should move out." Alex answered in a shaky voice, "And that we should make out like we're together."

Concealing herself in the shadows at the top of the stairs, Penny took a sharp intake of breath and grabbed at the banister.

For a moment Leonard could do nothing but stare at Alex in disbelief. "Listen to me there's no way in this world that I'm going to cause my wife and children any more hurt by walking out on them." he said slowly.

"What if the police find out that I lied? You could go to jail and I could be charged with perverting the course of justice, "Alex said, "We could literally lose everything."

"Alex, I never asked you to lie for me," Leonard said, tersely, "I certainly never asked you to invent a story about us sleeping together. I mean why the hell would I do that?" he demanded angrily, "I love Penny. We just had a baby for Christ sake."

Hurt, Alex looked away. "Leonard, I had to do something. I couldn't just leave you there in a police cell," she defended sounding like a child that had just been sent to its room. "I care about you too much. I always have. Besides, you wouldn't be hurting Penny and your family, if anything you would be protecting them from what could happen if the police find out the truth."

"I think you should leave Alex now." Leonard said, coldly, "I really have nothing more to say. And I'd ask you _not_ to come back here again."

"Won't you at least think about it?" Alex said with a tone of desperation, "Is it really so crazy that we could have feelings for each other?" she asked. She had always held the belief that Leonard and Penny were ill suited. As far as she could see they had nothing common. "Well, is it?" she persisted.

"Alex, you need to understand that there was never anything between us, nor will there ever be." Leonard said.

Turning towards the door, Alex hesitated as she recalled first meeting Leonard in the fall of 2012 after taking a job as Sheldon's assistant, and how she had been instantly attracted to him. "You're wrong when you say that there was never anything between us," she started, "You loved every second of my flirting with you. The only reason you didn't act upon it was out of some misplaced loyalty to Penny. We were so much better suited than you ever were. You just chose not to see it."

And with that Leonard closed the door.

* * *

The following day Leonard took Penny's car to drive the short distance to Jake's house. His own car was still in the possession of the police who had taken it away for forensic examination. The only consolation was that he knew that there no possibility of them finding any evidence linking him to Joy's murder.

"How's she doing?" a concerned Leonard asked as he followed Jake inside the house and along the hallway.

"She's upstairs," Jake began, "I took her up some breakfast earlier, but I couldn't get a word out of her."

Leonard found Lauren in what had once been Anna's bedroom while she was attending UCLA. Laid on the bed facing the wall, he noticed that the toast and coffee which Jake had brought to her was still untouched on the nightstand.

"Lauren, sweetheart it's Leonard. Are you awake?" he asked softly.

"What do you want?" Lauren groaned. Her head was pounding from the effects of the alcohol, and she had no inclination to talk to her father, wanting instead to close her eyes and fall back to sleep in the hope that when she awoke it might all prove to be a bad dream.

Tentatively, Leonard perched himself on the end of the bed. "Lauren, I'm so incredibly sorry about your mom," he began, " I want you to know that you're not alone. Myself and Penny we're both here for you. We're going to help you through this." he reassured her. Once Joy's body was released by the police arrangements would need to be made for the funeral, and although Lauren was mature beyond her years, he couldn't imagine somebody so young having to bury their own mother without the support of another parent. "Sweetheart, why don't you come home with me?" Leonard continued, only to be met with silence. "Listen, I need you to know that despite what the police might think, I didn't have anything to do with what happened to your Mom. I know Joy and I weren't exactly friends, but I would never hurt her. Believe me I could never hurt anyone." He defended, honestly.

"I don't think you did it," Lauren answered, her voice muffled by the pillow, "I'm just not ready to come home. I hope you can understand that."

"Where will you go?" Leonard questioned, panicked by the thought of her returning to the shared apartment where she had lived before moving in with them.

Lauren shrugged her shoulders. "I'll figure something out." She said.

Realising that there was little point in trying to convince Lauren otherwise, and feeling as though in some way he had failed her, Leonard returned downstairs to find Jake in the lounge.

"Here, drink this," Jake said, passing Leonard a cup of strong freshly brewed coffee. Leonard gave a nod of thanks.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but you look like crap." Jake added as Leonard took a sip.

"I feel like crap. Lauren says she doesn't want to come home and I have no idea where she will go."

"What about her father?" Jake enquired.

"She hasn't spoken to him in months. I tried calling him, but according to his new girlfriend he's away on business. My fear is she'll end up going back to the hell hole of an apartment that she was living in before she came to stay with us."

Jake set his empty cup down on the table."Well, she's welcome to stay here." he offered.

"Really?"

"Sure, I have a few days before I need to go back to work. I'm happy to keep an eye on her, provided Lauren is ok with it of course."

It wasn't exactly the outcome which Leonard had wanted, but Lauren staying with Jake was certainly preferable to any of the alternatives which came to mind.

"How's Penny doing?" Jake asked, "I heard that she was in London when you got arrested."

"She's scared. We both are." Leonard answered honestly.

"Leonard, there's something I need to tell you," Jake began, his face matching the seriousness of the tone of his voice. "I was there yesterday morning at the gym when Joy's body was discovered. It was me that responded to the 911 call."

Leonard felt his chest tighten as the image of Joy's body lying broken and lifeless at the foot of the wrought iron staircase flashed through his mind's eye.

"I found something," Jake continued, and saw Leonard flinch. "Something I know belongs to you. There was a keying beside Joy's body. I know I shouldn't have, but when I saw it there I picked it up."

"Did you give it to the police?" Leonard asked in a shaky voice.

Jake shook his head. He couldn't explain his action, it was an impulsive decision, driven only by an instinct that Leonard wasn't responsible, despite irrefutable evidence which linked him directly to the scene of the crime.

"Forgive me Leonard, but I have to ask.."

"I didn't do it," Leonard interrupted, abruptly. "I know how it must look, but believe me I had nothing to do with what happened to Joy."

"But you _were_ there at the gym?" Jake pressed. There didn't appear to be any other explanation as to how the key ring had come to be on the floor.

Uneasy, Leonard turned around to face the wall, noticing then the shelf of books on pregnancy and childbirth. For a while he'd almost forgotten about Jake's other occupation as a doula.

"Joy was blackmailing me," he confessed, ashamed to admit that he had allowed Joy to manipulate him into giving her money. "And yeah, I was at the gym the night she died handing over what I swore to her was going to be the last money she was going to get out of me. I must have dropped the key ring then. When I left she was still alive."

"So that's why the police think that you were involved." Jake surmised.

Leonard nodded.

"I have a motive to want Joy dead. I don't think they're going to stop until they find a way of pinning her murder on me."

Lost for words and feeling nothing but sympathy for his friend, Jake offered to come over to the house later that day to collect Lauren's belongings.

"You know I never thanked you properly for what you did for Penny," Leonard said seriously, "You saved her life. Had you not done what you did I would be standing here having lost the love of my life."

"Anybody would have done the same." Jake dismissed. Despite seeing a therapist, he still found it difficult to talk about the attempt on Penny's life, and how he himself had been shot protecting her.

"I doubt that. You were nearly killed." Leonard said pointedly.

Jake wanted to say that he'd do it all over again in a heartbeat, but knew that he couldn't. He'd have laid down his life to save Penny if he'd had to.

"You're a good friend Jake. I for one will never forget what you did." Leonard added as he stepped outside onto the porch.

Jake nodded. "I'll talk to Lauren." he promised.

* * *

It was early afternoon and Anna was at her office. With Raj staying at her apartment over the weekend, she'd found it impossible to catch up with the work which had built up during her period of absence. He had spent much of the morning trying to convince her to go out for brunch followed by a shopping trip for the baby. In the end Anna had made her excuses and escaped to the office, promising to return by the evening for the meal which Raj was insistent on cooking.

"Anna?"

Anna peered over her laptop screen to see Arjun, a fellow lawyer hovering in the doorway. Dressed in casual weekend attire of jeans and a sweater, he greeted her with a toothy smile. A few years older than herself, Arjun had studied law at Oxford before taking his Juris Doctor degree and moving to the U.S to practice law. In recent months he'd announced his intention to return to the UK to get married.

Arjun ventured into the office and perched himself on the edge of the desk beside a stack of files. "How are you?" he asked, "I heard you were sick."

Unfortunately the office where they worked was known for being a hive of gossip, and Arjun was conscious of seeming as though he was prying into his co-worker's personal life, rather than asking out of genuine concern. He'd also heard how she was dating someone considerably older than herself, apparently an astrophysicist at Caltech and a friend of the actress Penny Hofstadter.

"It was just a bout of food poisoning. I'm fine now." Anna responded, dismissively and took a sip of the herbal tea which Raj had encouraged her to drink instead of her usual coffee.

"Well, I'm glad to hear it."

Arjun guessed Anna was behind with her work, hence the reason for putting in extra hours on a Sunday. Having only qualified the year before, and as the youngest lawyer at the firm, she was always striving to impress her bosses and to prove herself capable of taking on challenging cases.

"So how come you're here?" Anna questioned as she continued to type.

"My parents are visiting from England. Let's just say there's only so much wedding talk I can take in one weekend. My mother has completely taken over. I told her something important had come up."

"So you came here to escape." Anna smiled, knowingly.

"Guilty as charged." Arjun chimed. "I don't suppose you fancy taking a break to grab some lunch?" he suggested.

Whilst talking the office janitor arrived with a delivery for Anna which he said had just arrived at reception.

"I'm sorry I can't. I promised Raj I'd be home by 6pm for dinner." Anna apologised as she set about tearing open the box which the janitor had left behind.

Arjun was about to leave when an assortment of pink and blue helium balloons floated out from the box.

"Does this mean what I think it does?" he asked in after being stunned into silence for a moment. The balloons were now bobbing along the ceiling, each bearing the words _'Mom to Be!'_

"Shit." Anna cursed under her breath. Thanks to Raj and his ill considered gesture her secret was out. "Yes, it's true. I'm pregnant," she confessed.

"Are you.."

"Yes," Anna interrupted, "I'm having the baby." She answered, pre-empting Arjun's question. "Listen, I haven't told anybody here at work yet, so I'd be really grateful if we could keep this between us." She added with pleading eyes.

Still in shock, Arjun nodded his agreement. "How did your boyfriend take the news?"

Anna moved over to the coffee machine in the corner of her office, disregarding Raj's advice she poured herself a cup of coffee. "He's ecstatic," she replied, "It's all he talks about. I can barely move in my apartment all the stuffed toys and baby clothes that he's brought."

"And what about you? Are you happy?" Arjun asked, surprising himself with the boldness of his question. For him Anna was far more than just a co-worker, she was a friend.

Anna looked away. Things were moving fast with Raj. In the last week he had practically moved into her apartment, and she feared that a marriage proposal was looming in the not too distant future. The truth was she wasn't ready to get married.

"I'm sorry," Arjun apologised, "It's none of my business." He conceded.

Just then the phone on Anna's desk began to ring. It was Raj calling to find out whether the balloons had been delivered, and to check that she would still be home for dinner. With a concerted effort to conceal her anger, Anna confirmed her intention to leave work by 5:30pm. By the time she hung up Arjun was gone.

* * *

At 6pm Jake drove over to Leonard and Penny's house. Passing by the media camped out at the end of the street; he spoke to Penny over the intercom before passing through the electric gate and onto the driveway.

"How's Lauren doing?" Penny asked upon answering the front door.

Several weeks had passed since Jake had last seen her, and even though she looked tired, was without makeup and dressed in sweatpants and an old t-shirt, to him she still radiated a beauty which took his breath away.

The police came and took a statement. She said she was studying with a friend all evening," Jake told her, "She was sleeping when I left. How about Leonard?" he enquired.

"He's sleeping too." Penny answered. By the time he'd returned home after visiting Lauren he'd been fit to drop with exhaustion. After a good deal of persuasion Leonard has finally agreed to go upstairs to lie down.

From just inside the doorway Penny handed Jake a holdall which she herself had packed herself with Lauren's belongings. "Would you like to come inside?" she offered.

"No, thank you. I think I should get back." Jake answered.

There was awkwardness about their encounter which Penny couldn't help but pick up on. "Have you been avoiding me Jake?" she asked, nervously.

"No, of course not. I just.."

"Because I wouldn't blame you if you were," Penny interrupted, "I guess being around me is just a reminder of what happened that day in the hospital parking lot."

"I'm doing ok Penny," Jake reassured her. He saw no sense in telling her truth that he was still plagued by flashbacks and nightmares. Mercifully the man who had shot him, Noah Geiger, had pleaded guilty to the charges levied against him meaning that Jake and Penny would be spared the trauma of giving evidence in a trial.

"I'm not avoiding you Penny," Jake promised, at same time hating himself for lying to her. Keeping his distance was the only thing which allowed him to get on with his life.

Just then they were interrupted by the buzz of the intercom. It was the police returning for Leonard.

"What do they want?" Jake questioned as he and Penny watched two vehicles pull up onto the driveway with their lights flashing. A plain clothes detective emerged from the first car and flashed his badge at a terrified Penny.

"I'm Detective McKlusky from the L.A Police Department. I'm heading up the investigation into the murder of Joy Harris." He said, sternly, "Is your husband home Mrs Hofstadter?"

Rendered speechless with shock, Penny nodded. "He's upstairs." She managed to utter.

"What the hell is going on?" Jake demanded.

"We found traces of the victim's blood in Dr Hofstadter's car," Detective McKlusky replied, matter of factly. "I'm afraid we're going to have to arrest him and take him into custody for further questioning."

Penny watched in horror as two uniformed officers hurried upstairs, headed for their bedroom, returning moments later with Leonard in handcuffs.

"Leonard!" she shrieked in panic as they escorted her husband down the stairs and into the hallway. The room was beginning to spin, and she feared she might pass out.

Despite the fear visible in his eyes, outwardly somehow Leonard appeared calm. "Honey, it'll be ok." he whispered.

"I love you!" Penny yelled as she watched Leonard being frogmarched out of the house and toward the waiting police car.

"I love you too," Leonard mouthed.


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Big Bang Theory. I just love (and really miss) the characters.**

Watching the police car pulling away from the house with its lights flashing and her husband handcuffed on the back seat, Penny felt limp and nauseous.

"Oh my God this can't be happening," She said, drawing a shallow raspy breath. "I...I have to call Leonard's lawyer."

Turning abruptly, Penny made toward Leonard's study in search of the lawyer's business card.

"Penny, you just had a terrible shock. Why don't you let me take care of this?" Jake offered as he trailed her into a room that was still in disarray after being searched by the police.

Ignoring Jake's advice thereafter to rest up for a while, Penny froze, her eyes fixed upon Leonard's laptop partially buried beneath a pile of papers.

"The security camera. It will prove that Leonard didn't leave the house on the night Joy was killed." she declared triumphantly.

Taking a seat at the desk, Penny opened the laptop and after a few failed attempts, entered the correct password.

"I don't understand…it's not here." she uttered a moment later.

"What do you mean it's not there?" Jake questioned as Penny tapped furiously at the keyboard in frustration. The archive footage from Friday night which should have been stored on the laptop was gone.

"It makes no sense. It should be recording the whole time. Somebody must have deleted the footage…or tampered with the camera."

Jake shook his head in disbelief. "Why would anybody do that?"

Penny didn't reply. Instead she got up and headed out into the hallway.

"Penny, what are you doing?" Jake asked after finding his friend hurriedly zipping up her jacket.

"I need you to watch the kids for a while." She said after reaching into the hall closet and putting on her Cornhuskers baseball cap.

"Can I ask where you are you going?" Jake responded with a worried expression.

"I need to speak with Alex." Penny replied. Before leaving for London, she recalled Leonard mention in passing that Alex was to be staying at the Greentree Inn in Alhambra for a few days whilst waiting to move into her apartment.

"Penny, you should know that I'll do anything to help you and Leonard, but do you really think confronting Alex is such a good idea? Shouldn't you let the police handle it?" Jake reasoned.

Ignoring Jake, Penny stepped toward the front door with an air of determination that told him that nothing was going to deter her from going after Alex in search of the truth.

"Yeah sure, because so far the police have done such a terrific job," she responded sarcastically. "Somebody is trying to frame my husband for murder and Alex was the only other person in this house that night."

"But she gave Leonard an alibi. Surely she wanted to protect him." Jake cut in.

"I still don't trust her."

"Ok, you could be right." Jake conceded. "But what makes you think that Alex will speak to you?" From what he'd learnt from his conversation with Leonard earlier that day there was certainly no love lost between the two women. "Besides, you have no proof. You could well make things worse." he cautioned.

"I don't need proof." Penny responded defiantly.

"Ok, well consider this. The streets are crawling with paparazzi who will literally do anything to get a picture of you. What if one of them follows you? Have you any idea what danger you could be putting yourself in?" Jake said, sounding panicked. "I can't let you do it. I can't risk you getting hurt."

Had it not been for her recent experience of almost being run off the road by paparazzi in London, Penny would have dismissed Jake's concerns as an overreaction. As it was she knew he was right. It wasn't safe to go out, and if discovered there was every chance her actions would make matters worse. For Jake it was the closest he'd ever come to revealing his feelings for her.

Penny dropped her purse and let out a defeated sigh."Then what can I do?" she said in sad desperation. "I can't just sit here and do nothing while my husband could go to jail."

"I'll go. I'll speak to Alex."

"You don't even know her." Penny objected.

"Well, maybe that could work in my favour." Jake said."It's worth a try though, isn't it?"

* * *

Twenty minutes later Jake parked his car in the lot at the Greentree Inn. Ascending a staircase onto a balcony walkway whilst keeping an eye out for anybody whom might have followed him, he made quickly towards Alex's room. Knocking twice, he waited for some time, and was just about to give up when he heard the door unlock.

"Can I help you?"

Standing with the door half open was a middle-aged woman with dark shoulder length hair. Bleary eyed and wearing a crumpled shirt and jeans, she looked as though she'd just woken up.

"Dr Jenson?"

Alex gave a small cautious nod.

"Are you with the police?" she asked.

"No, my name is Jake Cunningham. I'm a friend of Leonard and Penny's," Jake began to explain. "Actually, I'm an EMT with the fire department. I'm also a certified doula with DOLA International." he added, hoping that his professional credentials would assure her of his trustworthiness.

Alex tensed and eyed Jake with suspicion as he reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and produced his ID badge.

"Look, I'm sorry to come by like this, but I really need to speak with you." he apologised. In the room behind Alex he could see a white board on which they were handwritten equations, none of which made the slightest bit of sense to him.

Alex examined the picture on the ID and then looked at Jake.

"I know what you've thinking. You never met a guy doula before." Jake said as he tucked his ID into his pocket. "If I had a dollar for every time I'd had someone say that, I'd be a very wealthy man." He added eliciting a smile from Alex who seemed a little more relaxed than a few moments before.

"Come in." She said.

Grateful not to have been turned away, Jake followed Alex into the room with a king sized bed and decorated in neutral colours. On the wall was a canvas print of the Pasadena Rose Bowl Stadium.

"There isn't really an easy way to tell you this, but the police came to the house earlier this evening and arrested Leonard." Jake said.

A cloud passed across Alex's face. "What do you mean he's been arrested? They let him go." She exclaimed in horror, lowering herself onto the bed.

For a moment Jake considered whether to tell Alex about the traces of blood which had been found in Leonard's car, but decided against it. It was better that she didn't know. "It seems that the security camera at Leonard and Penny's house was tampered with on the night Joy was killed. It means that other than your testimony, there's no way of proving that Leonard didn't leave the house."

"Penny sent you here." Alex stated knowingly, narrowing her eyes.

"Actually it was my idea to come." Jake lied. It seemed easier than telling her the truth that it had taken all his effort to stop Penny running out of the house to confront her.

Looking dazed, Alex got up from the bed and wandered onto the private balcony which overlooked a swimming pool. For a while she stood there in silence.

"Dr Jenson."

"Alex. Please call me Alex," Alex said without turning around. "Dr Jenson sounds so formal, don't you think?"

After a pause Jake spoke; "Alex, I understand that you care a great deal about Leonard. I don't think you would risk everything by giving him an alibi if you didn't." he concluded.

"And what would you know?" Alex snapped angrily. "I bet you have no idea what it's like to love someone and not have them love you in return."

Jake however knew exactly how Alex felt. He'd loved Penny for as long as he could remember and was at least part of the reason that he had moved back to New York for several years. The difference between himself and Alex was that he had never had any intention of trying to break up her marriage to Leonard.

"What _exactly_ did Penny tell you about me?" Alex enquired. "Did she say that I'm a devious bitch intent on stealing her husband away from her?"

"Right now the only thing Penny is concerned about is proving Leonard's innocence and keeping him out of jail." Jake said seriously. "So, if there's anything that you know."

"Are you accusing me of something?" Alex snapped in as hushed tone as she returned inside, sliding the balcony door after her. Afraid it would seem that she might be overheard. "Because to me that's exactly what it sounds like."

"Nobody is accusing you of anything Alex," Jake replied, although in truth he was beginning to come round to Penny's way of thinking, his instinct like hers was now telling him that she was hiding something.

"I've already told the police that I was with Leonard the whole night." Alex said defensively.

"Are you sure?" Jake pressed.

Averting her gaze to stare at the equations on her whiteboard Alex's mind flashed back to that night, recalling how she had entered silently into Leonard's study, intent on finding a way to arouse Penny's suspicions. It was after gaining access to Leonard's laptop that she had discovered the emails from Joy demanding money.

"What do you mean am I sure?" Alex demanded. "Of course I'm sure. I don't know anything about the security camera. Why would I?"

Sensing he wasn't getting anywhere Jake pressed his business card into Alex's hand. "If you really care for Leonard Alex, I suggest you think this over and call me when you're ready to talk. "Jake said furtively.

Alex knew that it was only a matter of time before the police sought her out to question her over the alibi she had provided Leonard, and for the briefest moment she considering telling Jake everything. Keeping it secret was killing her, but there was no way she could change her account of what had happened now. Nobody would believe her.

* * *

For Penny the waiting at home for news of Leonard was agonising. She had just finished feeding and settling Maddie when she heard her cell phone ring in the kitchen. Ascending the stairs in a matter of seconds, she snatched it up from the island.

"Penny? Sweetheart?"

Hearing the familiar concerned voice of her father, Penny's eyes filled with tears. "Daddy?" she said in a choked whisper.

"Sweetheart, I just heard about Leonard being arrested. Why ever didn't you call me?" he scolded gently.

At the age of eighty-three Wyatt and Penny's mother Susan lived in a retirement village in Omaha after giving up the farm where Penny and her siblings had grown up. Although it was often difficult with her hectic work schedule, Penny made a point of returning home to Nebraska at least twice a year to visit.

"I was going to call you Daddy. I didn't want to worry you. Besides, the police have made a terrible mistake."

"Damned right they've made a mistake." Wyatt raged. He loved Leonard as though he was his own son, and had on more than one occasion been instrumental in helping him and his daughter work through their past differences. "Your Mom and I think we should come and stay with you and the kids."

"Daddy, you really you don't have to do that." Penny cut in. Her father had a heart condition and she feared for his health should he come to LA and become embroiled in the media circus that had engulfed hers and Leonard's life.

"Don't you want us to come?" Wyatt said, sounding hurt. "We just want to be there for you both until all this mess gets straightened out."

"Believe me Daddy, just hearing your voice is helping," Penny said sadly. "Everything is a bit crazy here right now, but I promise I'll call you as soon as I hear anything."

"Are you sure sweetheart?" Wyatt asked. Penny could hear the disappointment in his voice. "You know just because you're a grown women and a big Hollywood star, doesn't mean that you can't turn to your Mom and Dad in a time of need. We'll always be here for you slugger."

Once more Penny blinked back tears. Her father hadn't called her by her childhood nickname in a very long time. In her younger years it used to upset and annoy her, but now she found it strangely comforting.

"Daddy I'll always need you." she said softly.

Just then Penny heard the sound of car drawing up outside the house.

"Daddy, I have to go." She said.

After telling her father that she loved him, and promising to call him the following day, Penny hung up the phone and headed outside onto the porch just in time to see her daughter getting out of a taxi.

"Mom, please don't be mad." Grace started whilst the driver fetched her luggage from the trunk. "I know you said not to come, but I couldn't just stay away knowing what was happening to Daddy."

Far from being angry with her daughter for making the journey from Chicago, Penny was relieved to see her standing in the driveway. The last few months had been difficult with her living away from home, but now with Leonard's freedom uncertain, she needed her more than ever.

"Sweetie, I'm not mad." Penny said seriously. "I just wanted to protect you from all this."

"Mom, I'm not a kid anymore." Grace responded sounding annoyed. "I certainly don't need protecting."

"I know." Penny whispered apologetically before putting her arm around her daughter's waist and steering her toward the house. In the last year she'd watched her blossom into a mature young woman who had got married and was on her way to a successful career as an emergency room nurse. "Believe me I'm so very happy to see you."

Just as they entered inside, Penny's cell phone began to ring.

"It's Leonard's lawyer."

"Mom, you have to answer that." Grace said, every bit as afraid as her mother.

With a trembling finger Penny swiped the screen and answered the call.

* * *

It was late evening and Arjun had been parked in the street outside Anna's apartment building for several hours. The wait had finally paid off when he saw a man emerge from entrance and get into a black BMW. Certain that it was Raj, he got out of his car and made purposefully toward the building. It was only once he was in the hallway outside Anna's front door, and poised to knock that Arjun hesitated. Ever since she'd let slip that she was pregnant he'd been in a daze, unable to concentrate on his work or to take any interest in his overbearing mother's plans for his forthcoming wedding. Taking a deep steading breath, he knocked.

"Arjun?" Anna said after opening the door in a satin bathrobe and slippers.

"I'm sorry I know its late." Arjun apologised. "Can I come in?" he asked.

Aware of her neighbour's rather unsavoury habit of listening at her peephole, Anna nodded and stepped aside, allowing her co-worker to enter into the privacy of her apartment. Inside Arjun discovered the remnants of Raj's romantic dinner for two. The dining table covered in a red table cloth with candles and origami napkin swans.

"Looks like you had a cosy evening." Arjun remarked.

Anna thought she could detect a note of jealousy in Arjun's voice. She didn't need to ask what had brought him to her home so late on a Sunday evening. She was only glad that she had managed to persuade Raj who had been very reluctant to leave of her need for a night to herself. As sweet and well intentioned as he was, she was starting to feel suffocated.

"I think you know why I'm here, Anna." Arjun said soberly.

Anna's gaze dropped to the floor as memories of a case involving a young woman on trial for the murder of her abusive husband came flooding back. Believing that her client had every chance of walking away free, Anna had been devastated when the jury had returned a guilty verdict. Convinced that she had failed her immeasurably, and doubting her ability as a lawyer, that night she had drowned her sorrows in vodka and sought solace in her friend and fellow lawyer.

"Anna," Arjun continued pulling her away from her thoughts. "Forgive me but I have to know….Could this baby be mine?"


	8. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Big Bang Theory.**

Gripping her daughter's hand, Penny wept tears of relief at the arraignment two days later as the presiding judge conveyed her decision to grant Leonard bail. They had already endured listening to the specifics of the charge that was being brought against him, and were now hearing the conditions of his bail. Penny's heart ached for husband who looked dazed and lost seated beside his lawyer. She'd brought him one of his suits to wear for his appearance in court, but even after only a few days in jail it looked too big on him due to the weight he'd lost. With the date for the trial set for spring of the following year, the court was adjourned.

"Oh my God." Penny cried as her arms enveloped her trembling husband.

"Can we just go home?" Leonard said quietly in what sounded almost like a childlike voice.

Penny nodded and wiped away her tears. She had arranged for a car to collect them, and was steeling herself for the inevitable encounter with the hoard of media that were gathered like vultures outside the courthouse. As per his bail conditions Leonard surrendered his passport and was promptly fitted thereafter with an electronic ankle tag that would track his whereabouts at all times.

"Come on sweetie lets go home." Penny said, slipping her hand into his.

Leonard was silent the throughout the journey home. Staring blankly out of the window at the rain soaked streets of Pasadena, he didn't notice the concerned looks which Penny and Grace exchanged. Back home he entered into the house in a daze, as though as was walking into unfamiliar surroundings rather than the place which been his home of many years.

"Why don't I fix you something to eat?" Penny offered after hanging up her jacket.

Leonard shook his head. Despite having not eaten more than a few mouthfuls for the three days he'd spent in custody he had no appetite.

"Where are the kids?" he asked.

"Sheldon and Amy have Maddie and Bobby is at school. I wanted to try and keep things as normal as possible for them." Penny answered. "They'll be home later." She added, smiling weakly.

"Normal?" Leonard said pointedly. "How could anything possibly be in anyway normal now?"

"Daddy, you don't look so well, "Grace began, sounding concerned. "Maybe we should call a doctor."

"I don't need a doctor. I'm just tired."

"Then you should rest as much as you need," Penny concluded. "And then maybe later we can all sit down as a family and eat together. I could order your favourite takeout." She added, smiling brightly.

Leonard didn't need any encouragement. With a weary nod he had just begun to climb the staircase when the home telephone rang.

"Daddy, it's President Webster." Grace said after answering the call and discovering that it was the President of the university. "He wants to speak with you."

Taking the handset from his daughter, Leonard waited until he had entered into his study and closed the door before speaking.

"Hello."

"Leonard, I heard what happened in court today. How are you doing?" President Webster asked, addressing him informally. In truth he felt somewhat at a loss of what to say to his head of the physics department given the dire and unprecedented circumstances.

"I'm fine." Leonard answered flatly. "I just need a couple of days to get my head straight and I'll be back at work."

"Actually Leonard that's why I'm calling," President Webster began after pausing to clear his throat. "The board and I had a meeting today. We think that given the circumstances it would be advisable for you to take a period of extended leave."

Leonard felt as though he'd been punched in the stomach. To him it sounded as though his employer had already presumed him to be guilty.

"Are you suspending me?" Leonard demanded.

"Leonard, we're not suspending you."

"Forgive me, but from where I'm standing President Webster it sounds like that's exactly what you're doing. What about my research project?" an exasperated Leonard questioned. He had no idea how he would be able to maintain his sanity without his work to distract him.

"Well nothing had been decided as yet, but we thought that as an interim measure Dr Jenson might be able to head up the project for the time being until we can find a suitable replacement. It'll only be temporary." President Webster responded. "Leonard, I hope you can understand that this isn't personal. It's just what we believe to be right for the physics department and the university."

"What ever happened to innocent until proven guilty?" Leonard snapped angrily.

President Webster had known Leonard for many years both professionally and personally, and in all that time there was nothing to suggest that he was capable of hurting someone, much less of committing murder.

"Leonard, for what it's worth despite how it might seem I don't believe that there is any way you could have done this," President Webster confessed. "I don't think you need me to tell you that the next few months are going to be really tough on you and your family. You need to take this time to prepare yourself. You're going to have a real fight on your hands, but please know that I'm completely on your side."

President's Webster's words of reassurance were however of little consolidation to Leonard. After hanging up the call he couldn't face telling Penny this latest news. He already felt as though he'd failed her by allowing Joy to blackmail him, and then by landing himself in the position of being arrested and charged for her murder. In order to avoid her he headed straight upstairs, locking the bedroom door behind him.

* * *

Penny was dreading returning to work. Despite Grace being home to help with taking care of her younger siblings, somehow it still felt wrong to leave Leonard when he was still so vulnerable and upset. As soon as her day at the studio was finished, she hurried home to find Leonard in the lounge watching TV in his bathrobe. From the smell of body odour that lingered in the room she could tell that as well as not shaving, he hadn't bothered to shower that day either.

"Sweetie, are you ok?" Penny asked, perching herself on the arm of the couch. Leonard appeared to be glued to a soap opera that ordinarily he wouldn't give a second glance. "How was your day?" she asked gently.

"Terrific." Leonard answered. "How about you?"

Penny's first day back at work hadn't been as awful as she'd anticipated. The studio audience had greeted with rapturous applause and a standing ovation as she made her way out onto the stage to introduce her first guest. It was their way of showing their support for her and Leonard, and had moved Penny close to tears.

"It was fine. Did you manage to speak with your lawyer?" Penny continued, carefully broaching the subject. From the look of her husband she doubted whether he'd moved from the couch all day or eaten, evidenced by the untouched sandwich on the coffee table.

Leonard gave a noncommittal shrug.

"Don't you think you should call him?"

"What's the point? Everyone already thinks I'm guilty. Let's face it I'm going to jail." Leonard answered, sounding defeated.

"Sweetie, that isn't true." Penny interjected.

"Isn't it?"

"Of course not. Everyone who knows you realises that you didn't do this." She said pointedly.

Picking up the remote control, Leonard aimed it at the TV changing channel to a game show where a dim-witted contestant was failing to answer the simplest of questions. Penny was trying her best to be supportive and to stay optimistic, but it was becoming increasingly difficult given that her husband seemed to already lost all hope. Just then they were interrupted by Penny's cellphone ringing.

"It's Jake. I'll call him back later." Penny said, quickly pocketing her phone, and turning her attention back to her husband.

"What do you think he wanted?" Leonard asked.

"Probably just to check in on us. He's been really supportive these last few days."

What Leonard said next caught Penny completely off guard.

"Jake Cunningham the real hero of the hour," he started, his voice it seemed dripping with jealously. "You get kidnapped and its _Jake_ who tracks you down and rescues you. Somebody tries to kill you and J _ake_ is the one who saves your life."

"Sweetie, why are you even saying all this? Jake is our friend." Penny said.

"Because it should have been me!" Leonard yelled, startling Penny with the ferocity of his tone. " _I_ should be the one who protects you, but all I seem to be capable of is failing to do just that. I'm a failure Penny. A failure as a husband and a failure as a father. You guys would be better off without me."

"Leonard, I don't want you to hear you talking like this! It's like you've already given up." Penny yelled back in frustration. "Sweetie, I love you, but you're acting like it's already over. Surely you owe it yourself and to me and the kids to fight this with everything you've got?" She added stridently.

"Penny, I'm so scared," Leonard whispered after a pause. "If I'm convicted I'll be an old man before I get out of jail. I might never get out. I won't get to see the kids grow up…maybe even our grandkids."

Penny slipped her hand into Leonard's, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "I know you're scared, but I promise I'm going to be here with you through all of this. You're not alone Leonard Hofstadter. Not now. Not ever. You need to promise me that you're not going to give up."

Leonard hesitated before giving Penny his word, but somehow Penny felt less than convinced. Undoubtedly the next few months were going to extremely difficult for the whole family. After talking, Leonard headed upstairs to take a shower whilst Penny turned her attention to the welcome distraction of preparing dinner. Unfortunately, in the last few days their housekeeper had had to go away suddenly when her own mother had been taken ill. Penny had just begun chopping the salad when Grace entered into the kitchen.

"Mom, I'm going to go fetch Bobby from his after school club." She announced.

"Dammit, I forgot. How the hell could I forget my own son?" Penny cursed herself before feeling a comforting hand on her back.

"Mom, it's ok. You have so much to think about right now," Grace soothed kindly. "I heard you and Daddy fighting earlier. Are you ok? Have you been crying?" she asked.

Penny put down the knife, wiped her hands on her apron and turned around to see the look of deep concern on her daughter's face.

"Sweetie, we weren't fighting."

"Really? It sure sounded like you were. What was all that stuff about Jake?" Grace questioned. She hadn't intended to listen in, but couldn't help but overhear her parents heated exchange as she passed by the lounge door on her way to the kitchen.

"Your Dad is just in a really difficult place right now." Penny said with a heavy sigh.

"But why was he so mad with Jake? I thought they were friends."

Penny sensed that her daughter wasn't going to give up her line of questioning.

"Grace there's something you don't know about Jake… I guess you could say that he and I have a little history." She said sheepishly.

Grace raised her eyebrows. "What do you mean you and Jake have _history_? Did you used to date or something?"

"No, nothing like that. It was just…well we kissed once." Penny confessed and was surprised to feel her face flush with heat. "It was a lot of years ago. In fact, you weren't even born." She added.

Grace was astounded. She'd known Jake all her life and particularly remembered when she was aged ten how he'd flown back from New York after Bobby was born prematurely leaving Penny critically ill in the hospital. She also recalled how it was his passion for his job as an EMT that had inspired her to become an emergency room nurse.

"And Daddy knows about this?"

"Yeah, he knows."

"Who kissed who? Did Jake kiss you?"

"I honestly don't remember. I think I might have kissed him." Penny replied. Opening the refrigerator to retrieve a cucumber, she glimpsed the bottle of white wine chilling inside and found herself longing for a glass.

"Seriously Mom, how did that even happen?"

"Sweetheart, you need to understand that I was a different person back then. Your Dad and I had been fighting a lot. I was pregnant with you and I was so determined to have a homebirth. Your Dad disagreed, he was worried that it wouldn't be safe, that something would go wrong with the labour. Jake he…well he was the only one who seemed to understand and support me in my decision. I know it doesn't excuse what happened. What I did with Jake was a stupid mistake, and I _really really_ regretted afterwards."

Grace knew only too well of her parents turbulent dating history and of their numerous breakups, but had no idea that Jake had been the cause at one time.

"But Daddy forgave you, right?" Grace concluded logically.

Penny nodded. It had however taken her own father travelling from Omaha to intervene before Leonard was willing give their relationship another chance. Sadly, it had been during his visit that Wyatt had suffered his first heart attack. It was something which Penny had blamed herself for despite the fact that the doctor at the time insisting that the heart attack could have happened at any time.

"Do you think Jake might have a thing for you?" Grace ventured, chewing thoughtfully on a slice of cucumber which she'd picked out of the salad bowl.

"Oh my God of course not!" Penny answered, laughing at the absurdity of the suggestion. "Jake and I have been really good friends for years. Honestly, now I see him as like an older brother."

That night dinner in the Hofstadter home was full of awkward silences and a family that were largely disinterested in the food on their plates. Penny and Grace tried their best to introduce cheerful topics of conversation, and to steer away from talking about Leonard's arrest and impending trial. Penny was horrified to discover that some of the children at Bobby's after school club had tormented him about his father go to jail, and as such it had taken her a considerable amount of time to try and allay her son's fears. After dinner was finished, Penny urged Leonard to have an early night whilst she loaded the dishwasher and tidied the kitchen. She had just finished when the doorbell rang.

"Hello?" Penny said into the intercom.

"Penny, its Jake."

Penny promptly pressed the button to release the gate.

"I'm sorry I know it's a little late." Jake began after Penny had opened the front door to find him waiting outside wearing his EMT uniform. "I tried calling you earlier during my break. I wanted to speak with you and Leonard. It's about Lauren."

"Leonard's already in bed. What is it? Is she ok?" Penny asked as Jake followed her into the kitchen where she headed for the refrigerator and took out the bottle of wine which had been beckoning her all evening. "Do you want a glass?" she offered.

"No, thank you." Jake responded. He gathered that Penny was no longer breastfeeding, but daren't ask for fear of sounding judgmental. "How are doing?" he asked eyeing her with a look of concern.

Penny gave an exaggerated shrug as she filled her glass. "On the one hand I'm so relieved that Leonard's home, but at the same time I'm terrified. Right now I'm just trying to hold it together for the sake of Leonard and the kids." She admitted.

"You know I'm here for you both should ever need to talk or maybe some help with the kids." Jake said with a sympathetic smile.

Penny nodded gratefully.

"Penny, the reason I'm here is the police called Lauren today," Jake began.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, they're going to release Joy's body soon for the funeral. I just thought that you and Leonard would want to know."

Penny took a sip of her wine and wondered whether Lauren had managed to contact her father whom she'd heard spent a great deal of time working overseas.

"Do you think it would be inappropriate for Leonard and I to offer to pay for the funeral?" She asked. She couldn't imagine how as a fulltime student Lauren would be able to pay for a funeral without getting herself into debt. "I would need to talk with Leonard, but I'm certain that's what he would want. She is family after all. Do you think you could speak with her?"

"I can certainly try." Jake answered.

After a short silence Penny decided to bring up Alex again. Jake had already shared with her how Alex had reacted the night he had gone to see her, and how she had fiercely denied knowing anything about why the home security camera had not been recording.

"Do you really think Alex is hiding something?" Penny asked. Aside from worrying day and night about Leonard, Alex and her possible involvement had consumed her thoughts.

"I don't know," Jake replied. "She certainly seemed panicked when I confronted her with it, but logically it makes no sense. Why would Alex frame Leonard for murder and then give him an alibi? She certainly had no motive to kill Joy herself. She didn't even know her."

In the intervening days Penny had called the company that supported the software for the security system. According to them although very unlikely, a malfunction causing the cameras to cease recording was possible. In other words, it could have been nothing but a very unfortunate coincidence.

"Did Alex know that Joy was blackmailing him?" Jake questioned.

"No, he says he didn't tell her."

"Do you think she could have found out some other way?"

Just then then Grace padded into the kitchen barefooted in her bathrobe. She acknowledged Jake, but made no attempt to engage in conversation. After fetching a bottle of water from the refrigerator and saying goodnight to Penny she left.

"Is Grace ok?" Jake asked. He couldn't help but notice the somewhat cool reception, and wondered if he could have possibly done anything to upset her.

"She's worried like we all are." Penny answered.

Soon after Jake left and returned home to find that Lauren was already in the bedroom with the door closed. Not wishing to disturb her, he decided to wait to the following day to talk with her. After going to bed and falling asleep Jake was awoken abruptly by his cell phone, fearing that he had overslept and was late for his shift he hastily answered.

"Hello." he said sleepily.

According to the alarm clock on the nightstand it was just after 3am.

"Jake?" a shrill female asked.

"Who is this?"

"It's Alex."

Jake sat up in bed. He'd given Alex his cellphone number, but after several days had given up hope that she would actually reach out to him.

"I..I need to talk to you..I don't know what to do.." Alex stammered, sounding frightened and desperate.

Jake had already lept out of bed and pulling on a pair of jeans. "Where are you? Are you at the hotel?" he asked hurriedly, afraid that she might change her mind and hang up before he could ascertain her whereabouts.

"I'm….I'm on a bridge."

All at once Jake froze as a stark memory of Joy the night she had come close to taking her own life flashed through his mind. "Which bridge?"

"The Colorado Street Bridge." Alex answered in a barely audible whisper.

"Alex, I'm on my way. Just stay where you are. I'll be there as soon as I can." Jake said. It had taken him less than a minute to dress and make his way outside to his car. By the time he'd started the engine the line was dead.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: In the last chapter I neglected to extend my thanks to Tensor who was very helpful in advising me on how, and under what circumstances bail might be granted. Thanks Tensor :)**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Big Bang Theory.**

Anna couldn't hide her annoyance as she got out of her car outside Raj's house. She'd been about to leave for work when he'd called to insist that she drive over to his place. There was something incredibly exciting he wanted to show her.

"Well?" she said impatiently after Raj opened the front door sporting a satisfied grin. "What was so urgent that I had to drive right over here?"

"First cover your eyes." Raj commanded in a sing-song voice.

"You do know I have to be in court by ten, right?" Anna responded curtly. In the rush to get over to his house she had managed to spill coffee on her pants suit, and had snapped the heel of her shoe, forcing her to change into a pair of old sneakers that she kept in the trunk of her car. She just hoped that nobody in court that day would notice.

"I promise this won't take long." Raj said as he guided Anna up the staircase and onto the upstairs hall. "Ok, you can look now."

With an exasperated sigh, Anna removed her hands from her eyes to find herself standing in the doorway of what had been one of Raj's spare bedrooms, but that had now been remodeled into a stylish nursery. With a crystal chandelier hanging above a crib and cream velvet drapes, it looked like something out of a celebrity magazine. In the corner of the room was a giant sized teddy bear sitting on a white wooden rocking chair.

"Ta-da!" Raj exclaimed. "I hired the same interior designer that Leonard and Penny used for Maddie's nursery." he stated, beaming proudly.

Anna stepped towards the crib and gazed upon the designer bear print quilt and a multitude of cuddly toys.

"I know you want to leave the sex of the baby as a surprise so I figured it was best to go for neutral colours," Raj continued, oblivious to the cloud that had passed across his girlfriend's face. "We can always change it up a bit after he or she is born, although I kinda love it as it is. It's just so chic, don't you think?"

Anna turned around from the crib to reveal a look of displeasure. "Raj, at any point did you think about discussing this with me?" she said.

All at once Raj's smile dissolved into a dismayed frown. "Don't you like it? We can always change it if you want."

"It's not the choice of décor that I have a problem with," Anna responded angrily. "It's the fact that you just assumed that I would move in here with you."

"Why wouldn't you move in here? You live in a tiny apartment. I have so much more space, not to mention the garden and the swimming pool…"

Throwing her hands up in frustration, Anna turned abruptly. "You know what I have to get to work, I don't have time for this right now." She said as she hurried down the stairs with a concerned Raj trailing after her.

"Can we at least talk later?" Raj said as Anna marched determinedly towards her car and threw open the door. "I've made a reservation for tonight at Le Petit Paris." he persisted, his thoughts turning to the Tiffany ring that was hidden in his desk drawer and the carefully thought out plan he had devised to give it to her.

About to get into the car, Anna hesitated, "Can we take a rain check? I don't know when I'll get away. It could be very late." She said.

"Anna, I love you and I love our baby," Raj started with pleading eyes. "I just want us to be a family and to take care of you both."

Despite his huge assumption, Anna knew in her heart that Raj had only good intentions, and that she and the baby meant everything to him. Overwhelmed with a sense of guilt she relented, telling him that she would try her best to get away from work.

"Call me later." a relieved Raj said as he waved Anna goodbye.

* * *

With a shaky hand a bedraggled Alex brought the coffee mug to her lips and took a long sip. After driving to find her on the bridge, Jake had brought her to an all-night diner he frequented after finishing a shift.

"Alex, you have to go the police and tell them what you've told me." he said in a hushed tone after the member of staff who was mopping the floor moved away.

Alex shook her head, and a single tear trailed down her cheek. "I can't." she murmured.

"Leonard could go to jail." Jake implored, leaning forward in his seat and he could see the fear in her eyes.

"Don't you think I know that?" Alex seethed.

Jake drummed his fingers on the table for a few seconds whilst thinking of what next to say. He could go to the police himself, but without Alex agreeing to alter her statement it would be his word against hers. Undoubtedly it would never stand up as credible evidence in court.

"You don't understand. If I change my statement they won't believe anything I've told them…They might even think that I did it."

"But you didn't do it." Jake cut in.

"Neither did Leonard, but that hasn't stopped him being charged with murder." Alex countered.

Just then a server approached the booth with a coffee jug offering a refill, Jake waved her away. "You're in love with Leonard, aren't you?" he said. "However misguided what you did was, I reckon you only did it because of the feelings you have for him."

Knowing the truth was written on her face, Alex's gaze dropped to the table. "What does that matter?"

"Because if you really love Leonard you'll do the right thing. You'll go to the police and tell them what actually happened that night."

There was a silence, and for a brief moment Jake thought that he'd managed to change her mind. Suddenly Alex was on her feet.

"Alex?"

"I….I have to go." she stammered as she scooped up her purse from the seat.

Before Jake could stop her, Alex had bolted from the diner. Following her outside, he witnessed her dart across the street, narrowly missing being struck by an oncoming delivery truck. Safely reaching the other side, Alex hailed a taxi and got inside.

"Dammit!" Jake cursed as he watched the taxi pull away.

* * *

Grace was rapidly losing her patience in trying to get her younger brother to eat his breakfast when the intercom rang. With Maddie balanced on her hip, and still wearing her robe and slippers, she went to the front door to discover that it was Jake.

"Hi Grace, is your Mom and Dad home?" he asked.

"Daddy is still asleep and Mom left for the studio nearly an hour ago." She told him.

"Oh, I see."

Grace studied Jake standing on the front porch. He was wearing a crumpled shirt and hadn't shaved, his deep-set frown suggesting that he was troubled by something.

"Can I take a message?" she offered.

"No thanks, that's ok. I'll try and catch up with them later."

Jake was about to turn to leave, when Grace spoke. "Hey Jake, do you remember right after Bobby was born how you came back from New York?" she began. "You took care of me whilst Daddy was at the hospital."

"Grace, that was more than ten years ago. Sometimes I can't remember what I had for dinner." Jake answered flatly. He was in no mood to go over events of the past.

"Really? I was only ten and yet I remember so much about that week." Grace persisted, perplexed as to why Jake hadn't ventured to ask why she should ask such a question now.

"Like I said it was a very long time ago." Jake repeated.

"So, you don't remember taking me to the playground at Singer park, and getting a call from Daddy to say that Mom was in the ICU?"

Jake remained silent, failing to either confirm or deny.

"I was playing on the swings. I remember watching you after you'd hung up, you walked away so that I wouldn't see you, but I saw you crying. You looked devastated."

Jake gave a nervous cough. "Grace, I've known your Mom and Dad for many years. I regard them as really close friends of mine. Naturally I was upset when I heard about Penny."

"So, you _do_ remember?" Grace interrupted, narrowing her eyes with suspicion.

"Ok, I admit I remember. Leonard was so desperate at the thought of losing your Mom. I tried to offer him so reassurance, but there really was nothing I could say. Grace, it really isn't a time I want to dwell on. Look, I need to go." Jake said, hoping to bring the conversation to a close.

"Mom told me." Grace spat out as Jake turned his back on her causing him to freeze on the spot.

"Told you what?" he asked quietly.

"That you kissed."

Jake hung his head, he had no idea why Penny had decided to share with her daughter what had until now remained largely secret for more than twenty years.

"And I'm sure that she will have also told you that it only happened the once, and that it we both agreed it was a mistake." Jake said furtively.

"She did."

"So why bring it up?" Jake questioned, unwittingly adopting a harsher tone than he intended.

"Because I think you might still have feelings for her. I've seen the way you look at her when you think nobody's watching, and I always thought I was imagining it, but now I don't think I was." Grace said.

Jake wanted nothing more than to walk away from the confrontation with Grace, but he couldn't.

"Grace, I care deeply for your Mom, but only in the same way that I care deeply for all your family." he said after a pause, surprising himself as just how easily the unavoidable lie came. "I may have been responsible for the breakup of both my marriages, but I'm never been in the habit of breaking up other people's marriages. You probably don't know this, but after Bobby was born and your parents broke up, I helped your Mom to realise that she shouldn't give up on her marriage. It was me that convinced her to see a therapist."

Grace's face glowed red with embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Jake," She said."I guess I got it wrong."

"I know you're under an enormous strain you're under right now with what's happening to your Dad." Jake said sympathetically. "Why don't we just agree to forget this ever happened, and not mention to anybody?"

Grace nodded. "Sure."

With that Jake began towards his car."Take care, Grace."

Only once he was out of sight did Jake close his eyes and breath a sigh of relief. As soon as this was over, and Anna was settled with her new baby he planned to leave Pasadena for good.

* * *

Penny was not her usual chatty self whilst having her hair and makeup done ahead of her show. Cindy her makeup artist couldn't help but notice her distant and distracted demeanor, but put it down to her worries over Leonard. With only half an hour before she was due to go on air, Barbara, the show's producer knocked on Penny's dressing room door.

"Penny, there's somebody here to see you," she said, clutching the iPad that never seemed to leave her hands. "I told him you were busy, but he insisted that I ask you. He says his name is Jake."

Penny got up from her chair and fastened her robe. "I'll speak to him. Cindy can you give me a few minutes please."

A minute later a troubled looking Jake appeared in the doorway, reflected in the dressing table mirror, Penny turned and knew instantly that whatever he was about to say, it was serious.

"Jake, what is it?"

Jake motioned toward a blush pink velvet couch. Penny moved towards it, her eyes fixed expectantly on him as she seated herself.

"There's something you need to know," Jake started. He'd never visited Penny on the set of her show before, if anything up until recently he'd tried his best to distance himself from her. "You were right about Alex."

"I freakin knew it!" Penny exclaimed. "Well, what is it? Did she talk to you?" she questioned when Jake who was still struggling to process what Alex had told him hesitated to reply.

"Yeah, she called me and asked to meet," Jake answered, deciding to leave out how distressed she had been, and the fact that she'd made the call from a bridge in the middle of the night. "She managed to gain access to Leonard's laptop. She was intent on finding a way to make you suspect that she and Leonard were having an affair."

"That bitch." Penny said through gritted teeth.

"Alex read Leonard's email, and found out that Joy was blackmailing him."

"She killed Joy, didn't she?"

Jake shook his head, and a cloud passed across Penny's face. She got up and began pacing the length of her dressing room.

"Ok, so if that's true how the hell did the police find traces of Alex's blood on my husband's car?" she demanded angrily.

"According to Alex, Joy showed up at your house demanding more money. Alex confronted her on the driveway, and Joy lashed out. Alex maintains that when she hit back in defense, Joy fell against the hood of Leonard's car."

"That's a lie. Leonard nearly always parks in his car in the garage," Penny said defensively. "And anyway, he would have told me."

"Alex says that Leonard was asleep the whole time. Remember they had been drinking all evening, and as for being parked on the driveway you'd need to check with Leonard."

Penny couldn't deny that Leonard had never been able to handle much more than two drinks. It was something she'd come to realise after they'd first begun dating when he'd got drunk on a combination of wine and peach schnapps one evening.

"Alex swears that other than a bloody nose and a bruised ego, Joy was fine when she drove off," Jake continued. "After that she deleted the footage on the security camera so that Leonard would never see it. Penny, I know this might not be easy for you to hear, but I believe her. The problem is she's refusing to go to the police to change her statement. She's convinced it will make things worse for her."

"Worse for her? What about Leonard?" Penny yelled with no regard as to who might hear her. "We have to find a way to make her. I'll make her if I have to.."

Just then there was a knock at the door. "Penny, we need you in the studio in ten." a voice called out.

"Penny, Alex trusted me enough to tell me the truth about what happened. It was killing her keeping it a secret. I think that I can convince her to go to the police. Just give me a little time to work on her."

Believing she had no other choice, Penny reluctantly nodded her agreement just as Courtney from wardrobe breezed into the room bringing her outfit for the show. By the time she looked around, Jake was gone.

* * *

Penny decided to forgo the after show crew lunch, opting instead to drive over to Jake's house. In the intervening hours since their conversation, she'd changed her mind. Driven by an innate mistrust of the woman that had tried to steal her husband, and despite Jake's reassurances, she knew she had to act now to get Alex to change her statement, either with or without him. In her haste Penny failed to notice that Jake's car was not on his driveway, and was somewhat taken aback when Lauren came to the front door.

"Lauren hi, how are you?" she asked.

Lauren shrugged and replied that she was ok. "Did you want to come in?" she added.

Penny smiled. "Sure, if that's ok with you. Is Jake not home?" she enquired casually after following Lauren into the lounge.

"No, he texted and said something about having to swap his early shift for a late."

"Oh, I see."

"Did you want to speak with him about something?" Lauren asked. Penny seemed to be a little on edge, and she noticed that although she'd changed into jeans and a sweater, she was still wearing the TV makeup suggesting she had left the studio in a hurry.

"Nothing that can't wait."

For a moment Lauren hovered nervously by the couch, before finally offering Penny a seat.

"Jake told me that you're making plans for Joy's funeral," Penny started after a short silence. She doubted whether he'd had had the chance to mention her offer to help her financially, but decided that now was perhaps a good time to broach the subject. "You know Leonard and I would very much like to help you with the cost. Funerals can be very expensive."

With her head lowered, avoiding eye contact, Penny saw Lauren wringing her hands in the same way that Leonard still did from time to time.

"Thank you, but I think I'd rather take care of it myself." Lauren said.

"Won't you at least think about it?" Penny coaxed gently. "By the time I was your age I'd plunged myself into mounds of credit card debt," She recalled. "It really made life difficult. Often I didn't even have money to buy food."

"I know. Leonard told me that when you met you were a struggling waitress that used to eat his and Sheldon's food."

Penny gave a small laugh. "Actually I'd prefer to think of myself as an aspiring actress who was having difficulty making ends meet whilst waiting for her big break." She said, eliciting a weak smile from Lauren who then asked after Leonard.

"Honestly, not so good." Penny answered. "Lauren, I understand that you're going through a really difficult time right now, and I'm not going to ask you to move back home if you don't want to, but might you at least come over to visit?" she asked. "I know Leonard would be so happy to see you. We all would. You're part of the family."

Penny was relived and inwardly overjoyed when Lauren nodded her acceptance.

"Great, actually it's my birthday next week. Maybe we could have a family dinner at home." She suggested.

Lauren stood up, realising that she'd neglected to offer Penny a drink she went into the kitchen to make coffee. It was with Lauren out of the room that Penny caught sight of what appeared to be a large book peeking out from beneath the couch. Expecting it to be a book on doulas or pregnancy, she picked it up, discovering it to be not a book, but rather a scrap book of pictures and magazine articles charting her entire career from her early days on _Matters of the Heart_ to her most current show.

"Penny, I've forgotten how you take your coffee."

Penny snapped the scrapbook shut, and hastily replaced it beneath the couch.

"Actually Lauren I think I'd better go. I should get home for Maddie," she said. "I'll be in touch about next week, but in the meantime if there's anything you need or if you change your mind about us helping with the funeral."

"I'll call you, I promise." Lauren responded.

* * *

Getting into her car and tossing her purse on the passenger seat, Penny was pleased and reassured with the progress she'd made with Lauren. If nothing else she'd agreed to come to dinner, and maybe that would lead her to change her mind about moving back home. Her thoughts then turned to Jake's scrapbook. He'd certainly never mentioned it to her, and she found herself remembering the conversation with Grace the night before, and how her daughter had asked about the possibility of Jake still harboring feelings for her. Brushing these unwanted thoughts away, Penny started the engine, and instead of turning right and heading for home, she programmed her satnav for the Greentree Inn. Twenty minutes later she pulled into the hotel's parking lot, and without affording herself any time in which to change her mind headed up the staircase to Alex's room. When she arrived Penny found the door open, inside the maid was busily vacuuming whilst listening to the radio on the TV.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Dr Jenson." Penny said.

"She checked out today Ma'am." the maid answered with only a cursory glance in Penny's direction, fortunately it seemed that she didn't recognise her.

Penny reached into her purse for her cell phone and dialed the university physics department. She recognised the voice of the female administrator who answered, but thought it prudent not to reveal herself as Leonard Hofstadter's wife. "Can I speak with Dr Alex Jenson please." She said confidently.

"I'm afraid Dr Jenson isn't here today." the lady answered, sounding distracted. Penny could hear the sound of typing in the background and muffled voices.

"Do you have any idea where I might find her? I'm a friend and it's really important that I speak with her."

"I have no idea. Between you and me Dr Jenson didn't show up at work today. We're all a little concerned about her, particularly after the other day."

"What about the other day?" Penny enquired.

"Well, not that I saw it with my own eyes, but apparently Dr Jenson freaked out in the cafeteria. She threw her lunch tray, and ran out. I guess all the speculation about her involvement with the murder of that Joy woman finally got to her." the administrator speculated in a gossipy tone of voice.

Penny's mouth went dry. "Shit!" She cursed after hanging up.

There was no mistaking what had happened. Alex was gone.


	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Big Bang Theory.**

Joy's funeral took place during the first week in December. Precluded himself from attending due to his stringent bail conditions, Leonard was somewhat taken aback when Penny insisted that she go, not to pay her respects to Joy whom she despised, but to support Lauren who was bereft over the loss of her mother. There was also a part of her that wanted to go as an act of defiance, Leonard was innocent, and as such there was no reason for her to stay away. It was late afternoon by the time Penny returned home. Slipping off her shoes in the hall, she could hear the sound of muffled voices coming from the kitchen.

"Sweetie?" Penny called as she ventured into the kitchen in her stocking feet. "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know you had company." she apologised when she discovered that the visitor was Leonard's lawyer, Jeffery McAllister. Although the news of Alex's disappearance had hit Leonard hard, over the last two weeks Penny had been relieved by his renewed determination to work with his lawyer in preparation for his forthcoming trial. So far the police had failed to find Alex, despite making extensive enquiries with her family in her hometown of De Moines, Iowa, who all insisted that they hadn't heard from her in weeks.

"Hello Mrs Hofstadter, actually I think we're pretty much done here for now," Jeffery said as he closed his laptop and began gathering up the papers that were spread out over the kitchen table. "I'll be in touch soon Leonard, but please feel free to call me anytime." he added as he shook the hand of his client.

"So, how did the funeral go?" Leonard asked after he'd seen Jeffery to the door and returned to the kitchen to find Penny operating the coffee machine.

Penny hesitated and poured herself a coffee. "Oh, you know how funerals can be sweetie." She said with a dismissive shrug.

Leonard studied his wife's face and sensed that she was holding something back.

"What about you? How did it go with Jeffery? Have the police made any progress tracing Alex?" she questioned in an effort to steer the conversation away from what had turned out to be an eventful and somewhat traumatic funeral.

Leonard pulled out a stool at the kitchen island and gestured for Penny to be seated. "First I want you to tell me about the funeral."

Penny nodded. She knew that if she didn't tell Leonard herself he'd find out from Howard or Bernadette who had also attended. "Ok well the thing is Lucas showed up at the wake."

"Lucas was there? I didn't know that Lauren had even invited him." Leonard said of the man who until a few months ago Lauren had believed was her father, and had so far been conspicuous in his absence.

"She didn't. Oh my God Leonard he was so drunk he could barely walk," Penny recalled. "He kept saying how sorry he was to Lauren, and how he just wanted her to hear him out."

"Hear him out about what?" Leonard demanded, visibly angered.

"I have no idea," Penny answered, shaking her head sadly. "He refused to leave. In the end Jake had to throw him out, and…well that's not all that happened," she continued, chewing nervously on her lower lip. "Lucas recognised me. He yelled at me about how messed up it was that the wife of Joy's killer should be at her funeral. That's when Jake stepped in. Honestly, I think my being there just made things a whole load worse. Lauren was so upset that Jake had to take her home."

Dropping down from the stool, Leonard retrieved his cell phone from his jeans pocket and swiped the screen.

"Who are you calling?" Penny asked.

"Lauren. I need to check that's she's ok."

Seeing the look of dismay upon her husband's face as his call went to voicemail, Penny wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'm sorry," she whispered regretfully. "I shouldn't have gone today. I know you had your doubts about me going."

"No, don't do that Penny. Don't be blaming yourself for something that wasn't your fault," Leonard responded softly. "Besides, I know you only went out of loyalty for me, although I could literally _kill_ Lucas for showing up like that." he added before acknowledging his poorly chosen words. From now on he was aware that he had to be very careful about what he said and did. At times it felt like the whole world was watching him, just waiting for him to slip up and prove his guilt.

"Sweetie, I know what you meant," Penny said, smiling warmly. "It's only natural that you want to be protective of Lauren. She's your daughter."

Aside from Albert curled up asleep in his basket in the corner of the kitchen, the house was serenely silent. Leonard had not long since put Maddie down for her nap, while Bobby had been invited to a friend's house after school.

"You know this is the first time in a while that we've had the house to ourselves," Penny cooed whilst seductively loosening the top button of her black dress.

Leonard seemed to hesitate. They hadn't made love since the night before Penny had left for her trip to London, not because he didn't want to, but because he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to please her. Since getting out on bail his head had been a mess, preventing him from thinking about anything else other than the possibility of spending the rest of his life in jail.

"Penny, I just don't know if.."

"It's ok," Penny interrupted, silencing Leonard by tenderly placing a finger on his lips. She could read her husband like a book, and understood his fears. "Even if we just lay down together that's ok, I just need to feel you close to me."

With that Leonard took Penny by the hand and led her upstairs.

* * *

When Lauren awoke the morning after the funeral she could hear someone outside on the driveway. Getting out of bed, she drew the drapes and saw Jake loading items into the trunk of his car. Fastening her robe, she made her way outside onto the porch.

"Good morning," Lauren said, hugging herself to keep warm. It was a crisp December day, and the sun had not long risen. "Are you going somewhere?" she asked.

"Actually an old college buddy of mine offered me his fishing cabin up at Lake Arrowhead. I've been meaning to take him up on it for ages, seeing as it's the weekend and I have some time off work I thought I would get away for a couple of days." Jake explained as he heaved a tackle box into the trunk alongside a fishing pole. "Unless of course you don't want me to go." he added, with a look of concern.

Lauren had been inconsolable at the funeral after Lucas had showed up uninvited. After returning home, she and Jake had talked for hours, with Lauren telling him about her childhood, and what it was like being raised by Joy and the man she'd believed to be her father. In the end it had been gone midnight when they'd finally got to bed.

"Really I'm fine. You should go," Lauren answered. "It's so beautiful there."

"You've been there?" Jake asked, to which Lauren replied that she had spent a weekend at lake with the Hofstadter's at their vacation home in October.

"Leonard mentioned that he and Penny renewed their wedding vows at the lake last summer, I guess you must have been there."

Jake stiffened at the mention of Penny's name. Getting away from Pasadena and the Hofstadter's, particularly after Grace had accused him of having feelings for Penny was one of the main reasons he'd decided to go on the fishing trip.

"What's this? You have a CD player in your car?" Lauren exclaimed after sighting a collection of music CDs from the early 2000s on the front passenger seat. Picking them up, she browsed the titles of the artists and bands which included Nickelback, Coldplay and Katie Melua. "I didn't think anybody listened to CDs anymore. These are practically antiques." She chuckled.

"Well, I guess you could say that I'm a little old school," Jake grinned. "Most of this music reminds me of my college days. I had some real fun times back then." He reminisced.

Lauren knew that Jake had met Anna's mother at college, and although she was curious about his past, she daren't ask him for fear of seeming to be prying. One thing she'd learnt in the last month about Jake Cunningham was that he was largely a very private man.

"Looks like you're all set," Lauren said after Jake had loaded a cool box and finally a small case with his clothes for the weekend. "I assume you'll be fishing for rainbow trout?" she added knowingly.

"Yeah, actually. How did you know?"

"I like fishing. I used to go with my Grandpa during the summer vacation. To be honest I think he would have preferred a grandson, but actually I was pretty good at it. It would drive him crazy when I would land the biggest catch." She said, smiling at the memory.

By now Jake was seated behind the wheel of his car with his seat belt on and the window down.

"I'm sorry I'm holding you up," Lauren apologised, and took a step back from the driveway onto the lawn. "Have a terrific time."

"Lauren, would you maybe like to come with me? It might be good for both of us to get away for a couple of days." Jake suggested.

Lauren hesitated causing Jake to instantly regret his invitation.

"Actually, I'd like that," Lauren said,"You're right, some time away would be good for me."

Half an hour later Lauren had showered, dressed and packed a bag. When she got into the car Jake had selected one of his CDs for the drive.

"Ready?" he asked as Lauren fitted her seat belt.

"Hey, we could stop at the Cheesecake Factory for breakfast." Lauren suggested, unaware that it was the restaurant where Penny had worked when she and Jake had first become acquainted so many years ago.

Jake started the engine and shifted the car into reverse. "Actually I know a better place." he said.

* * *

It was Saturday evening and Howard and Bernadette were having date night at their favourite Italian restaurant, Celestino. The waiter had just poured the wine and presented them with menus when Howard's cell phone rang.

"It's Raj," Howard sighed, "Honey, I did tell him it was our date night tonight."

Bernadette scowled fiercely at her husband over the rim of her wine glass. Over the last few weeks he'd spent an inordinate amount of time supporting his best friend after his relationship with Anna had apparently run into some difficulty. "You'd better answer it." she said.

Howard grabbed his phone from the table. "Hey Raj."

"I've decided that tonight's the night." Raj declared. Straightening his bow tie in front of a mirror, he had slipped away from the party he was attending with Anna at the Langham Hotel to call Howard from the bathroom.

Howard blinked in confusion. "Tonight's the night for what exactly?"

"For me to ask Anna to marry me. We're at her law firm's Christmas party. I'm going to get her outside onto the balcony to look at the stars, and then I'm going to get down on one knee with the ring. You know I'm even thinking we could get married on New Year's Eve."

Howard pinched the bridge of his nose in dismay. Experience told him that it was about to go disastrously wrong for his friend. "Buddy, I'm really not sure that's such a great idea," he said. "Only a few weeks ago you backed out of proposing because you felt Anna wasn't ready."

"I know, but Anna and I are in so much a better place now. She's already come round to the idea of us living together. I really think she's ready for this," he added, with a faraway look in his eyes. "Anna is the woman I love and want to spend the rest of my life with, surely you can understand that."

After listening to his friend declare his love for Anna, Howard realised there was nothing he could say to dissuade him. "Ok, well good luck." he said before hanging up.

"Howie, what's happening?" Bernadette asked after Howard had returned to the table, and ordered a large whiskey.

"It's not _what's_ happening," he answered, shaking his head. "It's what's I fear is _going_ to happen."

At the hotel Raj emerged from the bathroom and craned his neck in search of Anna, eventually spotting her on the balcony outside sipping orange juice from a champagne flute. Watching her from a distance, he was blown away by how stunning she looked dressed in a sapphire blue satin gown which fitted perfectly over her pregnancy bump, her hair swept up on her head into a chignon. There were times when he had to pinch himself to remind himself that she was actually his girlfriend, and hopefully soon his fiancee. It was only as he neared her that he noticed she wasn't alone, but talking with a younger Asian man in a tuxedo. Although Raj couldn't hear what was being said, there was something about Anna's demeanor that momentarily halted him in his tracks.

"There you are darling. I've been looking for you," Raj said, slipping his arm protectively around Anna's waist. "Aren't you going to introduce me?" he added, flashing a charming smile at the man to whom he'd taken an instant dislike.

Anna gave a nervous cough. "This is my colleague Arjun Shah. He's from London, England. He studied law at Cambridge. Arjun, this is my boyfriend Rajesh Koothrapalli."

Arjun extended his hand to shake hands with Raj. "Pleased to meet you. Anna tells me that you're an astrophysicist at Caltech. That's pretty impressive." he remarked.

Raj eyed Arjun with suspicion. "Is your wife here tonight, Arjun?" he questioned, despite noticing the absence of a wedding band on Arjun's finger.

Arjun shifted awkwardly on the spot. "Actually I'm getting married next spring." he answered.

"Well congratulations," Raj chimed with an insincere smile. "I hope you and your new wife will both be very happy."

"Thank you. Please excuse me I really should circulate." Arjun said before disappearing into the crowd.

Finally finding himself alone with Anna, Raj was determined to seize the moment to put his plan to propose into action. He had just turned to look up at the night sky in search a star constellation when he felt Anna touch his sleeve.

Raj, I think I want to go home." She said.

Realising that the moment had escaped him Raj's smile evaporated. "Why? Has something happened?" he questioned.

"No, I'm just tired and have a headache. To be honest I'm not really enjoying myself." Anna answered, sounding exhausted.

Raj followed Anna to the cloakroom where he helped her with her coat. "Why don't I call us a taxi?" he suggested. "Maybe when we get home we could put on our matching Christmas pyjamas and watch a movie. I'll even let you choose." he added, hoping to find a way in which to salvage the evening.

"Actually, I want to go home to my place." Anna said quietly.

By now they had reached the marble floored lobby in the centre of which stood a twenty feet tall Christmas tree sparkling with white lights and decorated with silver bows.

"Anna, did I do something wrong?" Raj questioned. "Because I'm really confused here. I thought that we'd worked through our issues."

"Raj, all this has happened so suddenly. A few months ago we were dating and just having fun, I was concentrating on building my career with no thoughts of settling down or having a family….and now you're wanting us to live together, and for me to come to India to meet your parents. It's just overwhelming."

"Anna, we're having a baby together," Raj said pointedly, "I thought you were happy about that."

"I am… I want this baby." Anna stammered, placing her hand on her stomach she felt a tiny kick which sent a tingle up her spine.

"I get it. You want this baby, but you don't want me." Raj concluded, sadly.

There was a silence. Outside the hotel a taxi cab pulled up and a group of partying friends passed by Anna and Raj, singing Christmas songs and laughing as they went.

"So, is that it?" Raj asked as the hotel doorman stepped forward to open the car door for Anna. "You bring me to a Christmas party with all your lawyer friends to break up with me?"

Hating herself for hurting him, Anna could barely bring herself to look Raj in the eye. In truth she'd had no intention of ending their relationship that night, but somehow it had come to just that. "I'm so sorry." She whispered. With her head lowered Anna clambered into the backseat of the taxi, leaving a devastated Raj standing alone at the hotel entrance.

"Where are you headed, Ma'am?" the driver asked as he steered the car onto South Oak Knoll Avenue. By now Anna was crying softly in the shadows of the backseat, her face streaked with mascara. Suddenly it hit her that she had no idea where she was headed. In a two short months she'd be a single mom, juggling work and childcare commitments amidst the continued uncertainty as to who was the father of her baby. There was no denying it was a mess, and one which was largely of her own making.

"Ma'am, I need to know where I'm taking you." the taxi driver repeated impatiently. It was one of the busiest nights of the festive season and he had no time for drunk passengers who were too inebriated to state their destination.

Since getting into the taxi Anna's headache had gotten worse, and was now a constant throbbing. It was then she realised that she'd left her clutch purse behind. Wanting to return to the hotel, Anna opened her mouth to speak only to realise that she couldn't. Her head felt like it was in a vice, her vision so blurred that she could no longer see the driver.

"Ma'am, did you hear me?" the driver said impatiently. Peering in his rear view mirror he saw his passenger slumped on the seat. With an exasperated sigh, he pulled the car over and reached back to rouse her. He couldn't smell alcohol on her breath, and her skin felt hot and clammy.

"Oh my God." he gasped in panic, rather than a drunken party goer he had a semi-conscious and apparently pregnant woman in his taxi. For a second he thought about calling 911, but quickly decided that it would be faster to drive her to the hospital himself.

"Hold on lady I'm going to get you some help," he said, as he pressed his foot down on the accelerator, beeping his horn as he moved into the busy LA traffic. "Just hang in there."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thank you to all of you have taken the time to read and review this fic. Your comments and feedback are very much appreciated.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Big Bang Theory.**

At Lake Arrowhead Lauren and Jake had enjoyed a long and pleasurable day of fishing. When Lauren landed the biggest catch of the day Jake had teased her good-naturedly, challenging her to a rematch the following day. At dusk they packed up their fishing gear and returned to the cabin. After eating dinner Jake lit the log fire, and they settled onto the couch each with a beer.

"Here put this around you." he said passing Lauren a blanket after noticing her shiver.

For a long while Lauren and Jake didn't converse, staying lost in their respective thoughts in the warmth and glow of the fire.

"You know I really had fun today. I'm so glad you invited me." Lauren said finally breaking the silence.

"Yeah, for a girl you didn't do too badly," Jake joked, earning himself a playful swat on the arm from Lauren. "Seriously, it's good to see you smile after everything you've been through recently." he said.

There had been times that day when Lauren had almost forgotten about the events of her recent past, so much so she wished that she could stay longer at the lake instead of returning to Pasadena with all its painful memories of her dead mother. Just then Jake's cell phone beeped.

"It's Bernadette," Jake said as he read the text he'd just received. "She wants to fix me up on a date with somebody from her work."

To her surprise Lauren felt an inexplicable pang of disappointment. "Really? I thought I heard Penny say that you was already dating someone." she said.

"It didn't work out." Jake answered, flatly.

He'd hated himself for lying to Penny in the first place about having a girlfriend, and hated himself even more now for having to lie to everyone else about supposedly breaking up.

"That's too bad. Do you think you will go on the date?" Lauren questioned casually while she absentmindedly peeled the label off her beer bottle.

"Maybe. Bernadette can be pretty persuasive when she wants to be."

"I think you mean scary." Lauren corrected with a mischievous smile.

"Yeah, for someone so small Bernadette can be pretty intimidating." Jake agreed.

"Well, for what it's worth I think you should go on the date. A nice guy like you shouldn't be by himself." Lauren said as she got to her feet. The CD had finished and so she selected another, this time choosing Nickelback. When she sat back down she noticed that Jake had a faraway look in his eye.

"Jake, are you ok?" she asked.

"It's just this song, it reminds me of my college days. It's where I met Lydia."

"Your wife?"

"My first wife. I've been married twice, and both times I screwed up. I don't exactly have the best track record when it comes to relationships."

Downing his beer, Jake looked at the empty bottle in his hand before getting up and moving toward the refrigerator to fetch another.

"Well, I don't think you're a screw up," Lauren started after Jake had returned to his seat on the couch beside her. "You've been such a good friend to me this last month. In fact, somehow it kind of feels like I've known you for years. I like you Jake."

"I like you too," Jake smiled. "Although the beating me at fishing thing today was a little hard to swallow."

Struck by an irrepressible urge which seemed to come out of nowhere, Lauren closed her eyes and pressed her lips to Jake's, and for a few blissful seconds she felt him kissing her back.

"Lauren no….stop," Jake said, pulling himself away from her. "This can't happen, we can't do this…it's wrong."

"What? How can you say that?" Lauren said, sounding hurt.

"Because it _is_ wrong," Jake came back sharply. "Lauren, you're a twenty-three-year-old girl who just lost her mom. I'm almost fifty…For God's sake 'm going to be a grandfather soon."

"So what? Raj is much older than Anna and you don't have a problem with them." Lauren said, referencing the twenty-four-year age gap that existed between his daughter and the soon to be father of his grandchild.

Jake took a deep steadying breath. "Lauren, you're Leonard's daughter. Leonard and Penny are my friends, they've trusted me to look out for these few weeks, surely you can understand that nothing can happen between us."

Turning to walk away, Lauren snatched the blanket from the couch and wrapped it around her shoulders. "I need to get some air." she declared.

From the kitchen window Jake watched Lauren descend at pace down a grassy slope to the edge of the lake where they had fished that day. What had until now been a fun weekend had rapidly spiraled out of control, and he was furious at himself for allowing it to happen. The truth was there was something about being with her that made him feel young and alive again, feelings which both scared and confused him, and the like of which he hadn't felt about any woman other than Penny in many years.

"Lauren, I'm sorry for what just happened," Jake apologised after making his way down to join her by the lake a short while later.

"So what if I'm younger than you, I'm old enough to know my own mind. I'm not some kid who needs babysitting." Lauren burst out angrily, her voice echoing across the still waters of the lake.

"I know you're not." Jake acknowledged. As a Caltech student studying for a master's degree in chemical engineering, Lauren was a highly intelligent young woman, who was very mature for her age. She was a young woman who knew where she was going in life, and he had no doubts that she would get there.

"I'm not like her you know, my Mom I mean," Lauren continued in a calmer voice. "I heard about how she got drunk and threw herself at you at Grace and Joey's wedding. That's not what this is. I've never kissed somebody like this before, but it felt right. I think you felt it today when we were fishing, and you felt it just then when we kissed. There' something between us and it scares you."

Jake was disturbed at just how accurately Lauren had summed up his feelings. He knew there was a danger that the young and carefree part of him that she'd awoken that day could easily succumb to her advances, but it terrified him as to where it might lead. "Lauren, even if there were something between us. What I said before was the truth, I've screwed up so many relationships, believe me the last thing I would want to do is hurt you. You're so vulnerable right now." he said.

"So that's it then? We just pretend like this never happened." Lauren said, her frustration evident in her voice.

Jake was about to reply when his cell phone rang. It was Jesse, his co-worker. At first he ignored it, assuming that it something unimportant like swapping a shift, but when it rang again only seconds later he felt obliged to answer it.

"Jesse, I'm kind of busy right now. I'll call you later." he said before affording Jesse a chance to speak. In the background Jake could hear the familiar sounds of the emergency room, the exchange of the staff as they tended to a patient, and the beeping of a heart monitor.

"Jake, I'm in the emergency room at the Huntington Hospital. It's Anna." Jesse said in a solemn voice.

Hearing Anna's name Jake's chest tightened as panic instantly took hold. "What is it? Is it the baby?"

"She's preeclamptic. The doctor has been trying to get her blood pressure under control, but she's started having seizures. It looks as though they might have to give her a C-section and deliver the baby tonight." Jesse said. Although he'd received training in medical school on how to deliver bad news, nothing could really prepare him for delivering such news to a friend and work colleague. "Jake? Are you still there?" he asked.

At the other end of the line Jake was trying to process what was happening. "She's only twenty-nine weeks." he said gravely, acknowledging the fact that there was every chance now that his grandchild was going to be born premature, and the battle which potentially lay ahead.

"Jake, they're doing everything they can. You know she's in good hands," Jesse said, trying his best to offer some comfort. "Dr Tyndall is with her right now."

Having encountered her frequently in the course of his work as a doula, Jake knew that Dr Tyndall was one of the best obstetricians in the country with an excellent record when it came to obstetric emergencies.

"Anna's boyfriend, Rajesh, is he there?" Jake asked, confused as to why Raj hadn't called him himself since he and Anna were supposed to be attending a Christmas party together that night at the Langham hotel.

"I don't think so. The nurse said that Anna was brought in alone in a taxi." Jesse explained.

It was only by chance when transferring a patient into the resus room that he had recognised Anna laying in the adjacent bed. With no purse or ID, for a while after she'd arrived in the ER her identity had remained unknown.

"I'm at Lake Arrowhead. I'll leave right away, but it'll take me an hour to get there." Jake said.

After hanging up the call. Lauren set about packing up the car while Jake attempted to call Raj, and was shocked when Penny answered.

"Penny, I'm looking for Rajesh." Jake said as he hurriedly locked the front door of the cabin before getting into the car and fastening his seatbelt.

"Well, you've found him. Only he's in not exactly in a fit state to communicate right now." Penny sighed, shaking her head at the sight of her disheveled friend in a tuxedo suit passed out of her couch.

"What do you mean?"

"He showed up drunk and crying at our house an hour ago. I guess you heard about Anna breaking up with him."

Jake of course had no knowledge of his daughter's break up, but given the circumstances it was currently of no importance whatsoever.

"Well, you need to wake him and sober him up, Anna's in the hospital. It looks like she's going to have the baby tonight."

"Oh my God." Penny gasped.

"Look, I don't know what's happened between them, but Raj needs to be there." Jake added sternly.

Penny knew instinctively that it serious, and couldn't help be reminded of her own experience of giving birth to Bobby and suffering a near catastrophic haemorrhage.

"Don't worry, Leonard and I will see that Raj gets to the hospital," she reassured. "Are you on your way?"

"Yeah, but I'm driving back from Lake Arrowhead." Jake told her, making no mention of the fact that Lauren was with him, and that they had spent much of the weekend together.

When Jake and Lauren arrived at the hospital, Lauren was disappointed when he insisted that she take a taxi home, and struggled to hide her hurt when he offered her some money for the fare. In the car she'd felt every bit of his anguish, and had wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold his hand as they'd journeyed in silence, but hadn't dare for fear of being rejected again. Exiting the elevator into the maternity unit, Jake found Penny seated with Raj who appeared to be in an uncomprehending and catatonic state.

"He's barely said a word since we told him about Anna," Penny confirmed. "I think he's in shock or something."

As expected Anna had been taken to the OR for an emergency C-section. All they could do now was wait and hope for the best outcome for mother and child. Shortly afterwards they were joined by Howard and Bernadette at which point Penny offered to go to the cafeteria for coffee.

"Raj, would you like to give me hand?" she asked, believing that if she could get him alone she'd have a better chance of getting him to open up.

Reluctantly Raj got up and accompanied Penny along a bridge walkway which lead to the west tower where the cafeteria was located. "Do you want to talk?" she questioned, gently.

Raj shrugged. "Seriously, what's there to talk about? I've already lost Anna, and now I might lose my baby too." he said, sounding defeated.

"Is that it? Are you not even going to fight for your relationship?" Penny said in disbelief. For someone who claimed to love and want to marry Anna, Raj seemed to be prepared to give up far too easily.

"Penny you weren't there. Anna made it very clear at the party tonight that she didn't want me in her life anymore. She said that I was overwhelming her."

By now the two friends had reached the cafeteria and Penny ordered five coffees to take out. "I just think you shouldn't give up on her," she said as she tapped her credit card on the reader. "Anna's going to need your support more than ever. Take it from me the next few months are going to be tough on both of you. Do you know what is my biggest regret about when Bobby was born?" Penny added, seemingly as an afterthought.

Raj stirred his coffee thoughtfully. At the time of Bobby's birth he'd been living in India after returning to live there following Emily's death. It was something which rarely came up in conversations with Leonard, and so he imagined that there was much he didn't know.

"My biggest regret is that I shut Leonard out, even though I needed him so much," Penny confessed. "I was so consumed with guilt that I couldn't bear to be around him. Leonard had warned me to slow down at work, but I didn't listen. I remember thinking if I had listened to him maybe things wouldn't have turned out the way they did."

Raj had always been envious of Leonard and Penny's relationship and the unshakeable love which they had for each other. He'd found it for a while with Emily, but almost thirteen years after her death he'd not even come close to finding a love again until he'd met Anna. Just then Penny's phone beeped. It was Jake informing her that Anna was out of the OR. By the time they returned to the maternity unit, Dr Tyndall was there with news of Anna and the baby.

"What's happened? How's Anna…and the baby?" Raj demanded anxiously, looking from Jake to Dr Tyndall.

"This is Dr Rajesh Kothrapalli. He's Anna's boyfriend and the father of her baby." Jake introduced.

Dr Tyndall nodded. "I'm pleased to tell you that Anna's baby was delivered safely by caesarean section, Dr Kothrapalli you have a daughter." She smiled.

Raj's eyes began to fill tears of relief and happiness.

"As you know your daughter has come early at 29 weeks, and unfortunately that doesn't come without risks or complications," Dr Tyndall continued, adopting a serious tone. "Her lungs are underdeveloped so she's been taken to the neonatal ICU to be put on a ventilator to help with her breathing and for closer monitoring of her condition."

"But she'll be ok, right?" Raj stammered.

Dr Tyndall explained that with the right care there she had a very good chance of survival, but cautioned that it would be a long road ahead, and potentially several months before she'd be well enough to come home.

"How's Anna?" Jake questioned.

"Anna's doing well. She hasn't come round from the anaesthesia as yet, but when she does she'll be admitted to the obstetric HDU as a precaution. She'll need to stay in the hospital for a few days to make sure that we have her blood pressure under control, but I'm confident that she'll make a full recovery."

Overcome with an enormous sense of relief Raj thanked Dr Tyndall, somehow resisting the inappropriate urge to hug her, he opted instead to shake her hand.

"Congratulations to both of you." She beamed before disappearing through a set of double doors to respond to her pager.

After saying goodbye to the others, Jake and Raj followed a nurse in pink scrubs into the neonatal ICU to meet their daughter and granddaughter for the first time. Overwhelmed by the sight of his tiny baby daughter in an incubator attached to a ventilator, Raj broke down once more. For Jake although it wasn't by far his first time in a neonatal ICU, knowing it was his own granddaughter battling for life made it a different experience all together.

"She looks so vulnerable." Raj said, wiping away his tears with the back of his hand.

For a while the two men didn't speak, sitting in silence amidst the hum of the incubators and the beeping of the monitors.

"I think you should go and see Anna," Jake said. "Don't you think you guys should talk?" he persisted.

Despite an initial reluctance driven by a fear of rejection, Raj nodded his agreement. If nothing else, he wanted to see for himself that Anna was okay, even if it resulted in her sending him away.

"You know I was going to propose to her tonight," he confessed. "I guess I probably should have sought your blessing first, not that it matters now, Anna clearly isn't ready for marriage." he acknowledged sadly, while wondering whether Jake would have given him his blessing had he asked for it.

"Well, maybe she isn't ready just yet, but give her time," Jake said. "One thing about Anna is she doesn't like to be rushed into anything. I reckon there's a good chance she'll come around eventually."

"So, just to be clear, _would_ I have your blessing should I decide to propose in the future?" Raj questioned, hopefully.

It was no secret that Jake had had his doubts about their relationship, but whatever reservations he had he couldn't deny the fact that Raj adored his daughter and that he would be a wonder and doting father to his granddaughter.

"Just so long as you don't start getting ideas about calling me Dad." Jake grinned, landing a playful punch on Raj's arm.

* * *

 **Three Weeks Later…**

Over the next few weeks Raj and Anna kept vigil with Liza, as they decided to name her, in the neonatal intensive care unit. With Christmas now only a few days away, Anna had returned home to shower and to rest before heading back to the hospital. Following the birth of their daughter she and Raj had talked, and after much soul searching she'd decided to give their relationship another chance. The memories of growing up with divorced parents, and without her father around were still painful, and certainly wasn't something she wanted for her own child. In the end she decided that she owed it to her daughter to at least give being a family a chance. Anna had just changed into a fresh pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt when there was a knock at the door, she was surprised to discover that it was Penny.

"Hi Anna, how are?" she smiled.

It was morning and Penny was on her way to the studio to film her last show before the holidays. Later that day she and Leonard were going to drive to the airport to pick up Joey and Grace who were returning home from Chicago.

"I'm fine thanks." Anna answered, forcing an exhausted smile.

Penny thought that Anna still looked a little pale probably from the exhaustion of tending to a newborn in the NICU, it was definitely something she herself could identify with having been through the same experience.

"I'm on my way to work so I won't keep you, but I thought you might like these," Penny said, producing a handful of bodysuits from a bag. "Maddie hardly wore them before they got too small for her. I thought maybe you could have them for Liza."

Penny knew for a fact that Raj had purchased a whole closet full of designer baby clothes, and that they had no real need for Maddie's hand-me-downs. The truth was she wanted an excuse to call in on her.

Anna reached out and took one of the bodysuits, the simple action of touching the soft fabric causing her to dissolve into tears. "I'm sorry," she sobbed. "I'm just tired and emotional right now."

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry," Penny apologised. "I didn't think this through, it was insensitive of me. To be honest it just wanted an excuse to come over here and check in on you. I've been worried about you." she confessed.

Penny was relieved when Anna invited her inside for a coffee. Half an hour later the two friends were onto drinking their second cup.

"It's weird. I always imagined that when my baby arrived it would be a time for celebration. Somehow it feels like I've been cheated out of that." Anna confided.

Penny nodded her understanding. "All the more reason to celebrate even harder when you get to bring Liza home," She said. "Believe me it's just the best feeling in the world."

Anna was so grateful that Penny had paid her a visit. It was the first time since Liza's birth that she'd been able to relax and feel something approaching normal again.

"How's Leonard doing?" she asked.

"He has some good days, and some not so good days. He's a lot happier since Lauren decided to move back in with us."

Lauren returning home to live with Leonard and Penny had all happened rather suddenly, and without an explanation. Penny was curious to know what lay behind Lauren's change of heart, but Leonard had cautioned her not to push her for an answer. She was home where she belonged which was the most important thing.

"I'm so glad you and Raj got back together," Penny said after a brief silence. "I know he doesn't always get things right, but he really is one of the good guys."

Raj had already made an appointment with a well renowned and very expensive therapist in Beverly Hills. For now at least Anna was willing to give their relationship another try.

"Raj's wife Emily you knew her, didn't you? What was she like?" Anna asked, taking Penny a little by surprise.

"What would you like to know?" Penny asked.

"Well, I guess I'm wondering why she and Raj didn't have kids." Anna said.

"Well to be honest I'm not sure," Penny began. "She was always very focused on her career as a doctor." She added, wishing now that Howard had never told her and the others about Raj's alleged infertility.

Just then Penny's cell phone began to ring in her purse, allowing her to breath a silent sigh of relief. "It's my producer, I'd better get going. We're having eight live reindeer in the studio today, no doubt it will be total chaos." she chuckled.

After Penny left Anna went upstairs to fetch some clean clothes for Raj. Opening the beside drawer in search of underwear, she came across what looked like a book with a glossy rose gold cover. Picking it up and leafing through the pages, Anna realised that it was Emily's diary, and although her conscious told her it was wrong she couldn't help but begin to read. And there it was, something so shocking that her legs went weak, forcing her to lower herself onto the bed so as not to fall. Thinking she must be mistaken, Anna reread the entry. But there was no mistake.

"My God Raj can't have children." she whispered.


	12. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Big Bang Theory.**

It was Christmas Eve, and the holiday festivities were underway in the Hofstadter household. In the lounge Grace and Bobby were helping Penny trim the tree, while Albert barked and bounded about excitedly at their feet.

"Sweetie, why don't you check in on Lauren?" Penny suggested, as she climbed down from the step ladder to admire the finished tree, elegantly decorated with an array of twinkling white lights and glass baubles. "I'll order us some pizza for dinner."

Leaving his family engaged in a heated debate over which pizza to order, Leonard made his way upstairs and tapped lightly on Lauren's bedroom door.

"Hey, can I come in?" he asked, gingerly peaking his head around the door he saw Lauren seated at a desk with her laptop open and papers spread out around her.

"Sure."

Closing the door, Leonard ventured into the room. "How's it going?" he asked. After recent events Lauren had fallen behind with her thesis, and was now working hard to make up for lost time.

"Ok, I guess." she shrugged while continuing to type.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Leonard offered, he was aware that Lauren's thesis had a physics component which crossed into his area of expertise and was keen to assist her in any way he could.

"Actually, I'm good. I think I just need to focus."

Leonard cleared his throat, and perched himself on the end of the bed opposite to her. "Lauren, I understand that I'm probably the last person you'd want to talk to right now after everything that's happened," he began. "But I want you to know that I'm here for you, and that I'm so glad that you decided to come home."

As much as Leonard had come to despise Joy, he appreciated how painful it undoubtedly was for Lauren to be spending her first Christmas without her mom.

Lauren smiled gratefully. "You and Penny have been terrific. I'm so lucky to have you guys looking out for me." she acknowledged.

It was then that Leonard noticed the once very familiar mustard yellow vest shirt and blue denim skirt in a cellophane covering hanging on the closet door. "What's this?" he questioned.

"Oh, I decided to take a part time job at the Cheesecake Factory," Lauren replied. "I want to pay my way while I'm here. I have my first shift the day after tomorrow."

"You really don't need to do that," Leonard said. "You're welcome to stay here for as long as you need. We seriously don't expect you to pay rent whilst you're still studying."

"Thanks, but I want to." Lauren insisted. She sensed that now wasn't the time to mention it, but as well as paying her way she wanted to save for a new car and a deposit for an apartment. As much as Leonard and Penny had made her feel welcome, she wanted her own independence sometime in the near future.

"Sweetheart, you're as much a part of this family as any of us. I hope you know that."

As Lauren looked up from laptop she caught a glimpse of the ankle tag protruding from the bottom of Leonard's jeans. It was a stark reminder of everything that had happened, and she couldn't help but think how it had all started after she'd gone looking for him. In many ways she blamed herself for the grave situation he was now facing.

"Anyway, are you hungry? Penny is ordering pizza." Leonard continued after a brief silence.

"Sounds terrific. I just need to finish up here."

Ten minutes later Lauren joined the rest of the family downstairs in the lounge where an excited Bobby presented her with a gift from under the tree.

"Shouldn't I open this tomorrow?" Lauren queried as she looked upon the shiny silver paper, tied up neatly with red ribbon.

"No, you can open it now." Penny encouraged, smiling brightly.

Tearing the paper, Lauren found a sweater bearing an image of a reindeer with sunglasses and a Santa Claus hat.

"It's just a goofy Hofstadter family tradition for us all to wear Christmas sweaters, isn't it sweetie?" Penny explained, slipping her arm around Leonard's waist and planting a kiss on his cheek.

"I picked it out, but you don't have to wear it if you don't like it." Grace interjected.

Lauren was moved by the gesture which reinforced what Leonard had said only a short while ago. She was part of the Hofstadter family now. "Oh no, I love it," she replied in a choked voice. "Thank you, all of you."

* * *

The morning after Christmas Lauren was awake early ready to leave for her first shift at the Cheesecake Factory. After pouring a coffee into a travel mug, and grabbing a slice of toast to eat on route, she went out to her car only to discover to her dismay that the engine refused to start.

"My car won't start!" she announced to Leonard and Penny who were eating breakfast at the kitchen island in their bathrobes. "I'm going to be late for my shift, my manager will probably give my shift away to somebody else and I'll lose a day's pay."

Unable to stop herself smiling at the familiarity of the situation, Penny stood up. "Lauren, don't worry I'll drive you there, just give me a few minutes to get dressed."

Ten minutes later Penny and Lauren were on their way to the Cheesecake Factory. During the short drive Penny began to reminisce about her time as a waitress, and how on countless occasions she'd had to ask Leonard to drive her to work when her own car wouldn't start.

"I used to drive this crappy red Volkswagen Cabriolet. Sheldon was always nagging on at me about the check engine light being on." She recalled with a faraway smile.

"What did you do?" Lauren asked.

"I covered it with a sticker." Penny responded, making Lauren burst out with laughter.

By the time Penny steered her car into the parking lot of the Cheesecake Factory Lauren was feeling a great deal more relaxed and ready to start her shift.

"Just don't forget to push the cheesecake and you'll be fine," Penny advised as Lauren clambered out of the car. "Oh, and make sure you don't let anyone stiff you on your tip."

Thanking Penny again for the ride, Lauren hurried towards the restaurant entrance, fastening her green apron as she went. Penny was about to drive away when she spotted Jake pulling his ambulance into the parking space next to her.

"Hey, Jake," she said, getting out of her car, and waving hello. "How are you?"

"Oh, hi Penny. Are you having breakfast here?" he asked, seeming surprised to see her.

"No, actually I just gave Lauren a ride here. She has a part time job." Penny answered.

"Lauren's working here?"

"Yeah, it's her first shift today."

Just then the front passenger door of the ambulance opened and Jesse, Jake's EMT partner got out. "Penny Hofstadter?" he exclaimed, his eyes widening with disbelief at the sight of the famous actress. "Wow, I mean like wow. I'm such a big fan of yours." he gushed.

"Penny, this is Jesse Morgan. We work part-time together. He's a fourth year medical student at UCLA." Jake said, somewhat embarrassed by co-worker who seemed unable to contain his excitement.

"Would you mind if I took a picture, Mrs. Hofstadter?" Jesse asked, taking out his cell phone, and positioning himself beside Penny for a selfie.

"Please call me Penny." Penny said.

Jake waited impatiently with his arms folded tightly across his chest while Penny posed for a series of photos.

"Actually Jake I'm glad I ran into you," she began after signing her autograph for Jesse who was beaming like he'd just won the lottery. "Leonard and I are having a get together on New Year's Eve, nothing big just a few friends. Would you like to come?"

"I think I'm working New Year's Eve." Jake replied.

"No, you're not," Jesse interjected. "The schedule just got emailed, and you're off that night. In fact, we both are."

"Terrific," Penny smiled. "Would you like to come as well?" she offered, turning to address Jesse who looked as though he might faint with the shock.

"Seriously?"

"Sure, why not. Any friend of Jake's is a friend of mine."

After saying goodbye to Penny, Jake voiced his reluctance to go into the restaurant, saying that he had changed his mind and was no longer hungry. However, after some persistence Jesse managed to persuade him, and a few minutes later they were seated at a table.

"Good morning, welcome to the Cheesecake Factory." Lauren greeted warmly, her smile evaporating when she realised that her first customer of the day was Jake. "Oh, Jake hi…how are you?" she stammered nervously. She hadn't seen him since moving out of his house, leaving a hand-written note on the kitchen table to inform him of her decision.

"I'm good. And you?"

"Fine."

There was a silence and Jesse wondered whether Jake was going to introduce him to the girl with whom he was apparently already acquainted. "Hi, I'm Jesse," he said eventually, deciding to take matters into his own hands by making his own introduction. "Jake and I work together."

"Actually I think we already met, well kind of." Lauren said, blushing.

It was then Jesse realised who she was, remembering her from the night he'd helped Jake carry her into the car after he'd encountered her alone and drunk in a bar.

"Oh yeah sure," Jesse said. "Jake told me about your mom, I'm sorry for your loss." he added, sympathetically.

After taking their initial order for coffee Lauren moved away.

"So that's Leonard Hofstadter's daughter?" Jesse stated thoughtfully, watching Lauren intently as she went about tending to the other tables in her area.

"Yeah." Jake answered, sounding irritated. He'd sensed it was a bad idea coming into the Lauren's place of work, and was annoyed at himself for allowing Jesse to persuade him otherwise.

"Man, she is seriously hot."

"Is she?" Jake said curtly without looking up from his menu.

"Oh come on Jake, when you see girls like Lauren doesn't it make you wish that you were twenty years younger?" Jesse goaded. "I don't suppose you know whether she's dating anyone?"

"I don't, but given that she just buried her mother I seriously doubt she's interested in dating right now." Jake said gruffly in an effort to close down the conversation which was making him incredibly uncomfortable.

"But she'll probably be at Penny's New Year's Eve party, right?" Jesse continued, the look in his eye suggesting that he was hatching a plan. "Sounds like a perfect opportunity for me to get to know her better."

Just then a call came over Jake and Jesse's their radios, alerting them to a fire in a nearby apartment block. ' _All available units to attend.'_ instructed the voice of the dispatcher. With their break now disrupted, Jake took out his wallet and put a note on the table to cover the cost of the coffee and a tip.

"What the heck are you doing?" he demanded when his partner seemed to linger.

Taking out a pen Jesse quickly scrawled his name and number on a napkin. "You know what they say ' _Nothing ventured, nothing gained'_ " he grinned.

* * *

 **New Year's Eve**

Stepping outside into the cool afternoon air seeking some much needed respite from the tense and stress-inducing atmosphere of the NICU, Anna closed her eyes and took a long deep breath. After weeks of keeping vigil beside Liza's incubator she was both physically and emotionally exhausted. Even when she did go home to rest she couldn't sleep, weighed down with the information she'd uncovered in Emily's diary, and yet somehow she couldn't bring herself to confront Raj. Seeing how he doted on Liza, watching over her as she struggled for life, Anna had no doubt that he was totally in love with the baby girl that he knew wasn't his own. Taking out her cell phone, she swiped through her contacts. After several rings a voice finally answered.

"Anna?"

"Arjun?" Anna said, with deafening background noise she could barely hear him. "Where are you?"

From the cacophony of music and voices shouting to be heard, it sounded like he was in a bar.

"I'm in London. Hang on, I'll go outside."

Excusing himself from his companions, Arjun headed for the door and onto the cobbled pavement of Covent Garden outside the Punch and Judy pub. Nearby a fire eater was entertaining a crowd of people, his performance generating a series of oohs and aahs.

"Anna, are you ok?" Arjun asked. "I've been calling you, I must have left a dozen messages, I've been so worried about you."

"I'm sorry," Anna apologised. "I meant to call you back, but things have been crazy. Liza is doing better. She's getting stronger every day."

"That's good to hear," Arjun said, sounding relived. "I heard that you and Raj decided to get back together. I'm really pleased that you're working things out. Raj is a terrific guy." he added, his voice somewhat lacking in sincerity.

For Anna her resolve to tell Arjun about Raj and her discovery in his late wife's diary was rapidly dwindling. "So, are you in London for the holidays?" she questioned.

"Actually Prisha and I have brought the wedding forward. We're getting married tomorrow." Arjun answered.

All at once Anna felt as though she'd been punched in the chest, knocking the air out of her. "I thought you weren't getting married until the spring?" she said, sounding startled.

"We weren't, but we had a change of plans."

"Will you be coming back to LA?"

"To be honest I don't know. Prisha and I have a lot of things to work out," Arjun answered. "Listen Anna, I'm sorry I'd better go. I'm actually on my stag party."

One of his friends was leaning out of the pub door, beckoning him impatiently inside for another round of drinks.

"Ok sure, have fun," Anna said, blinking back her tears. "Good luck for tomorrow, I'm happy for you."

Suddenly Arjun realised that he still didn't know why Anna had called him. "Anna, are you sure you're ok?" he questioned.

It was 11pm and the street was crowded with New Year's Eve revelers streaming down towards the river Thames to watch the fireworks on the embankment. Soon Arjun would be one of them, seeing in a new year which would bring huge changes to his life.

"I'm fine, really. I'm just really tired." Anna said, smiling through her tears.

"Well, you take care of yourself, and Anna, happy new year."

After hearing hanging up, Anna collapsed down onto the bench behind her, sobbing with her head in her hands.

"Anna?"

Feeling a sudden hand on her shoulder Anna jumped, and looked up to see her father standing over her with a deep-set look of concern.

"Anna, what is it? Is it Liza?" he demanded, instantly fearing that the worst.

Anna was shaking and crying piteously, prompting Jake to take off his jacket and drape it around his distraught daughter's shoulders. "Sweetheart, please just tell me what's happened." he begged.

Anna looked up to reveal her mascara streaked face. "I can't Daddy. I can't."

* * *

At Leonard and Penny's house the guests had started to arrive for their New Year's Eve get together. First Sheldon and Amy, followed by Bernadette and Howard. In the kitchen Penny had set out the Chinese takeout containers on the island, and was busy ensuring that everybody had a drink. Next to arrive was Jesse, whose jaw visibly dropped at the sight of Lauren in the black sequin midi dress which Penny had insisted she treat her to on a recent shopping trip.

"See I told you he wouldn't be able to take his eyes of you in that dress." Penny whispered knowingly into Lauren's ear.

"I really wish you wouldn't encourage her," Leonard said quietly after Lauren and Jesse had moved away to circulate among the other guests. "I don't want her to get hurt."

Jesse had already taken Lauren out for dinner earlier that week, and seemed to be keen to carry on dating her.

"Sweetie, I don't think you need to worry. Jesse seems like a really nice guy. If anything I think it will do her good to have some fun." Penny said.

A while later Jake arrived, and Penny couldn't help but notice that he seemed distracted and even more reticent than he had been of late. "I probably won't stay long. I have an early shift tomorrow." he told her as she took his jacket.

Heading into the kitchen, Jake made towards Howard and Bernadette who were helping themselves to the food. "Hi Jake, it's good to see you." Bernadette said, after swallowing a bite of spring roll. "How are you finding being a grandfather?" she asked. Onto her second glass of wine, she was already a little tipsy.

Instead of answering Bernadette, Jake turned to Howard and with an earnest expression asked if he could speak with him alone.

"So, what's up?" a bemused Howard questioned after the two men had gone outside onto the terrace beside the Hofstadter's swimming pool.

"I went by the hospital earlier. Anna was very upset, inconsolable in fact. Are she and Raj having problems again?" Jake asked.

"Don't you think you should be having this conversation with Anna?" Howard said pointedly.

"I tried. She completely clammed up and insisted she was ok, but I know my daughter well enough to know when there's something wrong," Jake began. "Howard, you're Raj's best friend, I figured if there was anyone he'd confide in it would be you."

Howard shifted uncomfortably from one foot to another. "Well, like you say Raj is my best friend, and if he did talk to me I would never break his confidence, but for its worth he hasn't said anything. All I know is right now he's desperate at the thought of losing Liza. He'd do anything for that baby girl."

Over Howard's shoulder Jake caught a glimpse of Jesse and Lauren canoodling and made his mind up there and then to leave the party as soon as he could. "Ok well, thanks. I guess I'll have to try talking to Anna again."

Later, with only ten minutes to go until the new year Penny realised that Leonard was missing from the party.

"So, this is where you're hiding out," she said after eventually finding him in his office with the light switched off. "If you're trying to escape Sheldon and his throat singing the coast is clear, he just threw up in the flowerbed. Amy is taking him home."

Seated at behind his desk with a glass of whiskey in his hand, Leonard failed to raise even a flicker of a smile.

"Sweetie, you're not still worried about Lauren and Jesse, are you?" Penny continued.

Earlier in the evening Penny had surprised Lauren and Jesse with VIP tickets to one of Los Angeles hottest nightclubs, and assumed that Leonard was mad at her for encouraging their relationship.

"It's not Lauren."

"Then what is it?"

Leonard downed the dregs of his whiskey. "Honey, now is really not the time."

Moving towards her husband, Penny lifted herself onto the edge of the desk and crossed her legs. "Well actually I think now is the time. So, out with it Hofstadter." she instructed.

"Alright, if you insist. I went to see my lawyer today." Leonard started.

"Oh, really?" Penny exclaimed. Leonard had only been out once that day, she'd thought to go to the local store for supplies for the party that night, and was disturbed to realise now that he hadn't been honest with her. "I guess you have a still have a lot of preparation for the trial, but I would have rather you'd told me where you were going instead of concocting some story about going to the store."

Leonard bowed his head and let out a deep regretful sigh. "Penny, there isn't going to be a trial."

Bewildered, Penny gave a nervous laugh. "Sweetie, what do you mean there isn't going to be a trial? Of course there's going to be a trial, you're innocent, you need to clear your name."

"Jeffery is recommending that I enter a plea bargain."

"And what the hell does that mean?"

"It means that the charge against me will be reduced to voluntary manslaughter in exchange for my pleading guilty."

"But… you'll go to jail." Penny gasped anxiously.

"The fact is if my case goes to trial and I'm convicted I could be looking at a life sentence. Pleading guilty to a lesser charge would mean less jail time."

"What happened to fighting this? You promised me you weren't going to give up," Penny yelled accusingly at Leonard. "And what about me and the kids, did you even think about us when you made your decision?"

"Penny, I haven't stopped thinking about you and the kids. You're the reason I'm doing this." Leonard said, sadly.

"Well, I'm not going to let you do it," Penny concluded defiantly. "I'm not going to let you plead guilty to a crime you didn't commit to wind up in some hell hole of a prison when the person who murdered Joy is out there somewhere roaming free."

Reaching for her, Leonard grasped his hands on Penny's shoulders. "Honey, believe me it's the only way," he said. "The police aren't looking for anyone else. As far as they're concerned they have Joy's murderer. Without any witnesses to testify in my favour, and with all the evidence against me it's extremely unlikely that a jury would acquit me. I have to accept that."

By now tears were streaming down Penny's cheeks. "No, no, no you can't." she sobbed, helplessly.

Outside in the yard their friends were counting down the final few seconds until the new year, followed by shouts of happy of new year as midnight stuck. With that Penny flung her arms around her beloved husband's neck, holding him so tightly that he felt as though she might never let him go.

"Penny I'm so sorry." Leonard whispered.

* * *

At home Anna wandered alone into the nursery and gazed down upon the empty crib. It was midnight, and the room was penetrated with the sound of explosions and flashes from nearby fireworks. With a shaky hand, she swiped her phone and pressed dial. It was 8am in London, and the morning of Arjun's wedding. She knew her timing was appalling, but something told her that he needed to know, and that if she didn't now, she might never share the truth with him.

"Anna?" Arjun said, answering the call immediately. He'd barely slept after laying awake for the longest time thinking about her. In a few hours a taxi would arrive to take him to his lavish wedding on top of the Shard, and then later that day to a Hindu temple in central London for a religious ceremony attended by hundreds of guests.

"Arjun, I'm sorry to call you now, I know you're about to get married, and believe me I've really thought hard about whether I should call you."

"Are you ok?" Arjun interrupted, rising up from the bed he saw his wedding tuxedo hanging on the closet door, serving as a reminder that he was about to marry a woman he wasn't ever sure he loved.

Anna paused to take a deep steadying breath. "There's something you need to know."


End file.
